Posted by CoffeeGoblin 11 months ago Report

Cool~ TwT

Posted by Loonnyx 11 months ago Report

More to come ;3

Posted by CoffeeGoblin 11 months ago Report

Anything to make the Loli cunny feel good~

Posted by macroflation 11 months ago Report

technically is the loli bumhole, but i very understand

Posted by Hereforvore 11 months ago Report

Using another girl as a dildo/condom and fucking her until she's slurped inside~ What better way to use a loli

Posted by qawsedkre 10 months ago Report

The speech bubble in the bottom left makes it sound very hamfisted. You're drawing a comic and it's clear what's going on, no need to describe what's happening with text.
"This is very intense" in itself would be enough and would help the flow a lot more.

Posted by Loonnyx 10 months ago Report

Thanks for your opinion! Its my firts comic too... So any tips and ideas help me improve.

Posted by Loonnyx 10 months ago Report

and the other pages, what do you say?

Posted by qawsedkre 10 months ago Report

The rest is fine, apart from grammatical errors, but that's a matter of practice. (like on page 13 she says more deep, which should be deeper. More is generally used in adjectives with 2 syllables or more. There are of course exceptions because english is trash.)
I can't say much on the art though, my drawing skills peaked at stickmen. But maybe try skin tones to differentiate the characters? Like slightly different shades of light grey. Don't take it as legit advice though, I'm not sure if it works well on colorless art. The walls on the internals would probably look more distinct if they were darker. (like the pussy on the top right panel here.)

Posted by Loonnyx 10 months ago Report

Thanks! Relax, Portuguese is worse hahaha! I loved your suggestions. I will adopt these ideas more in future work. This comic is purposely simple because of the fundraising at YCH. I held myself back from going into more detail, otherwise I wouldn't even be able to post it...