Uploaded: 1 year ago
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First person point of view of a poor girl named Jenna, Graphic digestion warning is here.
Please do add more tags to this, I'm not to familiar with the tagging system
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Posted by Dream_World_Nomad 1 year ago Report
also criticism appreciated
Posted by TableManners 1 year ago Report
This is a nice story! My main note is that you have an issue with the tense - usually you should write in the past tense.
Rachel would sigh -> Rachel sighed
Posted by Dream_World_Nomad 1 year ago Report
Thank you, english is a second language for me and I'm always lookin to improve my grammer
Posted by TableManners 1 year ago Report
Thanks for putting yourself out there despite that, I definitely enjoyed this!
Posted by bestgirlRosa 1 year ago Report
Cute story :3
I'm a fan of both onomatopoeia and some nice crunchy digestion, so it was a fun read
Posted by Dream_World_Nomad 1 year ago Report
I had to google onomatopoeia
Posted by bestgirlRosa 1 year ago Report
The more ya know !
Posted by Junogray 1 year ago Report
Nice, some nice casual vore right on the bus, all before her stop, the sound effects are a treat
Posted by Dream_World_Nomad 1 year ago Report
Poor girl, she'll never make her very important unspecified appointment