Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

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Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

Postby spanxthanx » Mon Jan 21, 2019 11:36 am

I really have no luck as a writer, I keep writing the first chapter of many stories and they aren't all that good. When Stephen King picks up vore I'm gonna stop writing and start reading. Anyway, for what it's worth I wrote a really short story:

https://drive.google.com/open?id=1Ql3Hq ... WiI1NZ9adv

Everything above is before the edit

I think there would be too many threads if each chapter was it's own thread, especially since these are rather short chapters.

https://drive.google.com/open?id=15ceF8 ... NwmqWrGQZ1
Last edited by spanxthanx on Fri Jan 25, 2019 10:13 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Little Trouble F/f

Postby Wolfsage » Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:09 am

I really liked it, I can't wait for the next chapter.
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Re: Little Trouble F/f

Postby spanxthanx » Tue Jan 22, 2019 12:49 pm

I'm glad you liked it.
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Re: Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

Postby Wolfsage » Fri Jan 25, 2019 3:24 pm

Great, Chapter 2 is out.
So good!
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Re: Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

Postby Whereaminow27 » Fri Jan 25, 2019 10:16 pm

I hope she gets out of her stomach, and gives her a taste of her own medicine.

And see how she likes it. ^^
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Re: Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

Postby spanxthanx » Mon Jan 28, 2019 10:47 am

Thanks everybody for reading.

Was anybody surprised about Isabelle? Or did I properly foreshadow that she might be different?

Are the characters properly fleshed out? Maybe there's a balance to be struck out between depth and action. Often times people don't care about the victim, it's just a random piece of flesh.
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Re: Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

Postby Wolfsage » Wed Jan 30, 2019 7:52 am

spanxthanx wrote:Thanks everybody for reading.

Was anybody surprised about Isabelle? Or did I properly foreshadow that she might be different?

Are the characters properly fleshed out? Maybe there's a balance to be struck out between depth and action. Often times people don't care about the victim, it's just a random piece of flesh.

This is just a personal thing for me, but I tend to describe the characters involved in the story, so that people will have a better understanding of what I imagine the characters to like. But that is just me. Other prefers to leave that up to the reader. But i'm curious to see what is gonna happen next? Is she gonna survive, or not.
Last edited by Wolfsage on Thu Jan 31, 2019 8:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Little Trouble F/f + Chapter 2

Postby spanxthanx » Wed Jan 30, 2019 10:43 am

Is she gonna survive, or not.

Did you read the end of chapter 2?

About describing characters, I've heard that it's a good idea not to get into details unless it either affects the story or it's a romance novel. The flip side of that is that the story has to make use of the physical traits of the characters, like strength or reach or speed and so forth. I think you're right that it's important to describe what traits the characters like.

Btw, I don't know what's gonna happen next because I'm more of a discovery writer than an outliner. I have some ideas but I'm worried that the writing is rather low quality, I don't know exactly what it is but I'm afraid it could be better. Perhaps I haven't established the scene properly, but then again most people probably don't want to read 30 pages before they get to the action. Anyway, I look forward to see what happens next.
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