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25: Goodbye, Rob By dreamweevil

Uploaded: 10 months ago

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Cerys has to make a final decision on the fate of her passenger and unfortunate ex-boyfriend, Rob. Collaboration with bigmacrmuk.

Comment on 25: Goodbye, Rob

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MasterGryph

Posted by MasterGryph 8 months ago

Well, this reading has shown me quite a few things.

You're a great sci-fi writer. But your characters have gotten better over time.

I don't know who Cerys thinks she's fooling. Alicia, as she has been for a while, is Evil. She could have grown out of it, but the one person who could have helped her with that ceased to exist for two years. If Daisy hadn't wasted her time trying to convince Rob that he actually wanted this (which on an in-character basis, I don't believe for a second), and instead turned to Alicia to accept that she'd done wrong...

Cerys, Belle, and Casey, are Evil for enabling her. On a tangent, Casey's niceness towards Cerys as described here was obviously fake, and Cerys knows enough to put that together by now. But since Cerys turned out to be just as bad, it didn't turn out to matter.

Like lots of characters, they could have used more time to shine.

dreamweevil

Posted by dreamweevil 8 months ago

Thanks! Cerys is bigmacrmuk's character (like Rob), and we didn't want to drag that story arc out too long with lots of dialogue and exposition, but that shortchanged Casey and particularly Cerys.

I still say that Belle is neutral. She enabled her sister, even giving her the 5.0 powers that she goes on to abuse. But this means that Belle keeps the family sufficiently together for key events that happen later.

I get this feeling that Alicia is often trying to grow out of it. She never admits it, but she'd do anything for her sisters (and does, later.)


MasterGryph

Posted by MasterGryph 8 months ago

Thanks for being so positive. Marathoning his half of the story, the negativity really got to me. It brought some of my own inner extremism to the surface.

Not that my belief that Neutrality that accepts blatant evil on a personal level ceases to be neutrality isn't genuine.

dreamweevil

Posted by dreamweevil 8 months ago

Oh, absolutely. (All it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.)

I think many people have met a character like Belle at least once. A person who just wants to make everyhing "okay" without ever looking at the big picture.

This stretch of the story is definitely dark and extremely female-dominant: we're seeing what one of these women can do to a man if she wants to.

When it engages people this way, when people take it personally, it tells me I've achieved, however briefly, that goal of all writing: to get you to forget that you're reading a story. Once I get you there, I can take you anywhere, including somewhere far more pleasant.