God Complex: Vore; RPG game. <September update>

[salamoun]

I also saw a third princess in the picture in the file, but I didn't find her in the game. Did I not trigger something? I'm sorry for my poor English

Not in this version yet, you didn't miss anything.

[AllmightyImortal]

Not sure if this question was asked yet but who is all recruitable?

[frogcubus]

I don't have a lot to contribute to the topic, but I wanted to thank you, Salamoun, for your efforts on this. Vore content included, and even without, this has been fun.

As a wise man once said in entirely different context, I will be watching your career with great interest.

[salamoun]

Not sure if this question was asked yet but who is all recruitable?

In the current version: Mila (fairy), Reila (naga) and Bel (succubus)

[8th Demon]

Not sure if this question was asked yet but who is all recruitable?

In the current version: Mila (fairy), Reila (naga) and Bel (succubus)

Can't you still recruit Ashley the minotaur too?

[Urielzael2]

Salamoun just forgot to write her down. Ashley is still recruitable. And she always will be.

[salamoun]

Not sure if this question was asked yet but who is all recruitable?

In the current version: Mila (fairy), Reila (naga) and Bel (succubus)

Can't you still recruit Ashley the minotaur too?

Right, completely forgot about her, sorry. Yes Ashley is the 4th one recruitable right now.

[Stiff]

Who wrote the scenes in the Grandhol brothel? They're...markedly different from the rest of the game. That's pretty much my only gripe - I'm a big fan of being restarted every time you get digested rather than seeing a game over. Saves a lot of time.

[JAIDEN2207]

How old is your avatar and how old will your adopted childten be?

[JAIDEN2207]

How old is your avatar and how old will your adopted childten be?

I meant your avatar as in the avatar that you get when you start the game

[BardicLasher]

Who wrote the scenes in the Grandhol brothel? They're...markedly different from the rest of the game. That's pretty much my only gripe - I'm a big fan of being restarted every time you get digested rather than seeing a game over. Saves a lot of time.

I noticed this too. They've got different tense usage than most of the rest of the game and it's weird and awkward. Could definitely use another editing pass.

[Urielzael2]

Who wrote the scenes in the Grandhol brothel? They're...markedly different from the rest of the game. That's pretty much my only gripe - I'm a big fan of being restarted every time you get digested rather than seeing a game over. Saves a lot of time.

I noticed this too. They've got different tense usage than most of the rest of the game and it's weird and awkward. Could definitely use another editing pass.

I am the one who have written brothel and several other scenes. All has been checked by native english speaker. I'm sorry that I was not able to satisfy your desires for good writting. I hope you enjoy rest of game where some of my dialogues are better. Have a nice day.

[Anonim1234]

Hi Salamoun whether winter update? If Yes then which month is planned?

[DroolingPred]

I loaded up a save to play through the brothel scenes. I remembered them being sort of "off", but couldn't place it beyond one thing.

"Fruit" is an appropriate plural, so "fruits" reads strangely. The word "fruits" can be used to describe multiple kinds of fruit, but I would suggest referring directly to berries.

Then I started writing this post and replaying the scenes, and noticed some other stuff I would suggest changing. Constructive critique time!
-----

Details on Kotel's scene
When she returns to the room, it reads "Neko would quickly return with large bottle of milk and a huge goblet of fruits."
Suggested change: "The Neko returns to the room with a large bottle of milk and a goblet filled with fruit."
The biggest flaw in this sentence is the lack of articles for Neko and bottle.

"Kotel would only smile more warmly. She would start snuggling to you in..."
Suggested change: "Kotel smiles more warmly. She starts snuggling up to you..."
The use of "would" suggests future tense or suggested action. This interaction should use present tense.

Question asked to Kotel - "why can't you cannot drink alcohol?"
Remove the "cannot".

"Well Basically I have some alcohol problems. When I drink even a little I become more aggressive, dominative, and easy to piss off."
Basically is incorrectly capitalized. Dominative isn't a word, use "dominating".

I may go back through the other dialog options later if you would like further assistance with reviewing the scene.

-----
Erufu
"Sit or lay down on the bed and leave the rest on me"
Correct "on me" to "to me".

"Ok now that we have some privacy"
Erufu's character is really sexy. "Ok" is a sort of filler word that's mostly used when you're uncertain to reaffirm yourself. Just remove the "Ok" and the line will better fit the fantasy of the scene.

If you ask "Why" about her name, she will eventually say "I didn't mean to be mad on you"
This should be "get mad at you", or "didn't mean to snap at you"

Same line "as an apologize" should be "as an apology". Apologize is the verb form, so you would use it as an action such as "let me apologize", whereas apology is the noun, used such as "you owe me an apology".

Further into the scene, "Bra and Panties of Erufu's" should be "Erufu's bra and panties". You could also say "Erufu's undergarments", or "the thin strips of cloth obscuring Erufu's lovely breasts". The current wording reads in a clunky way and is haphazardly capitalized.

"Erufu would wink and move to strip you further"
"Erufu winks and continues to strip you."

"mushed a lot of peoples in there"
Changed to "people", it's already plural.

There are a few other minor issues with tense and plurality in the scene, but overall I quite liked Erufu's scene. Perhaps because Mirai's dialog is a bit annoying and Kotel's scene is not my preferred type of vore.
-----

That's all I'm in the mood to review for the time being. I've already digested the harpy in this playthrough, so I can't review that scene. I hope this critique is more useful than it is aggressive. I really appreciate the amount of work that has gone into the game.

[salamoun]

How old is your avatar and how old will your adopted childten be?

I meant your avatar as in the avatar that you get when you start the game

The player character is 21 years old during the playthrough, the kids you adopt between 10-13 years I guess.

Who wrote the scenes in the Grandhol brothel? They're...markedly different from the rest of the game. That's pretty much my only gripe - I'm a big fan of being restarted every time you get digested rather than seeing a game over. Saves a lot of time.

I noticed this too. They've got different tense usage than most of the rest of the game and it's weird and awkward. Could definitely use another editing pass.

Yea, all brothel scenes are written by Urielzael2 and are yet to be properly spellchecked as it's a lot of text and we're quite busy to update it.

I loaded up a save to play through the brothel scenes. I remembered them being sort of "off", but couldn't place it beyond one thing.

"Fruit" is an appropriate plural, so "fruits" reads strangely. The word "fruits" can be used to describe multiple kinds of fruit, but I would suggest referring directly to berries.

Then I started writing this post and replaying the scenes, and noticed some other stuff I would suggest changing. Constructive critique time!
-----

Details on Kotel's scene
When she returns to the room, it reads "Neko would quickly return with large bottle of milk and a huge goblet of fruits."
Suggested change: "The Neko returns to the room with a large bottle of milk and a goblet filled with fruit."
The biggest flaw in this sentence is the lack of articles for Neko and bottle.

"Kotel would only smile more warmly. She would start snuggling to you in..."
Suggested change: "Kotel smiles more warmly. She starts snuggling up to you..."
The use of "would" suggests future tense or suggested action. This interaction should use present tense.

Question asked to Kotel - "why can't you cannot drink alcohol?"
Remove the "cannot".

"Well Basically I have some alcohol problems. When I drink even a little I become more aggressive, dominative, and easy to piss off."
Basically is incorrectly capitalized. Dominative isn't a word, use "dominating".

I may go back through the other dialog options later if you would like further assistance with reviewing the scene.

-----
Erufu
"Sit or lay down on the bed and leave the rest on me"
Correct "on me" to "to me".

"Ok now that we have some privacy"
Erufu's character is really sexy. "Ok" is a sort of filler word that's mostly used when you're uncertain to reaffirm yourself. Just remove the "Ok" and the line will better fit the fantasy of the scene.

If you ask "Why" about her name, she will eventually say "I didn't mean to be mad on you"
This should be "get mad at you", or "didn't mean to snap at you"

Same line "as an apologize" should be "as an apology". Apologize is the verb form, so you would use it as an action such as "let me apologize", whereas apology is the noun, used such as "you owe me an apology".

Further into the scene, "Bra and Panties of Erufu's" should be "Erufu's bra and panties". You could also say "Erufu's undergarments", or "the thin strips of cloth obscuring Erufu's lovely breasts". The current wording reads in a clunky way and is haphazardly capitalized.

"Erufu would wink and move to strip you further"
"Erufu winks and continues to strip you."

"mushed a lot of peoples in there"
Changed to "people", it's already plural.

There are a few other minor issues with tense and plurality in the scene, but overall I quite liked Erufu's scene. Perhaps because Mirai's dialog is a bit annoying and Kotel's scene is not my preferred type of vore.
-----

That's all I'm in the mood to review for the time being. I've already digested the harpy in this playthrough, so I can't review that scene. I hope this critique is more useful than it is aggressive. I really appreciate the amount of work that has gone into the game.

Thank you so much for this, we are aware that brothel scenes are of lower quality when it comes to grammar and we will fix that eventually, but for now we are kinda more focused on bringing more content and fixing game breaking bugs. Don't worry, we will fix it eventually, but right now it's not high on our priority list.

[Urielzael2]

I loaded up a save to play through the brothel scenes. I remembered them being sort of "off", but couldn't place it beyond one thing.

"Fruit" is an appropriate plural, so "fruits" reads strangely. The word "fruits" can be used to describe multiple kinds of fruit, but I would suggest referring directly to berries.

Then I started writing this post and replaying the scenes, and noticed some other stuff I would suggest changing. Constructive critique time!
-----

Details on Kotel's scene
When she returns to the room, it reads "Neko would quickly return with large bottle of milk and a huge goblet of fruits."
Suggested change: "The Neko returns to the room with a large bottle of milk and a goblet filled with fruit."
The biggest flaw in this sentence is the lack of articles for Neko and bottle.

"Kotel would only smile more warmly. She would start snuggling to you in..."
Suggested change: "Kotel smiles more warmly. She starts snuggling up to you..."
The use of "would" suggests future tense or suggested action. This interaction should use present tense.

Question asked to Kotel - "why can't you cannot drink alcohol?"
Remove the "cannot".

"Well Basically I have some alcohol problems. When I drink even a little I become more aggressive, dominative, and easy to piss off."
Basically is incorrectly capitalized. Dominative isn't a word, use "dominating".

I may go back through the other dialog options later if you would like further assistance with reviewing the scene.

-----
Erufu
"Sit or lay down on the bed and leave the rest on me"
Correct "on me" to "to me".

"Ok now that we have some privacy"
Erufu's character is really sexy. "Ok" is a sort of filler word that's mostly used when you're uncertain to reaffirm yourself. Just remove the "Ok" and the line will better fit the fantasy of the scene.

If you ask "Why" about her name, she will eventually say "I didn't mean to be mad on you"
This should be "get mad at you", or "didn't mean to snap at you"

Same line "as an apologize" should be "as an apology". Apologize is the verb form, so you would use it as an action such as "let me apologize", whereas apology is the noun, used such as "you owe me an apology".

Further into the scene, "Bra and Panties of Erufu's" should be "Erufu's bra and panties". You could also say "Erufu's undergarments", or "the thin strips of cloth obscuring Erufu's lovely breasts". The current wording reads in a clunky way and is haphazardly capitalized.

"Erufu would wink and move to strip you further"
"Erufu winks and continues to strip you."

"mushed a lot of peoples in there"
Changed to "people", it's already plural.

There are a few other minor issues with tense and plurality in the scene, but overall I quite liked Erufu's scene. Perhaps because Mirai's dialog is a bit annoying and Kotel's scene is not my preferred type of vore.
-----

That's all I'm in the mood to review for the time being. I've already digested the harpy in this playthrough, so I can't review that scene. I hope this critique is more useful than it is aggressive. I really appreciate the amount of work that has gone into the game.

Thank you for critique. I'm gonna try to improve my writting.

[NemoUlysses]

Hi Salamoun whether winter update? If Yes then which month is planned?

It should come out for the end of the month, apparently.

"Ok now that we have some privacy"
Erufu's character is really sexy. "Ok" is a sort of filler word that's mostly used when you're uncertain to reaffirm yourself. Just remove the "Ok" and the line will better fit the fantasy of the scene.

Isn't it Mirai who says this phrase?

[DroolingPred]

"Ok now that we have some privacy"
Erufu's character is really sexy. "Ok" is a sort of filler word that's mostly used when you're uncertain to reaffirm yourself. Just remove the "Ok" and the line will better fit the fantasy of the scene.

Isn't it Mirai who says this phrase?[/quote]

It's possible that Mirai uses the same phrase, but I was playing through Erufu's scene while writing my breakdown, and it's the first line she says after walking into the room.

[qq1486834788]

I hope the game will do better; in addition, I would like to ask how the code actually works - I only use the switch in RPG MAKER.

[salamoun]

I hope the game will do better; in addition, I would like to ask how the code actually works - I only use the switch in RPG MAKER.

The code itself for RPG maker is written in Ruby programming language and I do not know how to write in that myself, but if you mean functions of RPG maker, there are bunch of functionalities added like using variables instead of just switches, having conditional branches, altering items, looks, gold and much more. If you want to know how exactly I make God Complex, I mainly use scenes ending with switches that activate other events and options, that's why replaying most of the scenes in my game would be hard. I would have to turn off the switch for the previous scene to be available and that would remove the options unlocked before, potentially breaking part of the game's continuity.