Writer's Critique Corner

[MarinLaFey]

Hello there writers of Eka's Portal. I decided to create this little thread because of a few problems I think we as writers run into.

We don't get much critique here. And maybe we might not even need it. I mean as long as we write "Freddie's grand cock gaped open and gulped down the party goers." Or "Rachel unhinged her jaw and engulfed Eric who had been tressed up as the Thanksgiving turkey." we will have fans. As long as we appeal to our niche and our audience. But I think as writers we need to help each other out.

So I decided that we should have a personal critique corner. Because writers fill a special niche here on Ekas. Our readers give us a chance. They decide to read our stories. I think we owe it to ourselves and them to write the best stories we can.

So, post stories you need help with or come to just discuss ideas you have and wanna talk out. Or just come to talk writer things.

[TinyMouse]

I'd really love if someone could give this piece (macro/micro, M/F soft vore with implied digestion) a critique. I wrote it a year ago and have since churned out more content on and offsite, but I'd really love to see if there's anything I can improve on for future pieces. <3

[Brazzel]

I love this idea! I'll keep an eye on this thread.

[Tassie]

When the writer's group fell apart, I was very sad. it was very good to keep me writing instead of being always busy with other things. With school in season, there's could be some free time.

[calldahotline]

I'd love some critique on this piece.

https://aryion.com/g4/view/474628

Features F/m, willing, giantess, endo, as well as character focus, nerdy references (I hid four references to other books, props to whoever recognizes all four, only one real vore scene, and a cheezey ending. It's not only my first vore piece, but my first piece of writing that I really shared with anyone.

[Slayerhero90]

i have no idea when i'm gonna be putting stuff out again but i might as well keep tabs on this

[EmissaryOfRainbows]

Some feedback on my stuff would be nice! https://aryion.com/g4/view/478807

This one's my most recent, just be sure to read the tags first to see if it's something you're interested in.

[Elpie]

i'm also sometimes concerned that what i write and upload here might not be up to snuff--part of it is simply because it's vore hentai and there's only so many different ways you can write out how characters have sex (or, indeed, how a woman may swallow someone as big as she is). i'll have to remember to come back here and put out some critique requests; been meaning to do some new rewrites of older chapters, anyway, so maybe that'll be my opportunity (i want to write in accents for some of the characters as demonstrations of the translation convention, since the characters are Japanese but the story is written in English, and to change up the setting just slightly to establish for myself that it takes place in the same universe as another writing project of mine that i'll never upload here)

[shhhyoudontknowme]

Critique thread? Awesome! Here's something I've been working on.

Spoiler: show

As soon as the chef opened the oven door, the kitchen was flooded with the aroma of a freshly roasted girl. The tray, which contained a meat girl formerly known as Amber, was carefully slid out of the oven and placed onto a serving cart. Two other girls, Janelle and Vanessa, were already fully prepared in their own trays, and were waiting for their turn in the oven. Normally, all three girls would have roasted at the same time in separate ovens, but the other two ovens were down for scheduled maintenance. It wasn’t common for three girls to be ordered back to back at this time of year, but fortunately, the girls enjoyed the chance to watch each other cook.

Janelle was hog-tied on her stomach, and her head was less than a few feet away from the cart that Amber was on. The smells drove her crazy, and she imagined being the one to eat her. She fantasized about the girl’s cooked pussy, and in her mind, she thought about what it would taste like. She imagined taking a knife and sliding it underneath Amber’s breast, letting the fatty lump slide onto her plate for her to enjoy. Saliva dripped into her tray as she drooled from behind the apple in her mouth, and a similar puddle began forming between her legs.

Vanessa, who was on her back with her legs spread wide, was having similar thoughts as she squirmed in her pan. Her eyes fixated on Janelle, imagining how she would look in the oven, with the heat turning her skin to a delicious shade of brown like Amber’s. Though she was eager for her own time in the oven, she was excited when she saw the chef begin to slide Janelle’s tray into the oven. The now roasting girl moaned as loudly as she could with the apple in her mouth. The sound was cut short by the closing of the soundproof oven door.

Janelle watched through the glass door of the oven as Amber was wheeled through the doors leading to the restaurant’s dining area. The heat inside the oven was immense, almost too much for Janelle to take. She enjoyed the oven, however, continuously moaning in pleasure as the heat enveloped her. She desperately wished her hands were free, however, just so she could play with herself one more time. Vanessa had the same wish, as she watched Janelle cook and waited eagerly for her turn.

The chef returned about fifteen minutes later with an empty cart. Vanessa tried to imagine the customers that were now eating the roasted Amber. She glanced over at Janelle, who was starting to have trouble keeping her eyes open. Her moans slowly died down as she slowly became a piece of roasted meat, dreaming of what it would be like to be on that table.

In less than an hour, the chef took a roasted Janelle out of the oven and placed her onto the cart. The former meat girl was wheeled over towards the door, where she would wait for a moment as the chef came back to place Vanessa into the oven. Vanessa was the most excited of the three. It was extremely rare for any girls from the lobster tank to watch another girl roast unless it was from inside another oven, yet she got to watch both of her friends be turned into beautiful pieces of roast femme. The meat girl squealed with ecstasy as the heat from the oven began to envelop her. Through the glass of the door, she watched as Janelle was wheeled through the kitchen doors.

Even though she had only been roasting for less than five minutes, Vanessa felt like she had been in the oven for hours. She thought about what she looked like from the outside, wishing her friends could have watched her cook. She was somewhat able to see her own reflection in the oven door, though the light from outside made it difficult. Still, she could see how beautiful she looked with her legs spread open and bound. She tried to pick her head up to look down at herself, but her neck had already started to grow weak. Instead, she laid back and closed her eyes, imagining herself on the table already. She imagined the customers telling her how beautiful she looked as they carved into her pussy, and how delicious she was as they bit into her breast meat.

Unfinished, but it's what I have. It was supposed to go along with an image that I never finished.

[Speedyblupi]

I like giving a good critique of stories I like - it helps the authors write better stories, which means I'll enjoy them more, and can help the authors to become more popular. I don't get why more people don't do it - I'm often interested in seeing what other people think of a story that I like or dislike, beyond an upvote or downvote.

I only really like feral stuff though, so there aren't that many fics that I'd want to read to give a critique of.

[Elpie]

I like giving a good critique of stories I like - it helps the authors write better stories, which means I'll enjoy them more, and can help the authors to become more popular. I don't get why more people don't do it - I'm often interested in seeing what other people think of a story that I like or dislike, beyond an upvote or downvote.

i think most people here on Eka's operate on the unspoken rule of "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all". i know that i myself just move on if i find something i don't like in the various galleries rather than flaming people. kinda helps and hurts, since usually no one gets offended but it also means there's little to no constructive criticism, either. makes this critique thread all the more important.