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*flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Chameleonette on Wed Apr 23, 2014 9:15 pm

I've really had it with having my chain jerked around.

I might just give up on RP on this site and in this fetish altogether. My partners almost always disappear and usually without a word or a trace. But this isn't to say that they're inactive, no. I still see them around. They just don't communicate with me at all.

I was really happy and really excited recently that someone wanted to RP the one thing I never thought I would get the chance to, from my fave series/pairing, etc. But once again, I got ditched without a word about it.

I really don't mind if people have things to do IRL or are busy/preoccupied, not feeling up to it, want to drop the RP, or whatever reason. But please, please have at least the courtesy to tell me that! Please don't leave me hanging and waiting for weeks/months on end with no word or sign. It's incredibly rude and I'm really tired of it.

This is really disappointing. I was looking forward to it a lot. I had hoped that would change the tides on getting back into the RP swing of things, but now that's crashed.
Last edited by Chameleonette on Wed Apr 23, 2014 9:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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My RP Seeking Thread: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=35501
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby TW on Wed Apr 23, 2014 9:56 pm

Sorry to hear you are still having RP problems. Wish I could help you out. :) Actually i can if you like. Just hit me up on a PM, email or messenger. :) I'll do my best to help.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Chameleonette on Wed Apr 23, 2014 10:11 pm

TW wrote:Sorry to hear you are still having RP problems. Wish I could help you out. :) Actually i can if you like. Just hit me up on a PM, email or messenger. :) I'll do my best to help.


I appreciate the offer, but I'm not looking for general RP at the moment. The only reason I was open to RPing this last instance at all was because it was centered around a series and characters that I had been dying to do a vore RP with.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby 4ofSwords on Wed Apr 23, 2014 10:26 pm

Yup - that's the most common complaint I hear about RP here, and in general. I'd say for every 10 RPs I start, 6 end with the other person disappearing, and at least half of those are with no comment or discussion. And the numbers used to be worse.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Chameleonette on Wed Apr 23, 2014 11:47 pm

4ofSwords wrote:Yup - that's the most common complaint I hear about RP here, and in general. I'd say for every 10 RPs I start, 6 end with the other person disappearing, and at least half of those are with no comment or discussion. And the numbers used to be worse.


Yeah, it's really annoying and doesn't leave me with a whole lot of faith in the community in that respect. I would have thought it to be common courtesy. I'm guilty of dropping RPs or being slow with them, myself, but if that's the case, I tell my partner or warn them before we even start. The amount of people who don't bother to do any such thing are astounding. And some of them are repeat offenders, in that respect.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Kamelagram on Thu Apr 24, 2014 1:45 am

Yeah, I 'love' these guys too. Especially, if they ever talk to you again, they say they missed a post or their connection died and they want to continue... and then wind up doing it again. It's 100 times better to simply say this isn't what you were looking for in an RP and to back out with some dignity, but don't just leave in the middle.

The bigger slap is when people juggle multiple RPs and do simple one liners with you. I prefer RPs to be one on one, mostly cause I'm a slow typer/thinker, but even if you are quick I feel you should be keeping to one RP thread. (If there are multiple people in one RP it's cool, and obviously this doesn't apply to forum post or PM style RPs.) Is a little respect for your partner so hard to do? (Obligatory 'yes', otherwise we wouldn't have this issue.)
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby animatedfantasy on Thu Apr 24, 2014 2:16 am

Yeah I must say I've been guilty of this. I used to be really good at answering, but the last few months life has been really crazy for me. I really do mean to get into the swing of things and always say I'm going to get into things tomorrow but then my procrastination gets the best of me.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Chameleonette on Thu Apr 24, 2014 2:24 am

Kamelagram wrote:Yeah, I 'love' these guys too. Especially, if they ever talk to you again, they say they missed a post or their connection died and they want to continue... and then wind up doing it again. It's 100 times better to simply say this isn't what you were looking for in an RP and to back out with some dignity, but don't just leave in the middle.

The bigger slap is when people juggle multiple RPs and do simple one liners with you. I prefer RPs to be one on one, mostly cause I'm a slow typer/thinker, but even if you are quick I feel you should be keeping to one RP thread. (If there are multiple people in one RP it's cool, and obviously this doesn't apply to forum post or PM style RPs.) Is a little respect for your partner so hard to do? (Obligatory 'yes', otherwise we wouldn't have this issue.)


Yeah, I have a big issue with the first one. But instead of coming back weeks/months later and wanting to continue, they want to start NEW ones, instead. And then the same thing happens again. And again. And again. But yeah, I've heard every story/excuse in the book by now. I don't need the excuses. I just need SOME notice that they're going to be busy/gone for however long instead of just left stranded with a started RP.

I've never had the issue with multiple RPs. I guess in that respect, I've gotten lucky. But I don't think I'd try to do that, myself. There were a few RPs I've turned down in the past because I already had one going. I'm not good at juggling stuff like that and I like to put my all into on RP instead of keeping track of multiples. I'd only really make an exception if I knew like, one person I was RPing with was not available due to their schedule for a lot of the week or something. But otherwise... yeah, bad practice.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Chameleonette on Thu Apr 24, 2014 2:27 am

animatedfantasy wrote:Yeah I must say I've been guilty of this. I used to be really good at answering, but the last few months life has been really crazy for me. I really do mean to get into the swing of things and always say I'm going to get into things tomorrow but then my procrastination gets the best of me.


I completely understand if someone is too busy or simply doesn't have the time/not feeling up to RPing at the time. The only issue I have is when they won't tell me that at least a few days afterward. Life gets in the way for anyone, and sometimes the spark/motivation just isn't there. That's completely understandable. I just wish for more communication so I'm not left wondering what's going on or if the RP has been ditched without a word.
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My RP Seeking Thread: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=35501
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Bitter on Thu Apr 24, 2014 5:33 pm

Jesus H. Christ, a thousand times this. Sudden, inexplicable disappearance is my... well, I can't honestly say #1 pet peeve about RP in the Eka's chat, but damned if it doesn't make top three.
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Re: *flips a table*

Permanent Linkby Dark_Duran on Thu Apr 24, 2014 6:26 pm

Probably the biggest problem facing the chat is that it is not a cohesive community (and often times feels like several different communities that often sneer down their noses at each other). Because of things like the total anonymity, the ability to have dozens of 'hidden' alts, and the large, sprawling number of users that take part in it that regularly shifts as older players leave and new ones constantly come in, there is no single unifying identity to hold the whole thing together. You'd think it would be 'vore', but there is a not insignificant number of characters dedicated to doing any scenes other then vore. Because of all of this, the normal societal constructs that typically form around human interaction do not form and thus there really is no social contract in the Chat. Thus, there is nothing to discourage poor behavior.

The social contract is the primary barrier to 'rude' behavior because you can not litigate a solution to rudeness (nor should you try, what is 'rude' is often largely subjective). Normally, a community has passive ways of promoting behavior it wants to see and discouraging behavior it does not. By way of example, if a man gives generously to those in need, those around him will be more inclined to give generously to him in his time of need, whereas if he is a miser people are more likely to sit on their hands and think that 'he got what he deserved'. In this fashion, communities police themselves. The larger a community becomes, the harder it becomes for it to police itself. It is like how people say that 'country folk are friendlier then city folk'; it's not actually true. Country folk do, however, have smaller communities, thus tighter sense of community. They are better able to promote 'good' behavior and punish 'bad' behavior.

To that end, people leaving without warning happens because the chat is large and anonymous. If the chat were, say, only 25 people and a person made a habit of just leaving in the middle of a scene, then word would quickly get around, people would be disinclined to RP with the offender, and said offender would either change their ways or leave for lack of RP. Because of the raw size of the chat and the ability to hide all of one's alts if one wishes, there is no way to police things in the traditional sense. If someone wants to just leave in the middle of a scene, it's a functionally consequence-free act. Such is the way it is, sadly.
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