Looking for ANY feedback, still new to this

[ActualAlisterWilde]

So I'm a pretty new writer, started properly around November last year and it was really because I always like the idea of being a writer, I passed English well and hopefully I can achieve this distant goal as a result. Problem is I'm new to writing fetish or themed stuff. So I would really apricate any and all feedback, good or bad. I have a small range at the moment but I have outlines for nearly a hundred stories/parts for different things in the planning phase and about ten in the writing phase. So fresh content is always on the way!

I could really do with feedback though and support through favs and watches is also loved ^^

Here is the start of the Skyrim series:
https://aryion.com/g4/view/634453

Here's My favourite part of the Skyrim Series:
https://aryion.com/g4/view/636029

This was an Rp I did with a friend to do with the Dorito Advert from a while ago
https://aryion.com/g4/view/658138

Heres a (So far Non-vore) start to a series set in a world I'm currently making:
https://aryion.com/g4/view/656069

Any questions please PM me, I love a good chat X3

[TheWildeWood]

I skimmed over the start of your Skyrim series and it's a fine first draft. You've even got a positive comment on it too, which I bet is satisfying! I think your biggest hurdle is that classic "show, don't tell" issue. "The sun was nice and warm for a cold Skyrim afternoon." is a great example, how was the sun's warm nice, or how did the disparity in temperatures feel? When you go back through your work, ask yourself if there is a better way to convey the story.