The Last Dance
By Tobedumped -- Report
Catherine is twenty-one and tired of being controlled. Whether it’s her boring boyfriend demanding that she be more straight-laced or her man-eating sorority demanding that she break things off with him, at every turn she’s being told what to do. One of them has to go. Once the gauntlet is laid down, though, things are going to get messy.
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Posted by Drakira 16 years ago Report
Great job TBD. Please continue your writing. As for a good title hmm...
A Shitty Date
The Night She Dumped Him
Those are just two simple Ideas.
Posted by Tobedumped 16 years ago Report
Thanks for the ideas. I think I'm going with "The Last Dance" for the title. After all, I think there's enough poo jokes in the text of the story itself. :-p
Posted by Drakira 16 years ago Report
Indeed there are. Anyway I hope to see more work done by you. If you ever want suggestions I would be glad to give you some, once you are done with the other nine.
Posted by MilkChocolate 16 years ago Report
Been waiting a long time for another story from you. What a great way to come back!
Posted by Tobedumped 16 years ago Report
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it. Hopefully there will be more coming soon; I've got a whopping 9 or so that I'm working on right now.
Posted by The Dracomancer 15 years ago Report
“Don't worry.” Catherine announced loudly, before lifting her skirt and mooning the crowd with her diaper. “You're going to see plenty of Ryan tonight.” The girls hooted and hollered, excited at the preview to the evening's entertainment—nothing beat the graphic digestion of an ex-boyfriend.
This line gives me shivers. When I read this line I feel scared. I feel scared that such a planet, such a society could exist, even in anyone's imagination. I shiver with arousal as the darker side of me revels in such a cruel display of blatant disrespect for human life.
to evoke such feelings in a viewer with mere words takes an unmatched level of skill. I sincerely thank you for sharing your works with us and encourage you to continue writing.
THANK YOU!
Posted by Sora 15 years ago Report
I agree with the above post ^
I must say that was an amazing story TBD!
Really look forward to reading more from you.
Posted by Tobedumped 15 years ago Report
Thank you both! I'm always working on something-- hopefully there will be another finished product soon.
Posted by ButtPlug 15 years ago Report
Geez, they're such a group of bitches! I'm sorry, does anyone even think of a person's life anymore?
If she didn't want to be with him, break up!
Don't fucking kill him!
And everyone just went "Yaay!"
Not cool.
I "almost" agree with The Dracomancer.
Posted by Sith 15 years ago Report
That is one very odd story, not often diapers are seen with vore and i certainly didn't expect anal. :P
Posted by Tobedumped 15 years ago Report
I will go ahead and take that as a compliment as this was certainly intended to be an odd story! :)
Posted by Indighost 15 years ago Report
Interesting twist on AV and digestion. Thanks for posting--I enjoyed this story :)
Posted by RaharuCV 15 years ago Report
Well, I really love that story ! =D
And it was a real pleasure to read a story including prey pooped in a diaper !
Posted by Tobedumped 15 years ago Report
Thanks! Catherine might be making a return to the Portal in a new story some time in the future.
Posted by RaharuCV 15 years ago Report
Oh f**k... Now I'm impatient to have more details =D
Posted by deleteduser301 15 years ago Report
Wow that was really awesome & really hot, I would have gladly been in Catherine's victims predicament.
Can't wait to see her return to the portal. I will envy her luck preys until then ^_^
Posted by redsquallff8 14 years ago Report
no offence but i though that she'd feel more regret form killing her boyfriend though
Posted by Tobedumped 14 years ago Report
Glad you seemed to like it anyways. Catherine-- and the others'-- reaction is meant to be satirical, but I might try a more realistic take at guilt some other time.
Posted by redsquallff8 14 years ago Report
but your a great writer and actually i do like her as pred and her style. just in this scene she just seemed to cold thou given it was a boyfriend that she had for sometime.
Posted by NekuTheEmo 14 years ago Report
totally awesome story :)
Posted by emissaryofrainbows 11 years ago Report
This story is absolutely lovely
Posted by Kelly 8 years ago Report
Ohhhh please this was amazing ever thought about writing more ? :3