I was so fucking stupid to take so many art commissions, I should have just let myself starve
I can't draw, not one fucking bit
I've only ever drawn anything good when I got lucky and I was stupid enough to take advantage of it
I'm going to freaking cause permanent damage to my brain or something the way things are going
I already feel like I'm going to have a mental breakdown
Posted by TaciturnTiger 7 years ago Report
Goodness. I've been there before, and have gone all the way into a mental breakdown. Twice, I've been hospitalized for going damn near insane. A trip to the psych ward isn't a pleasant thing, believe me. You don't want to go there.
I can't blame you for wanting to take on so many commissions, especially if you needed the funds to survive. In your previous blog from a few hours ago, I'd read someone suggesting you offer pixel art replacements. That definitely sounds like a good idea, if it'd be something more up your alley. I sincerely hope your commissioners will understand one way or the other, whether you ask them to expect a delay or offer to give them a replacement work.
And, please, don't think your art is bad. We're all better than a million people, and a million people are all better than us. I've had meltdowns where I felt my own art sucks. And you know what? I still have fans, as you do. It doesn't matter if you're a five-star artist or not -- we all have our inspirations. I look up to Lumesa, who looks up to Hungry Succubus, who looks up to even better artists than the three of us combined. And, believe me, you have your own fans and friends.
Please, hang in there. The last thing I'd want you to do is put yourself at risk. If you get hospitalized, it'll be a sucky experience and will cost you even more money than you likely don't have right now, insurance be damned. And if you hurt yourself, you're going to break the hearts of so many people.
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Posted by kernac 7 years ago Report
Just relax, I know how you feel, I've been there. Do you often feel stressed? Sad? Anxious? You might wanna talk to your doctor about depression. Here is my experience: I was able to draw somewhat alright and then I begun having depression... then I couldn't draw anymore... I just felt everything I drew was shit and couldn't draw anything... then I got treatment for my depression and I begun feeling better and eventually I started drawing again and I actually like what I draw now and I'm improving.
I have no idea if you're actually suffering from depression, I can only say that when I was suffering from depression I couldn't draw for shit, its like all creativity had been sucked from my mind. I'm just saying, if you produced decent art before and now you can't that might be something to look into.
Also: Don't worry too much about my commission, its okay if it takes months or even if you don't do it at all, consider my money a donation to keep you off starvation.
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Posted by Indighost 7 years ago Report
Lol that's one way to learn a lesson. Hang in there and always remember, don't be afriad to say "No."
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