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Based off the first version of this story, Redacted is about a nameless prisoner, a person conned into imprisonment and subjected to being a guinea pig for experimentation, exposed to many horrors that blur the line between reality and nightmare.
The imprisoned are drugged into submission, causing some to lose their humanity and will to live, and others their memories and identities. It makes them easier to control, and easier to experiment on.
The prisoner, 983, eventually ends up being scheduled to wake a sleeping monster that had devoured previous personnel, seeing that it's easier to send someone that isn't a valuable asset in case the monster attacks again. Instead of being eaten, the prisoner ends up befriending the monster, discovering that she is anything but. Now the two must survive long enough in order to escape the nameless foundation of horrors, and 983 must survive creature after creature, each with their own quirks and personality, each with their own reason to eat him alive...
Feedback would be greatly appreciated, since I'm unsure of the writing and pacing, but everyone gets sick of their own work after looking at it too much... I also know there's not a ton of vore in this chapter, so I hope that's not an issue. I don't like shoehorning vore in if it doesn't pertain to the story, but constructive criticism is always appreciated if you disagree.
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Posted by DragonMaster888123 4 years ago Report
Loved the first one. Can’t wait to see where this one goes. Keep up the good work. Hope the next one comes out soon.
Posted by TystKrigare 4 years ago Report
Thank you ^^ I work with what creativity I'm given
Posted by MechaSharkZilla 4 years ago Report
Holy crap, I forgot you had plans to do another writing of this story. So far, it's really good! Glad to see you writing again. <3
Posted by TystKrigare 4 years ago Report
Thank you very much! I'm trying to write consistently again and get all of my ideas and stories out. I just work on what I'm currently interested in or what sounds best at the time. I'm glad there are people interested in this rewrite still, I wasn't sure after posting it ^^;
Posted by joeburp22181 4 years ago Report
I second that!
Posted by TheMysteriousSadSack 4 years ago Report
Finally got around to reading this, really pricks that nostalgia part in me when I read it. Will this be taking a new direction or will it be like a re-telling of the OG redacted. I know itd be spoiler territory bur will we be seeing any of the experiments from the first version or nah
Posted by TystKrigare 4 years ago Report
Imagine the first story was a plain cheese pizza. What I'm going for now is a supreme pizza, if that makes any sense.
Basically I'm trying to rewrite it with better, well, writing, better character development, more detail, more story overall. There will be similarities and the overarching story will more or less be the same but I'm hoping to add enough differences in the content to justify rewriting to begin with, not to mention to those who would read it.
The other main reason I'm rewriting it, as I said in somewhere else, where I don't remember, was that I already had a sequel in mind for this story, but in order to do that, I wanted to come to this first and redo it and make it better because I wasn't exactly proud of my first written vore story. Later I'll make a blog post to see if anyone even likes the idea I have for the sequel, but the answer won't keep me from redoing this story at least.