My boyfriend's vore fetish

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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby sovet » Sun Mar 11, 2012 3:48 am

Jennylane26 wrote:Thanks for all these tips! They have really shed some insight and it was kind of you to respond. He initiated pretending he was inside my stomach for a while with me telling him he was "trapped" which he asked for, but he eventually said it stopped arousing him (I said that was probably because he doesn't like to be inside people, he prefers being a spectator). I have asked him several times for ideas or things I can do and told him I was open to whatever he needed but he claims there is nothing because it is impossible to re-create in real life and my belly isn't large enough to pretend someone is inside it. He said he wished he could ask someone from home or our uni with the same fetish so I figured I'd come here. He likes watching human vore (girl on boy), big bellies, seeing someone trapped and thats really all the info he said he could think of.


Your situation sounds almost exactly similar to mine. I'm... somewhat... difficult to please, though it my paraphiliac disorder doesn't seem quite as severe as your boyfriend. As completely annoying as this is, this is what I suggest. I suggest you question him about what he actually likes, whether it should be fatal or not, whether it should be willing or not, and what's appealing to him about vore. It's entirely possible that he's not opening up about what he really likes for some reason. Be aware that many people on the site have rather extreme tastes including myself, so I had some degree of difficulty explaining that I like unwilling stories with death, taunting and disposal. Yes it's gross and inconvenient, but it works like a charm. Essentially what I do is I get told third person stories while I am pleasured.

If it becomes impossible to please him, he needs to be weened off of fetish stuff, or see a therapist.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby randomthefox » Sun Mar 11, 2012 4:03 am

Uh, probably a little late on this one, but I dunno, this kinda seemed like an obvious suggestion to me, but maybe find good vore smut material that turns him on and fuck while he's looking at/reading that? You know, if you got a laptop have that on the bed stand or somewhere he can see the screen and there's something vorishly erotic on there while you're doing stuff, or if not that could print it out. Or something. Or buy some Viagra.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Sehnsucht » Sun Mar 11, 2012 6:16 am

This post contains advice but mostly encouragement. I used to be in a similar position as your boyfriend. I found my then-girlfriend (now-wife) very attractive, but sex didn't get me off. It was enjoyable but never as mindblowing as I thought it should be.

My wife was very understanding. She'd long known about my vore fascination, but when I told her my concerns that sex just wouldn't be as good as my private fantasy life she encouraged me to keep a fantasy running in my head while we were having sex. This made it easier to perform, and I also felt more comfortable with fantasising, which I'd previously avoided doing. Being able to consistently perform helped me a great deal. We also occasionally roleplayed---just told stories while making love---and that was wonderful.

This is the sort of thing that a couple can get really good at. It felt intimate, intensely personal, and we both loved it. Our sex life was great. A few years ago, I realised with astonishment that we'd just had mindblowing (as in, shaking for five minutes after) sex and I hadn't maintained any sort of vorish fantasy at all.

In retrospect, I think that sex is a skill, and I (a) wasn't immediately great at it but more importantly (b) didn't know how to appreciate it. I had the urges, but didn't even know what I liked. It might be that this is what your boyfriend means when he says he doesn't find breasts attractive---I've said the same thing. Have patience, play around, be sure to let him know when he gets your rocks off (be sure to get your rocks off) and remain as marvellously open and understanding as you are.

(Incidentally, I think many of the suggestions in this thread are fantasies on behalf of the posters. Quiet, whispered stories, meaningful glances and licked lips were all it took to teach me the value of sex.)
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby ArcaneSigil » Sun Mar 11, 2012 4:41 pm

Something I've noticed in my vore loving friends, who are all girls amazingly enough... <.< >.> o.o all of their boyfriends like UB the most. I also had one of them ask this exact question to me once and I asked her what he liked. As soon as she said "unbirth" I stopped her and said, "Try with dolls that will fit. That's most likely to work in this situation." My advice is to find out exactly what he likes best about Vore and work around that. Ask him what kind of Vore he likes the most, and depending on his answer, figure out something that will work for him and you in the long run without harming either of you. ... Heh, I swear, one of these days, some scientist is bound to find a chemical that alters the human body so we can swallow other humans whole without being hurt. Or possibly make Anthros, Giant Ferals, and other vorish creatures reality. To be honest, I'm waiting for it, but I'd gladly help out any way I could.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Sergit » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:05 pm

If all else fails, you two could just pretend that you are together inside an stomach. Like, a thight place, with low light. Maybe, both of you can try, doing it in the shower, or an humid and warm place, as to emulate the supposed wetness of an stomach.

But besides that, if your boyfriend requires Vore to feel aroused, he probably needs help. A fetish should improve sexual relations, not restrict or put limitations to them.

I hope you two have luck! ^_^
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby tracker9922 » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:21 pm

Scion wrote:he clearly has a porn/fetish addiction, weening himself off his fetish will help.


going to agree here with Scion.. There's nothing wrong with Vore or any fetish (in as far as it doesn't end up with causing someone or something harm..) but if someone's that wrapped up in something that they lose responsiveness to more normal things.. then that is an addiction.

it's not just a fetish either, regular pornography and things like that can cause it.. He learns to respond to only his own signals, theres no pressure, he see's what he wants.. it's easy to become addicted to it and it's not healthy if it blunts responses to normal sex.. so weening off of this is definately a step in the right direction IMO.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby buttman » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:22 pm

Sounds like a chemical imbalance in the norepinephrine system to me.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby deleteduser301 » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:36 pm

Jennylane26 wrote:My boyfriend and I have been dating for a while and I love him very much. He told me he had a vore fetish in the beginning of our relationship. He had hinted he had one before and was very ashamed of it and hadn't told anyone, but when he told me I reacted with complete acceptance and told him I didn't think it was weird or bad at all and if he needed to incorporate his fetish into our romantic life he could. I still stand by that, I don't think its wrong or anything.He originally wanted to rub/squeeze my belly which I told him was fine with (it actually feels very nice) but then he stopped doing this as much and started touching my breasts. As of recently though, I tried giving him a handjob and his penis kept on going soft. He then admitted he wasn't aroused by my breasts at all and seeing me or other women naked didn't excite him or thinking about/ watching porn with sex, even though he said he found me beautiful and seeing me as a model in a swimsuit fashion show at uni before we went out did make him find me attractive. I tried to react as calmly and positively as I could but he was still upset about not being able to perform for me or finding the "normal" things attractive. I tried to comfort him the best I could but was at a loss for words so I decided to post here to get some ideas about what to tell him. I completely accept his vore fetish and don't have an issue with it but don't know how to please him, I have large breasts but a very small, flat waist region.Will he be able to get erect and have sex? How could we put vore elements into our sex life so he could finish? I just want him to be happy and be able to please him. Any ideas would help, thank you!



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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby A Nonny Moose » Sun Mar 11, 2012 6:28 pm

Something I've seen in another thread, but I'm altering it a bit:

Maybe try going at it inside of a sleeping bag in a warm shower. The water won't go high, and it will be dripping through the top. It may also seem stomach-like if you go in head first together!

Also, role playing type stuff. I liked the suggestion about your tits being bigger because you ate and digested someone earlier.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby icecle18 » Sun Mar 11, 2012 7:45 pm

He's really lucky to have found someone as understanding as you and he should try and explore more what turns him on.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Imrhys » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:29 pm

My ex wife and I toyed around with this stuff for ten years sorting out what worked, particularly for both of us. See if you yourself don't have a fetish that he has to try to fulfill while you take care of his fetish, life is a lot easier.

RP, talking him through a scene he loves the idea of, that is... wow, used to have some mind blowing orgasms to that. But the big thing you could do? Come here with him and let him show you what he likes and find something you are good at "guiding" him through dirty talk or RP wise, and that is your go to. There were two, three things ex could always do for me to get me off. Now mind you, i didn't always like that she had to do it, so beware he could become... self hating/loathing over needing these things.

Patience is a virtue here. If you two keep at it, you'll find a way to make it work. In my case it helped I got married to someone as big a freak as me about what she liked to do and how open minded she was.

And as AndrewLondon above said, never forget to get your rocks off. He needs to learn what you like or long term... you will come to resent helping him so much and you getting little to nothing.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby blergle » Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:28 am

I notice only one person suggested finding him a therapist. There's nothing wrong with having a fetish UNLESS it's hurting someone, and it sounds like it's starting to hurt him. A good therapist will NOT try to change his liking for vore, but WILL try to find the cause of his inability to maintain arousal under other circumstances and try to help him past that block, very possibly using his existing preferences as a tool to facilitate things. It's pretty simple--if he's happy and it enhances his sex life, it's a good fetish. If he's not, it needs some tinkering by a professional until it's a good fetish again.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Sehnsucht » Tue Mar 13, 2012 2:09 pm

blergle wrote:I notice only one person suggested finding him a therapist.

Yeah, you've certainly got a point if Boyfriend has a big problem and can't make progress on it. I didn't get that impression from the OP, though.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Cilis » Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:41 pm

I'll come out of lurk to say this as a former victim of ED.

Things that can cause it and why; ( In young men, older men can add heart disease to the list. )

1.) Stress
2.) Fear
3.) Excessive masturbation
4.) Cutting calories
5.) Sleep deprivation
6.) Low testosterone
7.) Being overweight
8.) Low temperature

1+2; The penis hides itself when a man is feeling either of those emotions, this is so that we are discouraged from trying to mate when our life is in danger, and it is also to enable us to run if we need to. This sucks especially because if a guy begins to have anxiety over getting it up, he sets himself up in a fail cycle.


Treat it by focusing not on his orgasm, but making him more aware of his body and the sensations... repeatedly get him hard, then let him get soft, this teaches him that he can get erection after erection, and takes focus off staying hard long enough to orgasm. Specifically do this as a relaxing exercise with no thought of actual sex in mind, it's just playing around and loving on each other, taking the stress and fear out of it.

3; The brain rewards us with happy chemicals, but it gets us to seek out new sources of food/ mates/ pleasure by making us get tired of the current "Dose" which is why junkies need more and more drugs to feel good, and why some people cheat. This is why extreme fetishes come about as well. It's all an effort to get the same high. If he masturbates daily, he may need to stop outside of once a week, give his body time to become responsive to the chemicals again, they only get numb from over-exposure.

You can also send him out on a 10 minute walk, the exercise will increase serotonin and dopamine receptiveness as exercise is proven to.

4.) Simply put, the body goes into survival mode when one diets. Testosterone is stopped because the body doesn't want to make babies when they can't be fed at the expense of the father being able to eat, it also does this because it can shrink muscles by doing so, which lowers the caloric need of the man. Try a big meal and attempt sex some hours later.

5.) Testosterone is fairly complex, the majority of it is made while a man is asleep. Any lack of sleep will make the testosterone levels drop like a stone. Make sure your man gets sleep, and that he gets enough zinc, a critical mineral for making sperm and testosterone.

6.) Naturally this is self explanatory. Treatments include replacement or stimulation. Stimulation is based off of using drugs like clomiphene citrate to make the pituitary gland order more testosterone be made by the testicles. This is the better option, as the testicles will not atrophy/ become smaller with disuse. Replacement will cause some testicle shrinking, but replacement is far more convenient as they make implants for it.

7.) Excess weight converts testosterone into estrogene in a process called artimos (I know I spelled that wrong) which prompts more fat storage, which prompts more estrogene conversion by the fat cells.

8.) Being cold fires off an insecurity anxiety with most people because most have been brought up to feel uncomfortable with being naked around others. That insecurity hampers arousal and climax in males and females. The simple solution is to wear socks

They had couples having sex with their brains being scanned, only half of the couples tested the first time could manage a climax in either partner, when women and men wore socks or stockings, the added warmth greatly eased the insecurity activity in the brain, which rose the number of those able to climax during brain scans to 80%.

Last piece of advice; Cialis offers a waiver, as does viagra and livertra. He can see a doctor and request to try samples, or request prescription, and try it out.

Those drugs work by retarding the decay of the chemicals that cause erections, when I was on those drugs, I could distract myself entirely, but thanks to the drugs, my erection stayed firm because those chemicals went to breaking down in mere moments, to lasting 10 minutes of no stimulation or erotic thought.

The pill is a great comfort to have because you know if you need it, it's there, and your anxiety as a male is eased.
Last edited by Cilis on Wed Mar 14, 2012 10:22 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Imrhys » Tue Mar 13, 2012 7:23 pm

Cilis wrote:I'll come out of lurk to say this as a former victim of ED.

Things that can cause it and why; ( In young men, older men can add heart disease to the list. )

1.) Stress
2.) Fear
3.) Excessive masturbation
4.) Cutting calories
5.) Sleep deprivation
6.) Low testosterone
7.) Being overweight
8.) Low temperature


This is excellent piece of info, because several of these I have myself in action and know they are true and valid. That last one with the "wear socks" advice is hilarious to now know why, because ex and I got to wearing socks in bed just because of this issue, lmao.

Thank you for sharing this, even if it might be overkill for our young lady's man problem, because any young couple can use this info for YEARS to come.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby blergle » Wed Mar 14, 2012 12:41 am

Wow, Cilis. Thank you, that was an awesome post in every way.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby MenchiCutlets » Wed Mar 14, 2012 5:06 am

I would be tempted to say you should poke and talk to him about anything else thats happening in his life, is everything okay with his family, is there troubles with work or school. The reason I say this is cause I had a similar spell for a period where nothing would arouse or make me interested in anything sexual, but I had so much rubbish happening in my life it was affecting me mentally as well as physically.

Keep your chin up though, and definately dont do anything drastic to change yourself, and maybe he just needs a tap on the head. :)
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby cocopanda » Wed Mar 14, 2012 5:52 am

There's not much else I can say that hasn't already been said... but you should consider the fact if your bf has trouble keeping an erection and arousal in anything but one single fetish, it is a much deeper issue. Having to rely 100% on a fetish will eventually take a real toll on your sex life. I'm not trying to be cynical, but it's just the harsh reality.

It sounds like you've tried very hard to make this fetish close enough to reality for him, and I commend you for your devotion. However, by the looks of it, even if you guys get lucky one day and end up having a great roleplay with great results, sadly it doesn't mean THAT will last forever... Revisiting that roleplay again and again will likely get boring for him eventually (sooner for you probably too) and he'll need something else.

For a long term committed relationship, having sexual attracting to your partner is kind of... a must, if you want a consistently happy sex life.

Do you feel maybe he has some sort of depression issues in his life? It would be something that make need extra, outside help.


HOWEVER, that aside, there may be a chance it's not as bad as it seems, and you do have a chance of fixing it yourself.
Maybe what he needs is to be able to strongly correlate with real life sexual situations and with you, so eventually he will only need those things to start getting aroused.

Keep up the dirty talk, and try to see what phrases and words get him going. Try foodplay. Be imaginative. Everyone already said some good ideas.

If none of that seems to work, then it might be time for some outside help.

Goodluck!
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby French_snack » Wed Mar 14, 2012 6:22 am

He's certainly lucky to have you!

Needing to act out his fetish in a realistic manner is certainly difficult. As Katievore1 suggested, if his problem is that your "belly isn't large enough to pretend someone is inside it", then perhaps you could tell him you've eaten up a number of shrunken people (to explain why your tummy isn't bulging). If you play-act (rubbing your tummy, licking your lips, saying how delicious they were and how good it feels to feel these little people move about inside you...), maybe that will be good enough to work.
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Re: My boyfriend's vore fetish

Postby Cilis » Wed Mar 14, 2012 10:24 am

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/4111360.stm?lsm

Yes, the socks thing is rather hilarious. It's also why Peter Norse wears them in a lot of his shoots. You can also see the chick from debbie does Dallas wearing them. It works, real is better than acting on camera ;p
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