Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye candy.

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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby four_fleets » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:56 pm

xionzappa wrote:Their first post was a compliment to you. Your first post was an insult to them. Yes, alright, so they're not quite on your level of writing and yes, perhaps you wouldn't enjoy an RP with them, but there are way more polite ways to go about saying no. And the public shaming really doesn't help.



2016-03-25 06:11:42 [Pantone -> Wrestler] Can I quote you anonymously?
2016-03-25 06:15:05 [Wrestler -> Pantone] you can take my name also for it


I would've left it private if he didn't say that.

Clarifying something. I gave him a shot before- even started two scenes. Seven sentence paragraph starter, other guy ignored it entirely and posted single-sentence with half-formed "Eat Me" sentence. At this point I'd asked him not to message me on SEVEN characters. It's either this, or I ask the Admins to make a more abrasive decision on the matter.

Otherwise, I simply wanted the forum thread as a locked example archived. Didn't think I'd be waking up to it.
  I wonder if you'll visit This thread?  



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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby CakeInferno » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:57 pm

A bit torn between two sides on this subject. Having spent a decent amount of time inside the chatroom I'm familiar with these kind of approaches, which often leave me worried about the other person's mental state. Usually I try to close these conversations as soon as possible because I can't get rid of the uncomfortable feeling that there's a minor sitting at the other end of the PC.

However, it doesn't show a great amount of moral integrity to trick a person like this and publically shame them for their lack of intelligence. This could've been avoided by simply keeping Wrestler anonymous. I know that this topic's main intention was likely just to expose the lack of mental ability that you're confronted with inside the chat on a daily base, and I'd agree to that part. But there's also a deficit of ethics to find here, which lets me conclude that this topic neither does yourself, nor Wrestler a favor.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby SorryNo » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:06 pm

four_fleets wrote:Clarifying something. I gave him a shot before- even started two scenes. Seven sentence paragraph starter, other guy ignored it entirely and posted single-sentence with half-formed "Eat Me" sentence. At this point I'd asked him not to message me on SEVEN characters. It's either this, or I ask the Admins to make a more abrasive decision on the matter.

Otherwise, I simply wanted the forum thread as a locked example archived. Didn't think I'd be waking up to it.


An example of what? How to be unreasonably annoyed over nothing? How to overreact to something that is commonplace? Say no to them and end it there instead of being an angry child.

Besides, just what do you expect the admins to do? Bend to your whim and punish people who don't meet your standards? People in those kinds of chatrooms don't always speak the best english, aren't always the most eloquent, aren't always the most thoughtful. Everyone deals with it and so should you.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby BlueBlaze » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:09 pm

Yeah, some people are there just to jerk off. I think a lot of us are but there are people who need more of a build up than others. Story, character development and plot goes a long way for folks. After that sex would be the cherry on top. However; if two people just want to skip all of that and just have sex or just skip to a vorish session It's still all well and good too. People just have different prerogatives.

Edit: Apparently the person didn't mind being shamed.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Vidofinir » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:57 pm

The issue I've seen with this guy is, he seems to go BEYOND the 'only wants a quick fap' type, and just... makes no sense.

He's messages tons of my characters on tons of his alts (too many to ignore, for the record), and I've told him in and out of character "No, I don't want to roleplay" in no uncertain terms, harsh and not, etc. Before that, out of boredom, I'd TRIED to indulge him, and... he can't even make up his mind whether he's willing, unwilling, threatening to shoot me, or begging me to abuse him.

I mean, this isn't a matter of 'doesn't speak english well', it's... not even trying. I've played with lots of people who aren't the best english speakers, and sometimes it leads to really damn good scenes. But with this guy it's a matter of sheer disrespect, and from what I've seen, borderline harassment. I've rejected the guy before, DOZENS of times, and have an inbox with about 50 PUBs from him, as recent as last night (which don't seem to be blockable, by the way)...

So, just my two cents. Seems somewhere above this topic might've become a flurry of people coming to his defense and trying to shame the OP, despite the fact that they got permission to post and make a damn good point, so... take it or leave it, but I agree with them completely. Can't do a lot with difficult roleplayers like these, sadly, but venting about them seems perfectly valid, even if not particularly constructive.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby quirkylilme » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:23 pm

Having dealt with a handful of people that borderline on this kind of behavior, I'd say the OP is in the right with posting this. OP made it very clear to Wrestler that her information would be shared and went through all the proper channels with the admins before making the thread.

That being said, there needs to be a way to block people on your various characters. All this does is allow for constant, unwarranted harassment from, well...anybody. This being a prime example of being unable to avoid unwanted, constant attention from somebody who doesn't even seem to be trying. Not trying and just not hitting it off, but doing something that seems to be almost on the verge of trolling.

Just my two cents, anyway. :v
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby hax » Fri Mar 25, 2016 2:34 pm

I'm not particularly in defense of Wrestler's behavior, but I feel like the description of sexual acts themselves matter more to a large enough chunk of this community than the partners involved. We are literally in a fetish community with members who will settle for art of characters we are not attracted to, in gender and other factors of our and orientation, so long as the sexual acts being performed are enticing. It's common enough to find gallery comments where users go out of their way to state that a picture does not align with their preferences before complimenting the quality of the art or the scenario as attractive. If I'm looking for casual erotic roleplay, I typically scan preferences before character descriptions and try to drum up scenarios a partner might appreciate. Wrestler's first mistake was even bringing up your character without having very much to say.

Additionally, a lot of prey are used to their pred being the more active partner in art and personal fantasies. It's very easy to see prey as being reduced to an object or means, they are having things done to them and not the other way around. I'm actually a switch when it comes to roleplay (it's some crazy meta-fappery bullshit based on who's currently online), and have enjoyed "putting on a show" for my prey with little-to-no response on their end. However, I completely understand how other predators can get fed up with prey who don't do anything.

Wrestler's chat etiquette and sexual culture of persistence is the real problem. Aside from perhaps basic grammar and understanding, post length and roleplay pacing is a subjective matter of preference and not of objective "quality" or "standards." You should certainly feel disrespected, but I don't think people caring about characters or not is a universal concern.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby AFieldMouse » Fri Mar 25, 2016 3:51 pm

It seems like this is a problem that plagues female characters more than their male counterparts, which makes sense I guess. Still makes me glad that I'm playing a male character.

Funnily enough I'm guilty of looking at picture first, then preferences, then profile content. Granted the picture is often the first thing you see when you open a profile.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Doku » Fri Mar 25, 2016 3:59 pm

Radijs wrote:Or you know, maybe there's a lot of people on the chat room who are there just to typefuck and don't give a crap about a six chapter history that they're going to forget about the moment they get their rocks off.

It's a PORN CHATROOM after all. Not the Oxford university for english literature.


Except that it wasn't a six chapter history. It was 3 short paragraphs that included the player's preferences and wants.

So, if he doesn't give a crap and just wants to spam his rocks off at her, then what is she? His fap bait, and not another player? Yeah, I'm not getting on board with supporting that attitude.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby rugli » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:04 pm

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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Doku » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:05 pm

SorryNo wrote:
four_fleets wrote:Clarifying something. I gave him a shot before- even started two scenes. Seven sentence paragraph starter, other guy ignored it entirely and posted single-sentence with half-formed "Eat Me" sentence. At this point I'd asked him not to message me on SEVEN characters. It's either this, or I ask the Admins to make a more abrasive decision on the matter.

Otherwise, I simply wanted the forum thread as a locked example archived. Didn't think I'd be waking up to it.


An example of what? How to be unreasonably annoyed over nothing? How to overreact to something that is commonplace? Say no to them and end it there instead of being an angry child.

Besides, just what do you expect the admins to do? Bend to your whim and punish people who don't meet your standards? People in those kinds of chatrooms don't always speak the best english, aren't always the most eloquent, aren't always the most thoughtful. Everyone deals with it and so should you.


Actually, I'm going to raise a hand and say that no. If she's experienced repeated, unfulfilling, pushy and demanding scenarios and been harassed by multiple accounts by the same person, then no. She's not unreasonable in being annoyed at this. Those are the rules of the boards. You do not use alts to harass people who don't get down on their hands and knees and do what you pester them for.

I know. I've been harassed in the chat before by someone who was infinitely more aggressive than this and downright creepy. If he doesn't take 'no,' which if she's being clear and honest here as she says she's had to tell him no on several different characters, then he's pretty obviously not taking the hint. If he harasses her over it, then the mods can and will issue warnings, citations, temp bans and permanent bans. The whole "I've had to push him away several times in the past and I gave him a shot once or twice before" took this into another category.

Because 7 different alts and repeatedly not taking the hint is well beyond ESL issues, which I suspect he also has. If it were just that, it would be forgivable. This is beyond that.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Doku » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:07 pm

AFieldMouse wrote:It seems like this is a problem that plagues female characters more than their male counterparts, which makes sense I guess. Still makes me glad that I'm playing a male character.


As a man who people have, for some cockamamie reason, mistaken for a woman repeatedly, I can say that it absolutely happens more often if the other person thinks you're a girl. I never get harassed as Leafio or Judas a tenth as much as I do as Abrienda or Samantha, and I know from past conversations that women who are openly women on the boards as players have it worse.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby FlareRocker » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:08 pm

I don't believe that the thread was a direct attack, but still. Definitely agree with the main statement though; it could've been handled better.

Your character profile was also very scattered and not exactly at the most descriptive, but neither is mine.

In short, we need to just leave it at that, hopefully not attack the poor fellow again(even though they blantantly gave you permission). Just, in the end, please make some guide lines on your character.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Delet932b4sk » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:14 pm

I have to agree with Latroma here. There's such a thing as taking it too far, not that I have much sympathy for the guy either, since he's also bothered me (and subsequently been muted) across 5 alts, along with the aforementioned quality issues. One of the rules I have is that the moment someone makes it clear they haven't read my profile or preferences, and has just approached me based on a picture (or one sentence), they're out the door without a warning. If you can't be assed to read the profile that I put time and effort into making interesting (even if it's just to me, since that's not an objective statement) or at least going through bullet points or reading the handily included TL;DR I include on a lot of my newer profiles, then I can't be assed to let you know you're getting shot down.

There aren't a lot of RP feels worse to me than spending two or more hours on a profile's writeup only to be more or less ignored. I dislike even including pictures because usually that just attracts more shitplayers. It might sound harsh, but that's my thought on it. I don't see anything wrong with this thread.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby FlareRocker » Fri Mar 25, 2016 4:33 pm

Speaking of which, on the part of cognitive description. It could be that they were on medication, new to English, or just didn't try at all. My constant exposure to medication has "dumbed" me down quiet a lot, in which it is hard for me to mutter a single phrase in fluent English, but if that is the case, they probably shouldn't be roleplaying. It could also be that they are illegally on the site and they are underage, knowing my history with this occurrence of underage roleplayers(not exactly from this site), it is definitely a probability.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby AFieldMouse » Fri Mar 25, 2016 5:46 pm

I dislike even including pictures because usually that just attracts more shitplayers. It might sound harsh, but that's my thought on it. I don't see anything wrong with this thread.


It seems a lot of people won't bite profiles that are text only, (Once again guilty myself.) it's a sad fact, but a trend I've noticed none-the-less. Having SFW pictures seems to help mitigate the worst of the player-base though...
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby FlareRocker » Fri Mar 25, 2016 6:17 pm

AFieldMouse wrote:
I dislike even including pictures because usually that just attracts more shitplayers. It might sound harsh, but that's my thought on it. I don't see anything wrong with this thread.


It seems a lot of people won't bite profiles that are text only, (Once again guilty myself.) it's a sad fact, but a trend I've noticed none-the-less. Having SFW pictures seems to help mitigate the worst of the player-base though...


Unfortunately, I won't be able to get a picture of my character until I commission someone for her. Not that you were talking to me.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby AlluringPredation » Fri Mar 25, 2016 6:39 pm

Image

I know of many characters who get no love, but are FANTASTIC players with well constructed profiles. Then have started up a new character with nothing but a little text and a sexy pic, and get the attention of a player they always wanted. When shallowness is to one's benefit, there's little complaint, but the moment people attract someone undesirable is there grumbling. Sure uncouth things were said, but such things were never discouraged from the onset, at least not on the level he understands, direct. When you look at the profile with the picture attached and not much else, of course people are going to get a hard-on for you character and behave appropriately, what indication do you want more? There's absolutely nothing about the characters personality, or the players personal preferences, the only thing that CAN be done is throw out a line and hope your prefs match. I don't see four_fleets outright refusing, to me it feels like it's a bait, keeping him on the line for as long as possible for ammo... Curious about the omitted bits of the conversation as well.

I've been harassed in the past personally, and it was not fun at all, by some who were relentless in their pursuit despite my objections. Yet when it's a matter that potentially could have been settled with a simple 'No' I have no sympathy for you. I've encountered him a few times and I've always given a direct but polite no. Sometimes explaining in short our characters wouldn't fit. Every time he's left me alone after graciously. Sure he's approached multiple characters of mine, but I don't keep an altlist, and he obviously isn't psychic or a chat admin/mod, so I can't blame him for not knowing.

Also, don't be surprised when you post a matter to a message board to find the topic being discussed. That's the whole point of a message board, isn't it?
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Indighost » Fri Mar 25, 2016 6:50 pm

I have to agree that this needs to be said. Some people need to be made aware that reading character profiles is vital to a good roleplay.
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Re: Why you should read profiles instead of oggling eye cand

Postby Doku » Fri Mar 25, 2016 7:37 pm

AlluringPredation,

The fault of a poor player caring nothing for the wishes or interests of a person does not fall on the person being mistreated by the poor player. It falls on the person doing the mistreating. To say the reverse is closely akin to saying "If you didn't want the attention, you shouldn't dress provocatively" to a person for dressing in good clothes. And before you attempt the caveat 'that wasn't my intent,' I would remind you that part of your "Point" was to show off the image from the character's profile, as if they had done something wrong in choosing an attractive image.

I have heard it said as a defense here that the person in question may have been ESL. Personally, I think that we should divorce ourselves from the individual themselves, as they are merely an example, a symptom of broader issues that DO pervade the chat and boards. But, I think it's pretty clear he is ESL.

It's also clear that he had no intention of doing anything other than reacting to the image posted.
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