Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
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This section is for any artist, writer, animator, or any form of creation to share their work in order to receive comment to improve themselves better.
Read the rules in detail here
Read the Critiquing suggestion here
Please open only one thread per person. Detail here.
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Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
This is a story I started writing a year or so ago and pretty much forgot about. I'm attempting to resurrect it but could use some ideas. I MAY have shared it when I originally wrote it but I really cant remember. I apologize if thats the case.
OppaiAngel#0304 on Discord.
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OppaiAngel - Intermediate Vorarephile
- Posts: 637
- Joined: Fri Aug 17, 2012 10:09 am
- Location: USA
Re: Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
Shows promise! I like the basic premise and frankly while more prey i can at least empathize with the pred XD stupid teens.
Anyway id recommend writing a scenario for the next chapter that appeals to you the most. Whats your ideal situation? I get the feeling that you based the pred off yourself so what would you do? Once you have a basic premise id say go for it, and just make sure you go into detail about it when you do. So many worthwhile stories lose interest for me because i simply cant visualize what is written or its a line of "she ate him and he digested" sort of thing.
If youd like id send you a chapter write up i could do and you could use that as a spring board. Just pm me if youre interested.
Anyway id recommend writing a scenario for the next chapter that appeals to you the most. Whats your ideal situation? I get the feeling that you based the pred off yourself so what would you do? Once you have a basic premise id say go for it, and just make sure you go into detail about it when you do. So many worthwhile stories lose interest for me because i simply cant visualize what is written or its a line of "she ate him and he digested" sort of thing.
If youd like id send you a chapter write up i could do and you could use that as a spring board. Just pm me if youre interested.
- shortprey20
- Somewhat familiar
- Posts: 128
- Joined: Fri Feb 05, 2016 2:16 am
Re: Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
Hi, I read this and I know saying this means I'm a horrible person, but I lived in some bad places, and frankly, the reason they were such bad places was because of the bad people who lived there.
Plenty of the neighbors were nice and I wouldn't want to see anything bad happen to them, and some were only minor trouble and small mischief and not all that often, so, of course, not everyone in that neighborhood were bad people, but the ones who were causing big problems seemed like they were getting some evil pleasure out of making life miserable for everyone around them. I felt bad for my good neighbors.
Call me a flawed person, sorry, but sometimes I wish Tara was in some of those places so there would only be nice people around. Terrible thing to say, heartless, I know, sorry, but I'm having too much fun imagining this, so I watched you because I want to see what happens next.
Plenty of the neighbors were nice and I wouldn't want to see anything bad happen to them, and some were only minor trouble and small mischief and not all that often, so, of course, not everyone in that neighborhood were bad people, but the ones who were causing big problems seemed like they were getting some evil pleasure out of making life miserable for everyone around them. I felt bad for my good neighbors.
Call me a flawed person, sorry, but sometimes I wish Tara was in some of those places so there would only be nice people around. Terrible thing to say, heartless, I know, sorry, but I'm having too much fun imagining this, so I watched you because I want to see what happens next.
- Tassie
- Participator
- Posts: 246
- Joined: Thu Mar 13, 2014 12:05 am
Re: Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
shortprey20 wrote:Shows promise! I like the basic premise and frankly while more prey i can at least empathize with the pred XD stupid teens.
Anyway id recommend writing a scenario for the next chapter that appeals to you the most. Whats your ideal situation? I get the feeling that you based the pred off yourself so what would you do? Once you have a basic premise id say go for it, and just make sure you go into detail about it when you do. So many worthwhile stories lose interest for me because i simply cant visualize what is written or its a line of "she ate him and he digested" sort of thing.
If youd like id send you a chapter write up i could do and you could use that as a spring board. Just pm me if youre interested.
I think I have an idea for the next chapter. I just need to get it written out and make sure I have enough detail. Thanks for the feedback!
OppaiAngel#0304 on Discord.
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OppaiAngel - Intermediate Vorarephile
- Posts: 637
- Joined: Fri Aug 17, 2012 10:09 am
- Location: USA
Re: Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
Tassie wrote:Hi, I read this and I know saying this means I'm a horrible person, but I lived in some bad places, and frankly, the reason they were such bad places was because of the bad people who lived there.
Plenty of the neighbors were nice and I wouldn't want to see anything bad happen to them, and some were only minor trouble and small mischief and not all that often, so, of course, not everyone in that neighborhood were bad people, but the ones who were causing big problems seemed like they were getting some evil pleasure out of making life miserable for everyone around them. I felt bad for my good neighbors.
Call me a flawed person, sorry, but sometimes I wish Tara was in some of those places so there would only be nice people around. Terrible thing to say, heartless, I know, sorry, but I'm having too much fun imagining this, so I watched you because I want to see what happens next.
Glad you liked it. Check out my other stories in my album as well
OppaiAngel#0304 on Discord.
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OppaiAngel - Intermediate Vorarephile
- Posts: 637
- Joined: Fri Aug 17, 2012 10:09 am
- Location: USA
Re: Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
After some thought, I think I might be going with a "Purge" kind of theme for the rest of this story. Had a Purge marathon with the hubs yesterday, lol. I think it might be interesting to throw some Vore into the mix
OppaiAngel#0304 on Discord.
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OppaiAngel - Intermediate Vorarephile
- Posts: 637
- Joined: Fri Aug 17, 2012 10:09 am
- Location: USA
Re: Story: Tara's Adventures (WIP)
So far so intriguing!
I think you're on the right track. I'm certainly interested to see what happens in Chapter Two.
If you need some help with the copy editing (typos/grammar fixes), I'd be happy to help out.
I think you're on the right track. I'm certainly interested to see what happens in Chapter Two.
If you need some help with the copy editing (typos/grammar fixes), I'd be happy to help out.
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Scrumptious - Intermediate Vorarephile
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- Joined: Tue Jun 14, 2011 2:05 pm
7 posts
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