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- April 2018
I have Patreon now.
   Sun Apr 01, 2018 6:32 am

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Some vague waffle about Patreon and other shit.

Permanent Linkby Thatonepred on Tue Mar 13, 2018 2:01 pm

Right. Confession time. Part of me is fucking sick of writing.


...It's not the whole story. I'm sick of myself, to be honest, I'm veering in and out of misanthropy and self-loathing, and I think vore isn't really all that interesting to me any more. And yet a part of me wants to write, even as I feel like banging my head against the wall.

As a result, I haven't written anything. Much. There was a couple of paragraphs of an implied vore story, but... meh. Bugger it. The amount of fucks I have for... anything is zero. Except spelling/grammar mistakes, because sieg heil.

Look, I'm not going to lie here. What I said last blog was more motivation for myself than anything else. I wanted to write/complete those stories but... I just can't generate the fucks needed to do so. And as much as I want a hard reset on my emotional... system, for lack of a better term, A) Getting drunk isn't an option at the moment and B) I don't know if I can feel anything other than negative emotions - sorrow, hate, frustration, anger...

Huh. Reminds me a little of a story I wrote last year. Non-vore, it was during a massive depressive fit, and my only outlet.

Anyway, there's been an idea rolling around in my head for some time, but something I never acted on because... well, you've already read the first main reason. The other is... I just writ for shits and giggles.

So. If - and ONLY if - I started writing again, how many people, who read this blog, my stuff, whatever, would donate money to me on Patreon? I haven't set up any accounts and... have no idea how it works, to be honest. Nor do I particularly care at this very instant.

Anyway, I better wrap this up. Some putz didn't give me some vital information, and I got something that's demanding my attention.

Everyone dies. Few live forever. Neither apply to Me.
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Re: Some vague waffle about Patreon and other shit.

Permanent Linkby Alienraptor on Tue Mar 13, 2018 9:40 pm

if i had free money yeah id donate
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Re: Some vague waffle about Patreon and other shit.

Permanent Linkby Assimilation on Wed Mar 14, 2018 4:05 am

I don't think a Patreon is necessarily a good idea for you, and I want to be clear that my opinion isn't because of any negative opinion towards your writing skill.

If you're futzing about with a blank page open, and you're looking for something to make yourself begin to type, opening up a Patreon for that purpose is a risky gamble—not financially, but emotionally. Successful creators on Patreon typically have already cultivated a motivated fanbase (which isn't my qualm for you) that they will interact with and for which they'll muster a sort of "heightened personality" during those interactions (which is my qualm). "Heightened personality" is one of several common descriptors that popular vloggers, bloggers, and potentially cloggers will use to refer to how they'll put in extra energy into being amicable, bombastic, or just generally engaging to others. If you're not prepared to approach Patreon as an environment where you have to "put on a show" to engage patrons, it can drain your spirit.

There's the very real possibility that you could create a Patreon page, start getting a fistful of fivers per month, and be happy with the structure provided by the give-and-take of the Patreon creator-and-fan dynamic. But it's also a very real scenario for someone to feel the heavy, crushing weight of obligation to write the things they don't really feel like writing. If you're like me, an obligation that isn't handled on a timely basis breeds shame and all sorts of negative emotion that makes it harder for me to function, and then it spirals into another depressive episode that takes weeks before it goes away without any discernible reason.

As I understand it, you're looking for motivation to write. Instead of calling over Obligation, with her edges sharp on both sides, I would recommend you search for Inspiration, who will always carry you as far as your whim precisely chooses. Don't make yourself try to complete the stories you've already progressed through if it's proving to be a mire of misery; instead, as soon as your imagination is tugged upon by a passing thought, chase it. Start scribbling and see where it takes you.


PS: Despite my post ending very pointedly about doing something other than Patreon for your issues, if you're prepared to try out Patreon in full knowledge that it's not supposed to be a great solution to writer's block, but instead just because you're curious to see how much coin you could collect on your authorship thus far, then you should give it a shot. I might throw in a dollar if I feel the impulse.
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Re: Some vague waffle about Patreon and other shit.

Permanent Linkby Thatonepred on Sat Mar 17, 2018 5:04 am

Assimilation wrote:snip

I've congitated on this since I've read it every chance I got. Wasn't quite sure how to answer. I think I have my own answer on how to continue with the writing, but in the meantime, I think I'll set up a Patreon page soonish. Far as I'm concerned, worst case scenario, nothing changes. Best case... Well, knowing it isn't the answer to my problems is a step forward, so there's that. Still, there's been a few balls rolling, including getting through Bloodborne (you have no idea how inspiring that game is), that's lifting my mood, so, hopefully, I can get the will to write again.

And... thanks. For the common sense. I need to stop looking for the quick fixes to my problems and actually properly work through them... and butchering half of Yharnam with a Beastcutter is a tempting thought...
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