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Widowed at the baby shower By ryanshowseason3 -- Report

Dan's wife Tanya is pregnant which would be great news if he wasn't a guy. Due to family traditions and societal pressures men rarely if ever meet their children. There's no question about it, Dan isn't surviving the baby shower but can he at least find inner peace before he's Tanya's tits and shits?

This was a delightful short commission to write though don't expect me to do many pregnant preds. It isn't my thing but the narrative here really inspired me and the Nikki and Michelle characters really formed up beautifully. Nikki in particular surprised me when I realized what her motivations for predding quickly would be caused by.

A commission by an anonymous commissioner

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BaseKing

Posted by BaseKing 2 months ago Report

The writing was great as always but I couldn’t get into or finish this one. Idk it felt way to mean spirited for me

ryanshowseason3

Posted by ryanshowseason3 2 months ago Report

A lot of the time with commissions I'm writing what the person paying me wants to read. In this case I got the sense that a mean spirited attitude towards males was desired and they were satisfied.

I'm just glad to be able to sense the target and hit the mark for the one writing the check here. I could have done better on the tags though to warn of this though admittedly.

BaseKing

Posted by BaseKing 2 months ago Report

Oh sorry I hope that didn’t come off as too negative. I was still really well done just not my cup of tea. Next time I’ll look through the tags more carefully

NewSuperTrios

Posted by NewSuperTrios 2 months ago Report

This is one of those works that puts the sheer terror of death right in front of me.

willofwii

Posted by willofwii 2 months ago Report

At first it felt off putting with the cruelty but after reading the ending and thinking about it the cruelty and uncaring nature of all the women makes sense in a Misandrist society. Not as arousing as usual but thought provoking.

SalineSabath

Posted by SalineSabath 2 months ago Report

Another great story, well written and well composed. I love the overall substance of the story but seemingly like my fellow readers it seemed a bit to dark and mean spirited. The cast and stories history in universe are quite marvelous, you can see the effort you have put into writing this tale. Perhaps it is just the story or the comfort of some form of remembrance in vore but your story has struck a strange dread within me, more so than your previous tale I read.

I give you the highest marks for being such a talented writer and to finding new ways to "scarouse" me.

However it is clear that was what you were going for so it is a rousing success, a true pleasure to read.

Just overall good writing, but not so good for those looking to get there rocks off it seems.

look forward to your next story!

ryanshowseason3

Posted by ryanshowseason3 2 months ago Report

A lot of the time with commissions I'm writing what the person paying me wants to read. In this case I got the sense that a mean spirited attitude towards males was desired and they were satisfied.

I'm just glad to be able to sense the target and hit the mark for the one writing the check here. I could have done better on the tags though too warn of this though admittedly.

SalineSabath

Posted by SalineSabath 2 months ago Report

OH! This isn't an attack on your work, its quite obviously done on purpose and well done at that. I also know that a paying customer asks for their kinks and not everyone wants the same things, so its not an issue.

However some tags would maybe help.

Love your work!

AllmightyImortal

Posted by AllmightyImortal 2 months ago Report

I just want to say, this should not be under willing and willing pray, because he isn't willing, he is reluctant at best and very unwilling at the end. I know people enjoy it and I don't want to rag, especially since someone paid you for this but I like willing prey, I like submission, and I don't really like stories like this where they prey isn't willing and makes me think of repercussion for those involved, basically an alt story where he turns the tables around. Again, not ragging on you or anything, just think two of the tags should not be there. Sorry if this turned into a rant, just saying my opinion

ryanshowseason3

Posted by ryanshowseason3 2 months ago Report

I'm unsure on this point myself. He certainly let's her eat him without resistance. And he never gets to the point of trying to escape himself, just not liking the outcome when delerium hits. It's always her decision for him even if he makes weak attempts to request otherwise, he's leaving it up to her no matter what.


I don't see willingness and reluctance as mutually exclusive. You can be reluctant to do the dishes and still do them willingly without someone forcing you to. I just don't see it as being one or the other necessarily.

I do see willing and unwilling as exclusive though. But unwilling comes with all sorts of associated actions and feelings. Trying to escape or very vocal opposition to the situation, maybe even just mental opposition. He's definitely not unwilling.

There's just a spectrum of willing in my head and reluctance falls into the willing side of things it is just closer to that divide with unwilling.

That's my opinion. I appreciate the criticism though and exploration of the topic.

doomed

Posted by doomed 2 months ago Report

Jeez , this one is lowkey really cruel . So you did a great job since judging by the comments that was what the commissioner wanted

ryanshowseason3

Posted by ryanshowseason3 2 months ago Report

Yup, just the flavor I'm delivering today. Next commission one will be too. Perhaps I'll release one of my other narratives waiting in the wings to counter balance. There's dozens but they don't have manips so they lay dormant.

doomed

Posted by doomed 2 months ago Report

yeah, i say a little balance may be needed. as dropping multiple cruel stories may cause people to think this is all you write. either way great work

AlexSama

Posted by AlexSama 2 months ago Report

Great story, nice buildup to an ultimately cruel end. I loved it and i'm certain many other less vocal fans loved it too.

ryanshowseason3

Posted by ryanshowseason3 2 months ago Report

Thanks, good to hear!