Harleking31 - 1 year ago

Agh, so long... And yet I still return, because it's so good

MautStone - 5 years ago

3 years later...

Arrogancy - 6 years ago

I really hope this continues.

InfomercialNuttery - 7 years ago

So how tall is Greg at this point?

mgs19 - 7 years ago

Still hoping for more from this story!

Arrogancy - 8 years ago

I'm with you, I like the darker ends that Vuin's stories normally have. They're some of my favorite on this site.

nbe21 - 8 years ago

Can't wait to see how this turns out

Sengriah - 8 years ago

Unlike the others, i would love to see that mariage happen and to see Greg having to give all he have to Chammy And Samson. I'm all about those cruel unfair cuckold situations. I would have prefer Chammy to be really forced to love Samson and to treat Greg like a butt enhancement supply! :p
Can't wait to read the next part!

darc22005 - 8 years ago

I did enjoy seeing this one. Heres hoping Panda and the others get the hell out of this situation

RoboMax - 8 years ago

Been fully enjoying this series and how you've kept it easy to understand all the different plot points going on. Can't wait to read more and see where it all leads.

Arrogancy - 8 years ago

Hopeful the next chapter comes out soon.

hungryvulpine - 8 years ago

oh my god I keep checking everyday, stuff's about to go down

(one of those things is likely Isabel down Monica's gullet)

Scion - 8 years ago

I hope Isabel enjoys Monica's™ 100% Guaranteed weight loss program.

:^)

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

monica being evil again is no surprise now and it almost seems as if she has become racist to anthroes. but Harvey now getting caught up a bit will now urge him to bring down Jamie and the people he is working for. and how greg plans to get jamies cum will be a mystery since he can either have sex, blow him, or something I have little doubt of getting vored and having to find a way out XD but then again there are many more ways that can happen such as winning it in a bet or something else. all around a slow chapter with little action but more revelations and the mystery of wendy and why she needs jamies cum

YesImCanadian - 8 years ago

Jesus...fucking...Christ...

TheSoulessGem - 8 years ago

This is amazing, very well done. Thank you for the great read, can't wait to see more.

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

definitely a well written story and a good theme to explore but this type of story isn't my cup of tea. but besides my own gripe about it not being my fetish's I might check in on this story when its released to make sure your not losing your edge XD good luck Vuin

hungryvulpine - 8 years ago

You continue to amaze me. I'm glad to hear you're finishing Cocky Wagers but this is one heck of a preview of what's to come.

I have to admit I check your page everyday lately, you've been so busy it's really great to have you writing so much again.

Stalbon - 8 years ago

Very visceral, to be sure!

YesImCanadian - 8 years ago

That’s a fair point

Arrogancy - 8 years ago

I'm pretty sure they're referring to Wendy there. Considering that their drug needs some source of refinement, and Wendy can shift size at will, she's probably a source of production they need back under lock and key.

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

well the best villains are the ones who think what they do is right. that's why its so compelling to hate Samson now since his character is normally a kindhearted goofball but now that he has his deep desire in his hands he wont give it up so easily plus pay attention to the conversation between Jamie and the elf as they basically admit that they are using the fighters to test their drugs which has lead to such a whacky turn.

YesImCanadian - 8 years ago

I kind of feel like my thought of the control has some grounds to stand on. Monica was part of the first group that took the pill and ended up being able to control the amount she’s took originally, now we have Samson telling both Chang and Greg what is going to happen, and it’s happening.

I think the thing that pisses me off the most, is the fact that Greg couldn’t even refuse being Samson’s best man. It’s just...infuriating just hearing that. It’s like being forced to eat something you don’t like, but unable to not eat it.

Though the absolute worst, is the part where Samson thinks this is ok. That’s really got to me.

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

hmm well this chapter was more of a information dump then anything else which is needed if you ask me. due to the pill they took as contestants and better's greg and chammy cant refuse the pill so that means whatever Samson says goes and Jamie being the muscle behind what may be a pharmaceutical company is surprising to say the least as it seems like something very unexpected from his character. but his character reminds me of Ooma from unconventional methods and she was the stories biggest hit for me XD but besides that monica is being the bitch she was meant to be and giving humans a bad name XP all in all a good addition to the story all around

Trixter - 8 years ago

I bet you the story will not end with a happy ending for Greg.

Trixter - 8 years ago

Because my first comment is from the point that Chammy did not cheat and is just lying in this chapter for reasons.

Trixter - 8 years ago

One thing i kinda thought of if at any point earlier in the story it was pointed out that Chammy cheated and i missed it feel free to tell me that.

Trixter - 8 years ago

Well Chammy is a fucking idiot and Samson is just the worst kind of person. And having read many of Vuin's other stories hes gonna get off scot free with all of this i bet you.

darc22005 - 8 years ago

This was fun to read but this is probably the last chapter ill read sadly

YesImCanadian - 8 years ago

I have to agree. This series isn’t no longer one of my favorite. I honestly hope she gets what’s coming to her and Greg gives it. Or isn’t the bigger man ans Chamy forgives him, cause they are best couple!!!

Arrogancy - 8 years ago

Any hope for a continuation of this soon?

darc22005 - 8 years ago

Please Tanuki steal the size from her and get greg out of there

hungryvulpine - 8 years ago

Uh oh, all the cheating and betrayal is gonna come out soon. I wonder if Monica is actually going to let Greg out...

predatoronstick - 8 years ago

Well one can look on the Bright side, at this pace Harvey will be able to actually fuck his wife. Unless Monica doesn't recover from the effect all of this seem to have on her mind, Harvey probably won't like bitchy bimbo Monica that much.

RoboMax - 8 years ago

Been a really good read, thanks for sharing so far.

hungryvulpine - 8 years ago

Such a spurt of creativity from you, really glad you're working so hard on this story. I check everyday for an update. Great work as always, always glad to see some oral vore, wonder what Monica is going to do next with all her extra power and bimbo behavior now.

Lewd - 8 years ago

thank you for your time and effort in craft these narratives!

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

its just all dependent on where the writer decides on where the story goes

YesImCanadian - 8 years ago

That will certainly be interesting. For the digestion part, there's always the chance that she'll get escorted away somewhere, and get mixed up with one of the contestants. She could get away with it in the end. I do feel bad for Greg, though he was kind of asking for it. I just wasn't expecting Monica to do it. I wonder what her husband will say when/if he finds out about what she did.

UnbirthLover - 8 years ago

You are seriously one amazing writer! I couldn't stop myself from reading all 4 of these entries in a single day. Also, I'm pretty sure that your character-building is better than my own pieces... can't wait for the next entry! :)

Lewd - 8 years ago

Finally after checking back everyday for 3 weeks we got an update! You rock vuin!

Scion - 8 years ago

hot damn.

so many possibilities :)

Arrogancy - 8 years ago

I hope the next installment comes out soon, I'm loving this series.

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

well I didn't expect the fight to take such a mental turn but it did heighten the storytelling of the scene and a good analysis of how chammy thinks but the big cliffhanger will be who won?

Tafillia - 8 years ago

Love thise and getting to see more indepth jaime x3

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

also the appearance of wendy and the elf had added a bizarre and interesting turn in this story but now that begs the questions of whats Wendy's endgame, will monica get whats coming to her?, and what will happen next? more character reveals or is this as big as the cast gets?

Killjoy364 - 8 years ago

just so you know you messed up and said both instead of bother to undress towards the bottom half of the story

Scion - 8 years ago

Oh ho

quite the plot!


The nuances in character personality really make this.

:)

UnbirthLover - 8 years ago

This is, undoubtedly, my favorite edition of this series.

Arrogancy - 8 years ago

I don't suppose we'd be so lucky that a third part would be coming as quickly as the second part had?

Lewd - 8 years ago

Can't wait to see the next chapter!

darc22005 - 8 years ago

Really interesting ending. Cant wait to see where this goes

YesImCanadian - 8 years ago

Wow, I’m liking this series a lot. Looking forward to the next part. Also, kind of glad Monica was sucked down. She had it coming.

darc22005 - 8 years ago

Love the trait theft aspects <3

darc22005 - 8 years ago

Ooooh more lewd from Vuin <3

Tafillia - 8 years ago

Loved it, cant wait to see more of this one and would love to see more of that horse hehe x3 ~<3

Larkspurdiblock - 8 years ago

Interesting. You have my attention, that's for sure.

HatePlow - 8 years ago

Boy, this sure is a lot of new series made. I'm kind of not wanting to read it if it's just going to end up unfinished like everything else.

Snekpizza - 3 years ago

I loved this story when it came out! Thank you for the amazing stories! Hope one day you come back and finish these stories!

MautStone - 5 years ago

Where is chapter 3? Im dying to see what happens the next day!

Boltbond - 7 years ago

MOAR

YesImCanadian - 9 years ago

This is a sad story to me. Interesting, but sad.

Sengriah - 9 years ago

Love it. Cuckold things are awesome !

darc22005 - 9 years ago

Although I dont quite see how this is Cuckold or Cuckolding. Is that in the next chapters?

darc22005 - 9 years ago

Great story so far

Killjoy364 - 9 years ago

also pertaining to your story now it was interesting with a nice build up to the next chapter keep up the work

Killjoy364 - 9 years ago

any idea when cocky pasta two comes out vuin?

Scion - 9 years ago

that's some build up :)

Killjoy364 - 6 months ago

wish there was a part 2 to this...miss ya vuin

MautStone - 5 years ago

Chapter 2?

PurplePanther - 9 years ago

This is fantastic, I love Rika. But man, I'm wishing hard for the asshole step dad not to win in the end right now.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

I reaaaaally hope Rika cockvores his stepdad

Camlio420 - 9 years ago

Okay I gotta voice a gripe and it's because I love your stories that I have too. While I could understand letting the asshole have his way on the mountain cabin story because the husband was kind of a controlling prude Dick. I don't understand how being horny can excuse Rika letting her boyfriend of Three years get swatted across the face like that. Especially since from their dynamic he seems like a nice faithful if easily embarrassed guy. But who wouldn't be easily embarrassed when your lover has a Dick as big as you?

Just saying that it doesn't feel reasonable for Rika to not say anything about this just because she's horny because the chemicals that cause horniness are the same ones that make anger stronger. Hormones.

Mage24365 - 10 years ago

Gotta love attribute theft. This came out great!

Stalbon - 10 years ago

Always good to see your works come along, especially with growth incoming alongside the vore! :)

moonlightshy - 10 years ago

<3

thefacelessone - 9 years ago

Nice story, but I hope there's a human slave uprising one day.

Thanatos2k - 10 years ago

"She betrayed us! I should know, because I was going to betray you!"

Gallent - 10 years ago

Why don't you just look at other stories that have those things instead?

t4capt - 10 years ago

Could always use more cock vore and Herms!

dagar - 10 years ago

Jolly good work. Definitely still sticking with your dark tone.

TheInquisitor - 7 years ago

This series gives me seriously conflicting feelings. There are few times in my life were I've feel in two minds about somethings as intensely as this.

That's all i gotta say.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

Thought the first one was great. Then 2,3 didn't quite as much because of his own wife treated Yeo like a rug and larry. Can't stand anyone like that. I was really really hoping that machine would have actually made Yeo win.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

Thought the first one was great. Then 2,3 didnt quite as much because of his own wife treated Yeo like a rub, and larry. Cant stand anyone like that. I was really really hoping that machine would have actually made Yeo win.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

Idk I liked the first one but two and three just, didnt click for me. Cat got treated like shit, wife was an idiot.. Just idk

Scion - 10 years ago

Really dig your stories -

it's interesting to see bimboification in a vore story with cuckolding

My favorite theme, which I really should write, is bimbofication through absorption and reverse cuckolding / femdom LOL!

Vuin - 10 years ago

I'm very aware that I've had a huge lapse in time between uploads, but I assure you part 3 is almost finished! It really only needs to be tidied up and then uploaded. I stay so busy outside of Eka's I often find myself for days at a time in a place where I only have my phone, and not the laptop I write with!

skulldude111 - 10 years ago

More, please!

HatePlow - 10 years ago

This story just gets better and better! I'm wondering whether Larry's going to use the bimbo ray on Misa, Mei or Yeo! Keep up the fun! If you hadn't already made the bull hyper endowed then I would have suggested cock transformation. Add Yeo to the already virile bull! I don't know whether I'd rather have Yeo end up cum digested or entrapped in Larry or Misa. So much want, only one story series!

TheInquisitor - 10 years ago

Can't wait for a part 3! You've done a mint job on this series :)

Apocryphic - 10 years ago

A bimbo gun, eh? Now I'm thinking poor Yeo's going to end up female and impregnated. He's already been slurped into a cock and ass, so I'm thinking someone will take the vaginal route next.
Perhaps Larry will catch him trying to escape tonight and zap him, or Yeo will try zapping Larry and it malfunctions. Either way, I'd expect Larry to try Yeo out, then let her stew overnight before a cock ride into Mei. Yeo might end up on the receiving end, though, if Mei keeps showing an attitude and gets slurped first.
Who knows what other strange inventions await, though? Maybe Yeo could gain the upper hand by swapping bodies with Larry.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

I hope Yeo does as well.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

Wow his wifes kind of a bitch

skulldude111 - 10 years ago

This is so hot, please continue this storyline to the end!

W4RR3N - 10 years ago

I have an idea. If he doesn't turn into cum, then have him use the ray gun thing. The batteries are shorted out, but nothing was said about it being non-functional.

W4RR3N - 10 years ago

I agree, besides, his wife was kind of a bitch anyways. Lets get some revenge fuckings and vorings!

thefacelessone - 2 years ago

VERY nice, would be great to see more of Jag someday!

darc22005 - 9 years ago

That is a pretty good point, if he was partially digested only Amelia definitely woulda figured that out afterward.

KrasnyiKoiot - 11 years ago

...The pun, the pun! Woe be it, the pun.

Delightful read, the cruel irony was well set up.

ShadesofBlack - 11 years ago

My goodness, that was a turn on!

Camlio420 - 11 years ago

I... hate this kind of story, not because it's bad or because of the content but, because nobody answers the question of what comes next? It was the night before their wedding for fuck's sake, that's kind of important!

So, honestly while it was a good story, it feels... lacking because it doesn't show what happens after especially since it was specifically mentioned he was only partially digested meaning he should be recognizable if one of the girls manages to see him.

darc22005 - 9 years ago

I am loving this series I hope it continues

mandolore - 12 years ago

more soon vuin need more of this

moosecowboy - 12 years ago

I wish the digestion wasn't so rapid in your world but I'm glad to see you back.

Thanatos2k - 12 years ago

Go story go

Stalbon - 12 years ago

Once again, your characters continue to intrigue. And they are, as usual, real characters, with flaws and good points make in equal quantities. :)

AssIdolizer - 12 years ago

God I'm glad you're back.

Thanatos2k - 12 years ago

Time for revengeance!

Slash - 12 years ago

Sweet work here Vuin. Looking forward to the next chapter. :3

Stalbon - 12 years ago

Very interesting indeed! Reminiscent of your earlier works in both form and content...which means I look forward to more development within the surviving characters and more exquisite hyperness in those who show it. <3

Inverness - 13 years ago

Nice to see you're continuing your writing. I hope to see more soon.

Thanatos2k - 13 years ago

So he went to a concert, took some bad drugs, fell onto the ground, got trampled to death and/or had a heart attack, and woke up in hell?

Fun times.

thefacelessone - 2 years ago

I hope to see more of this someday, Ooma is my favorite char of yours!

Vuin - 8 years ago

This one is definitely in the freezer right now, but one day I may thaw it back out.

hungryvulpine - 8 years ago

I just have to say, I'm sure this story is dead but I was really hoping to one day see it continued. That and 'The Maw.' Your inspiration takes you to different places of course but I can dream, right!

F1reDem0n - 9 years ago

I do hope you have plans of doing more work in this part 2 series of Unconventional Methods. I would like to know more of the story after all that's happened.

Here to hoping!

SonOfDarkness - 9 years ago

That was hot. I hope you finish the series. I'd like to see some more of Buti.

Stalbon - 14 years ago

Let's hope for more, to be sure! :)

Slash - 14 years ago

This will certainly get interesting.

Resileaf - 14 years ago

Funny, I just stopped playing a bit of Arkham asylum... So this kind of thing suddenly seemed VERY familiar.

Kaoru - 14 years ago

Funnily enough, I found the journal entry about the new series, after reading this story itself. You continue to improve as a writer, and you continue to write some very, very nice things, along with it. *Cough!~*

I like the new characters, I like the new setting, and I especially like the dialogue and interplay between everyone. The world you fashion has such a ...spice, to it, I suppose. Keep it up!
~K

hungryvulpine - 8 years ago

I have very fond memories of following this story over several months as you finished it. I just randomly clicked the first chapter and was so hooked by the third I couldn't wait for the next.

Ooma's devilish and kinky sadism is just a perfect blend unmatched by any other story I've found on this site.

F1reDem0n - 9 years ago

Hard to believe its been over 4 years since you originally uploaded this. I remember following it as you uploaded each separate story.

Still one of the best stories I've seen around. Both deep, cleaver, and kinky. Not something you find to often.

Hopefully now that you are back, more stories will follow.

Nevek - 10 years ago

This is magnificent!!!!!!!!

Thanatos2k - 13 years ago

I have to say this set of stories is absolutely exceptional. I usually judge the quality of a vore story by the author's willingness to kill main characters, and this one gets an A+

michaelcn - 14 years ago

hmm..... make more XD

snugglyrocker - 14 years ago

Love how this ended. :3 Fantastic series start to end.

Mark - 14 years ago

Well, we're told she was captured. I'd imagine that what happened to her after that would be up to the courts...and we don't know how they usually treat criminal predators. Ooma could be looking at anything from doing time for a long while (with the possible sequel hook of seeing her again in prison or her somehow managing to get out) to execution by a bigger pred herself, depending on how much the country believes in capital punishment and 'poetic' justice.

Personally of course, as I said, I'd like to see her again and by all means up to the same old tricks. As long as she remembers she has a brain, she may be slippery enough to pull that off somehow, too. ;)

Stalbon - 14 years ago

I see there's no...definitive words detailing the fate of Ooma, specifically. Odd, given that it's a voraphilic epic with many other characters shown graphically ingested and all. Do you know, particularly, what her fate was? Or is it left untold, ambiguous, to set up a possible sequel series?

dagar - 14 years ago

Oh yea, it never said how Mala got out of Ooma's nuts ^^; It was very implied she melted away!

Mark - 14 years ago

Well, after all the confusion and plot twists I'd have to say the resolution and wrap-up came just a bit abruptly. I've also found myself wondering just why Ooma didn't seem to be at all concerned about that self-destruct in the end, seeing how *she* could have easily been blown up along with her 'prey'...

That said? I for one certainly wouldn't mind reading more about these characters (Hans vs. Ooma in particular ;)), or other stories in the same setting. So there's always room for a sequel...

PsychoKrows - 14 years ago

Thank you for continuing your work on this series. I have to admit I check at least once a week to see if you've updated and it's always awesome when you have. Looking forward to the finale of this series with a bunch of anticipation and sadness that it has to end at some point.

It's great to have you on aryion, I can't wait to see what else you'll produce.

Stalbon - 14 years ago

I will admit, I wasn't looking forward to Ooma going away, so you've got my deepest appreciation for keeping such a great, interesting character around. Not that Mala's feat of gluttony there wasn't interest-perking, as well!

I can understand that keeping Ooma, who seems a one-trick pony, around will need better and better reasons, especially if Mala (and others, according to her) can do what she did. Still, I'm sure you have my thanks and the thanks of many others. :) Keep up the good work!

Inverness - 14 years ago

Great work on this chapter. I also highly favor Ooma. I hope to see more very soon.

AssIdolizer - 14 years ago

I have never wanted the bad guys to win more. Ooma is just the sexiest character! Glad to see another chapter, hope that there's much more where this came from.

bluerosewolf - 14 years ago

Fantastic story! thanks very much for doing this!!!

Inverness - 14 years ago

Your whole series is very impressive. I eagerly await more.

Stalbon - 14 years ago

Ooma has certainly hit upon me as a very...interesting and engrossing character! I quite like your descriptions involving her, to be certain. It has a lot of inspiring and vivid detail.

PsychoKrows - 14 years ago

2 in one day? I'm really impressed. Every addition leaves me wanting to know what happens next. I'm not sure who I'm rooting for at this point, perhaps there is no correct side for Hans to join.

Mark - 14 years ago

Things may not be what they seem in that it's entirely possible that Hans's 'helper' may have a more sinister agenda than he's let on as well (just how powerful *is* that self-destruct device again, for example?)...but it's really a bit too late to pull a "the bad guys are just misunderstood victims!" reveal at this point. Either our protagonist has chosen the right side by now or there simply wasn't a 'right' side to pick in the first place.

Whatever666 - 14 years ago

Spoiler alert for those who read comments before they read the story:

I'm worried. I have no idea how you are going to magic a plot twist that makes sense out of your top hat.
I'm all up for being surprised, though!

Mark - 14 years ago

Well. To be honest, I'd kind of expect Ooma to eventually catch on to the fact that her latest catch isn't digesting properly (if she hasn't already -- I mean, she seems to be enough in touch with her internal processes to get off on them doing their job). If/when *that* happens, things should get interesting...especially since by now it looks like she could be tempted into selling out her 'boss' for the right price easily enough. If so, that's one round of negotiations where Hans definitely *wouldn't* want to get tongue-tied at the wrong moment. :)

Looking forward to the next chapter as well.

soline - 14 years ago

Oh god yes! More! Hooray!!!

Ace addition, fingers crossed she just keeps him in there!

PsychoKrows - 14 years ago

Holy shit I love you, great addition to the series!

Scion - 14 years ago

sexy :)

still rooting for ooma

AssIdolizer - 14 years ago

So glad you're back. Should we expect another long absence?

Vuin - 14 years ago

I wrote this while working on the next chapter for Unconventional Methods, it was an idea that popped into my head for a series and I wrote down the notes for it and this is what it turned into.

PsychoKrows - 14 years ago

I know you posted this a while back but let me just say that I have really enjoyed reading this series so far and am looking forward to whatever you create next. One of the things I check for every time I log in here is a continuation of your story, you've done a great job so far and I hope you haven't left us. It'd be a shame to lose such a great contributor.

Readasaur - 14 years ago

I think I'm the only one hoping the villains lose here, but I'll hope with all my might! XD

Mark - 14 years ago

While there aren't a lot of concrete size values for anybody to be found in the story, back in chapter 2 Ooma is credited with a cock "four feet in length, minimum" -- and that's while not even aroused yet and before we first see her eating anybody. And no matter how exaggerated her proportions may be, she can obviously still move pretty fast with both that and all her other endowments.

So, yeah. BIG salamander. ;)

soline - 14 years ago

Ooma kicks ass! (and swallows it). Gotta say I hadn't pictured her quite so massive until now, but I like it! You're the only author I've ever seen use the word 'caboose' well either ;-D

Keep up the incredible work, you're an amazing writer!

Sora - 14 years ago

Great stuff! I agree Scion, go Ooma!

soline - 14 years ago

bloody marvellous

dagar - 14 years ago

O_O
*stunned face*

PsychoKrows - 14 years ago

Thought we lost you there. Another great chapter!

Sora - 14 years ago

Another great chapter! I love Ooma, very unique to see a Salamander. Awesome work!

Sora - 14 years ago

I thoroughly enjoyed that Vuin. The anal vore really painted an erotic picture in my mind. Bravo!

soline - 14 years ago

oh definately, there's a massive vore fanbase over there

Decimos - 14 years ago

Aggh, woulda killed for some more dialogue from Lanni during certain parts, much as I can understand her not being quite so able to express. More of her and Ooma, please.

Slash - 14 years ago

Well written. :3

Morphy - 14 years ago

Gotta say I am really enjoying this series.

As for the hooded mastermind, I'm puting money on it being an antho-cockroach.

I was sad to see Dredge go, was just getting to know the gruff officer, but when Ooma struggled and stretched herself over him, wow. (vore, hot, microvore, hotter)

PsychoKrows - 14 years ago

Great series so far. Really looking forward to the next installment. Keep up the great work!

soline - 14 years ago

do so if you like, personally I prefer to leave my own stuff as I wrote it, so that I can look back on where I came from (for example my first ever story? I thought it was AMAZING, I look back now and see how poor it is compared to what I can do now, gives me a warm feeling inside and I'm always glad I didn't edit it out as I improved)

Vuin - 14 years ago

Funny enough, I was going throughout my day today wondering about just such things. When I read your comment earlier before I had a chance to reply, I could easily note back in my head that I was prone to using that word a lot.

Thank you very much for pointing that out to me, and the critique is always very welcome. I've since revised chapter 4, and may go back and revise the previous chapters as well.

soline - 14 years ago

Excellent, EXCELLENT job! truely brilliant!

The one issue I picked up on though? your use of the word 'would'...It's a common mistake in new writers, but it's seen quite obviously, it's 'engrish' sounds almost like english, but not, as though written by a second language. "Blah would sit down" Doesn't work, In my experience 'would' rarely preceeds anything except 'of'...it's an exception clause "Blah would have sat down, but there was no chair" etc.

dagar - 14 years ago

Now I just feel worse that Mala is gone >.< Blast it ^^;

Slash - 14 years ago

I think it's pretty healthy to knock -off come characters with depth in writing. It makes you consider the other character much more. Also, makes you realize that anyone of them can bite it if there not careful. It keeps you reading, with uncertainty to what will happen next. With a job like theirs, catching vorish, depraved criminals. It's not likely that everyone is going to make it, at the end of the day. Great job.

dagar - 14 years ago

Yea, but I'd grown attached to her.... >.< Maybe a plot device will bring her back? I can still hope can't I? XD

soline - 14 years ago

Enjoying? Hell no Vuin! I'm LOVING the series! I'm also astonished at how fast you're going. Honestly if I didn't go through EVERY latest submission daily on Eka's I'd have watched you six times over by now!

I'm not the only one saddened to see Mala go so soon, perhaps you might consider doing an offshoot of the series when you have time? either something non-canonical or an 'old' mission, with Mala enjoying her job to it's fullest...

soline - 14 years ago

Me too, she was such an excellent character! Ahh well, if anyone had to replace her 'voracious fem' in the series I'm glad it's Ooma!

dagar - 14 years ago

This is really sad for me >.< I had high hopes she'd be rescued! >.<

Vuin - 14 years ago

Thanks for the feedback, I'll keep that in mind for the future chapters!

soline - 14 years ago

Although I was a little disappointed with the lack of detail on the vore D:

soline - 14 years ago

Wow....that's amazing!

Disappointed Mala went, she was a good character, but hey, replaced by a sadistic snake? that's just excellent!

Vuin - 14 years ago

Thanks! I recently posted the second chapter to this story, check it out!

soline - 14 years ago

Fantastically written! I definately hope you do more!

Vuin - 14 years ago

Yes, I noticed it was actually a bit more censored. Was just a writing experiment to see how it was received, haha.

Taris - 14 years ago

i hope to see this squad in action, or just playing sround! all the juicy bits happened 'off screen' as it were...

Zolatul - 12 years ago

I would have liked more elaboration on the ending, Abby gets pissed at Jugo for cum transforming her boyfriend and such, but that's just me. Overall, great. Sequel, please?

Kooshmeister - 15 years ago

A deliciously evil ending! Would've been hotter if Abby had been cockvored, though, and cummed up Kurt's ass, but that's just me.

Houyo - 15 years ago

Nice story, sweet and simple. Though the ending was a little abrupt, I personally would have like to see a little bit more. But still, good job.

WolfFort - 15 years ago

Pretty good. The only thing that feel off is the end feels short some how.
I do like theheaddsn idea too.

Vuin - 15 years ago

I like your ideas, perhaps they'll show up in future stories! Keep an eye out.