Telling people about your fetish.

[BuddyLayman]

Hi! So I've known that I was into macrophilia and vore my whole life. Before puberty, I used to daydream about being a shrunk friend to girls I had crushes on. When I hit puberty in jr high, I looked into giantesses on the internet and learned about the vore community. Growing up I used to feel kind of lonely as I felt like I was the only person with this fetish and if I told anyone they would be scared of/ hate me.

Well last year my best friend was moving out of state for college and we hung out and played the truth game to see if there was still anything we didn't know about each other. This was when I decided to bite the bullet and told him as this was probably this was the last time we would ever see each other face to face. When I explained to him what macrophilia and vore was, he was slightly weirded out at first but then he told me his kinks that he was into dominating women and that we just perceived the world differently and that was ok.

To this day he is the only person I ever told in real life what my fetish was and I was curious if you guys ever told about your friends and family about it and how to judge when you can and shouldn't tell someone.

[Ghrelin]

The only people who know about my kinks are my partner and people online who have either seen my art or brought up relevant discussion. Outside of that, I don't think it's really appropriate to share with anyone who didn't ask.

[Portal124]

Not a good idea, if girl expresses interest before you then yes, if good opposite sex friend express interest then yes, but as an ice breaker, with parents, relative, friends, never

[jaykayeight]

Hi!
I think its very hard to tell if anybody who is not into vore, would ever understand what its all about. But if you find yourself in the situation where you would have to explain, I guess its not always helpful to start with saying: "Its about eating people whole". Depending on your personal preferences, this would trigger wrong associations like "cannibalism" and all the things that would happen in RL like Armin Meiwes or that bathsalt-guy. Then they would block out any other information you give after that.

The only thing i found helpful explaining vore, would be to describe what it stands for you personally. This would also help them understand that it its mainly a fantasy fetish taking place just in your head. For me it would be, for example, the idea of being closer to another person than ever possible in RL.
Or to have an oral fixation is also not that far fetched, there is alot of fasciation about the mouth.

Vore is of course much more than that. There are different threads or pieces that are relatable, but I think to get the whole picture, someone needs more than just an open mind or tolerance, even if they are very close to you or even related.

I read about girlfriends making some research here because their boyfriends are into vore and they try to understand them more fully. They not only tolerate or accept it, they want to have some kind of share in the mindset. Thats really sweet but i guess they will only get some fragments of the idea, with a large portion of empathy and good will.

BUT: That makes it all the more fascinating, that there are folks that actually do share your kink, the whole thing, the full monty
And here is also the difference, that oftentimes you find those, who share your kink have other associations to vore that you also like, but havent even thought about yet.

I guess you are understood by different people on different levels. I dont think thats bad.

[BuddyLayman]

Thanks for that in depth answer!

1. Yeah I guess if I ever did want to explain myself to someone else I would explain what it means to me first. When I told my friend about it, I told him that I liked two different aspects of the fetish. The close protective feeling of it like being caressed or cuddled with someone bigger than me. I also liked the predator/prey aspect of it that's very playful (with me being the prey).

2. You tapped into something I didn't ask but was curious about too. I never really had a girlfriend for multiple reasons but yeah I've seen the girlfriends you're talking about. Which brings me to an extension of my last question. If I ever do meet someone I like, when should I tell her? Should I bring it up after a few dates or give us more time to know each other better?

[Jayezox]

You have to trust two things; the person you're telling is ok with it and won't tell anyone else. If I revealed it, I would start with a guessing game telling the person it started when I was a pre-teen when I watched "Dude: Where's My Car?" Honestly, I can't give an answer by experience, but the conversation has run through my mind before and I think that's the best way for me. I'm pretty sure even non-voraphile guys would find the vore scene in that film pretty kinky. You should reveal it with the most "normal" and relatable example of something you enjoy.

[blergle]

Friends, yes, because we talk about sex and we are all interested in psychology and we all have our own kinks. Spouse, yes, because why the hell would I marry someone I couldn't talk to about kinks. Family, just one parent because we were talking about kinks (yes we are that open) and just in passing. Really I think I am just the sort that does not associate with people who are tightasses about stuff like that. I don't care if someone tells me what they are into as long as it doesn't hurt anyone, and if they ask I have no reason to lie. Obviously I would not discuss this with mere acquaintances, co-workers or such, but I wouldn't discuss my political views with those people either.

[Artemis]

Nah. I've always considered being direct the wrong approach to being open about vore. Our fetish is a friggin' cartoon gag straight out of Tom and Jerry, as well as a horror trope from at least a dozen movies. There's simply no need to make things awkward by referring to it as anything more.

If I want to share my love of eating people, maybe I'll just roleplay a yoshi. Maybe I'll throw an actual T-Rex into the mix. If people express interest in the themes I'm using, well there you go! If people object to it, I'll ignore them and point out how stupid they're being if they persist.

Of course, that only works if you have self-restraint and aren't obviously writing with one hand.

[fixated1]

I only tell people when they ask what my fetishes are in a very genuine, serious, and kind tone and I trust them. It has to come from a place of curiosity and acceptance. Family never needs to know your sexual kinks.

[Datonenumbnuts]

I have only ever told three people in my life. Two close friends, and my best friend turned relationship partner. All of them had no problem with me liking vore. the said, everyone has a secret thing, and that doesn't change who you are as a person.
For the longest time, I was scared to share it with others out of fear of being judge horribly. telling these people took off alot of the stress i had about it deep inside.

[Kitsouille]

I have never told anyone personally/outside places like Eka's. I'm relieved to be able to talk about it and relate with some of the folks here. I don't think fetishes are meant to be shared with just anyone. It is not part of your lifestyle or your identity, it's what you fap to, more or less. Granted, just saying you're into vore is a softer method than showing a (perhaps graphic) example and giving them the need for brain bleach.

I think it is ok if people like your family finds out about it and you want to clarify that it's just a fantasy. Also ok is with friends and/or your bro if you are open to talk about sexual stuff like that. Some people stumble into stuff they are not into but still clicks on it to share it to their friend who are into it. It is also ok to tell your bf/gf.

I advise not to try but if you are not sure enough, but you can give hints. Or go straight to the point and ask people if they'd want to talk about kinks and stuff without rushing them or starting in the core subject. Tell them you'd want to talk those things, if they don't want to, they refuse, simple as that.

But that's only my opinion.

[Tril]

Everyone always, at one point, has the urge to tell someone about their fetish.

Don't.

It's just common sense once you think about it. What was once an innocent act in random movies and TV shows will always be images of you masturbating popping into their minds whenever it happens from now on.

Would you want your grandmother to take out her dentures, wink and say toothless hummers are her fetish to you? You'd never look at her the same way again. You'd ALWAYS picture her teeth popping out and her slobbery little wrinkled lips humming away on a pair of equally wrinkly testicles. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL ME, GRAM GRAM?! WHY!!

[knifesmile]

I can't say I'm either open about it or in the closet. I just sort of go about my business. I don't hide what I draw and write about, but I also don't go out of my way to advertise it. Seems the most practical route to me. *shrugs*

[Jamjo]

I guess like with sharing any kink you would first wanna know if the person is okay/comfortable with sexual stuff and to what extent, and the absolute BEST way I know to do this is steadily test the water with dirty jokes getting progressively (and of course still carefully) more extreme and see and judge their reactions. That is generally the best way I know to gauge somebody, you know?

Personally just about anyone who asked I would be okay telling cuz I'm weird like that I guess, but only one person actually knows about my love of vore. I really wish I remembered how the fuck it came up but my best friend and I were talking/texting and we were I guess getting into a sharing session and he started then I followed up on my turn saying something like, "I'm really into vore" and he asked what it was but before I could respond he looks it up and hilariously enough is all, "Well apparently so am I.."
Good shit, breh x'D
When you have reason to believe someone can handle it and you trust them, I'm personally of the opinion that you might wanna take the risk, and that's not just my open, I dont give a fuck attitude about it. If it turns out to put a strain on the relationship it simply serves to highlight a fault, and if it doesn't it can reveal a strength of it. (of course that's in reference to friends/partners and not quite family.. no clue how that works with the family dynamic what so ever)

[MirceaKitsune]

I couldn't imagine myself talking about it offline, or to people who don't at least sympathize with the idea. Then again, I have vore written on me pretty much all over the internet, so it happens whether I mention it or not

[Fantasia]

I don't really tell people (outside of the internet) about anything related to my kinks. I don't really think there's anything to be gained from it, and none of my friends or family would want to know what I find hot.

[Emi]

For me it's simple and easy. If a new "friend" apprers around me, I'm telling him/her about all my fetishes (and vore as the main one) as soon as possible. If he/she thinks it's cool, he/she stays around me and maybe becomes a true friend. If he/she says it's awful or disgusting, he/she gets kicked out from my life. This helps me avoid wasting my lifetime to useless people.

[Borealis]

I only tell those I'm in a relationship with. I see no reason for anyone else to know my sexual quirks or kinks. I don't want to know the sexual kinks, activities or anything else like that from my platonic friends of either gender either, so it's all good.

[DragonPrey3200]

I've somewhat half-assedly tried to explain vore to one of my friends once, but I never told him that I was into it, and considering his reaction to hearing what vore was: "Dude, that's disgusting. I don't wanna hear anymore.", I feel like he would be weirded out if I had told him. It may have even strained our friendship. Who knows. After that, I made the decision to never tell anyone about vore and my interest in it unless I absolutely HAVE to.(i.e. girlfriend or wife)

[Jayezox]

I've somewhat half-assedly tried to explain vore to one of my friends once, but I never told him that I was into it, and considering his reaction to hearing what vore was: "Dude, that's disgusting. I don't wanna hear anymore.", I feel like he would be weirded out if I had told him. It may have even strained our friendship. Who knows. After that, I made the decision to never tell anyone about vore and my interest in it unless I absolutely HAVE to.(i.e. girlfriend or wife)

Oh yeah, I remember talking about vore findings with friends before I even knew what it was and that was the reaction I got. Live and learn to keep these things to yourself once you get out of high school.