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In His Custody By ObsidianSnake -- Report

Four privileged young tourists run afoul of local laws.

7.7k words. Another in the Hall of Keys setting.

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Mourtzouphlos

Posted by Mourtzouphlos 9 months ago Report

This reminded me a lot of Bravery Test, at least in terms of structure (teenagers deciding to do something stupid, one of them being the driving force behind the idea, one of them knowing it's a bad idea but not willing to ditch their friends, the "I totally got this", the reality check, the confrontation with imminent consequences shepherded by those with control over the situation).

What is Brenyon? He's described as looking "mostly human" and is specifically contrasted as a "mixed-blood" human as opposed to a "full-blood" human, but we aren't given any non-human details about his appearance, and there hasn't been anything earlier about any sort of mixed species. Is that common? How many species even are there? At first it appeared that there were only humans, but the last batch added canines and this one adds sheep. Are they just normally found elsewhere?

Mourtzouphlos

Posted by Mourtzouphlos 9 months ago Report

I forgot to put this in the first go, but what is a Writ of Seeing? It's compared to a warrant, which is just an official decision to arrest someone, but he states that them being guilty is now officially settled fact, skipping the trial. What's the process for getting one? Anything operating that quickly and without the accused's involvement would seem to have some pretty big and obvious fail points, but they care a lot about society working fairly. Also, "going back to that"? I would think that Besmoroth would really like being able to just declare someone guilty of whatever they wanted at any time. What other system would they use?

ObsidianSnake

Posted by ObsidianSnake 9 months ago Report

Things are revealed as you go, that's how stories work. If I just started telling people stuff about the setting in the notes all the time, it turns into inert trivia.

Like: hags are kinda like nest parasites. You'd probably think, 'okay.' But what if -- and stick with me here! -- it was explored in a story?

Jakakhan

Posted by Jakakhan 9 months ago Report

Just jumping in here, but I love the setting and background in this one. Gives a lot more life and structure to a vore piece. Also, nice to see their hesitation and disbelief as the sentence is carried out without going into full panic. ...all the time at least.

ObsidianSnake

Posted by ObsidianSnake 9 months ago Report

Thanks! This kind of event isn't something that anyone thinks about in this setting, but it also isn't a complete shock that the celestial refractions can do it. That leads to some unique and fun reactions!