Commissions and Health.
Posted by GTSdev 6 years ago
fluff.gif
Hello everypony. I have something i have been wanting to talk about for quite long, a thought that striked me a few years back and just have gotten traction lately due to my realization of my own limitations.
But before i go there, i want to thank everypony who enjoys my streams (despite the long waits in between, seriously, your patience is very appreciated <3) thank you for joining and making my day a little brighter and in return i hope i put a smile here and there.
Now for the main topic. As meny of you know, i have a very “vague” commission policy, and while it have hurt me a bit to be so vague about it all, i still think it was my right choice based upon my own mental health and mindfulness and i can only hope that some understanding can be seen in this decision. That said, i still struggle alot with my self esteem aside from my struggle with social cues and anxiety. While i dont want to go on a rant about how i feel and think and all that, i can only say that its abit complicated and i dont expect much understanding from the way i view certain things.
For the past few years, i have been taking some commissions from friend, friends i feel i can trust closely and people who have a place in my heart. Unfortunately, this unprofessional approach to taking commissions weren't all problem free. While i could trust people more, it also brought new emotional issues with it that just made it feel just as difficult. I don’t do the streams because i need economic support at all, it was/is more of a confident booster to myself to maybe harden myself to what life awaits me out there, and it did. It gave me confidence to try, it gave me some self esteem, knowing that i do have some worth in a few people's eyes, and it also made me more happy with my skills.
But while it did help me a great deal with certain things, it unfortunately brought other things with it, things i can't deal with mentally at all. It really starts to mess up my life as i am prone to alot of dumb routines, such as bad sleep patterns, forgetting to eat or eat properly, and when i factor in the amount of stress i feel from a pressure lurking from a comission i know i need to finish, i simply dont get anything done. I am forever inspired and touched by all the artists out there who can manage this sort of life, and my heart goes out to you all for putting through with the things that i can not ..
It is with a very heavy heart, that i will announce that i will take no more commissions anymore.
I am so sorry for everyone who have yet to have or have wanted a piece from me, and it truly strikes me right in my chest thinking about it. I know meny must feel cheated or sad, but i can ensure you that i will not stop drawing ponies or vore at all.
When i am done with this current commissions, i will cease taking commissions at all, im sorry, but i have to take care of my own health and it took me some time to realize this.
Posted by SplitterPic 6 years ago Report
the important thing is that you will feel better.
do always what you feel is better for you and continue to put a smile on who follow you for your person and for your great potential as artist ^^
i hope you will always feel better and better ^^
(and sorry if i'm not a big talker )
[ Reply ]
Posted by PegaSUS 6 years ago Report
Sorry about the stresses that came along with commissions. It takes courage to come out about this stuff, though! Thanks for giving us a heads up about your situation. Hope your health returns to you with surplus!
[ Reply ]
Posted by TheCrystalDemon 6 years ago Report
You should take care of yourself first. No need to feel bad about stopping commissions if they are bad for your mental health.
[ Reply ]