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THis is another commission piece where the commissioner wanted some changes made.
I PROMISE, the next thing I post will be new content.
THe alterations include but are not limited to: changed ages of some of the prey, extended vore scenes, and making absolutely every doe but Melody anonymous.
Please let me know what you think.
I'm thinking about trying to do a special story for Halloween; if there's any interest in that, let me know in the comments. Beyond that, go ahead and give me any compliments, crituqes, or complaints that you feel like
Hope you enjoy this heavily-extended story
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Posted by mandarni 7 years ago Report
Hmm, I liked the first version better, with it being much more descriptive. It also left the fate of Melody a bit more "open", if there had been any plans on adding more to the story. It's nice that you keep old versions online, that way nothing it lost.
Posted by Eater99 7 years ago Report
Interesting that you prefer the original. Well, that is exactly why I leave the old versions up!
Unfortunately for Melody, her fate is going to be exactly the same either way; this version just makes it explicit what happens to her in that clearing
Posted by maomix 7 years ago Report
I don't really comment a lot, but I just wanted to say that you're one of the best writers here, especially when it comes to attention to detail. I really love what ya got going here. That's not really specific to this one, but.. Hey, had to do it somewhere I guess. I'm usually not big on the whole women eaten by animals/monsters thing, but you make it work like a champ.
Also, as far as requests and suggestions, the bit at the end of Serpentine Pleasure Cruise in Heaven is pretty top notch, I'd love for more of that kinda thing.
Absolutely keep up the good work
Posted by Eater99 7 years ago Report
Thank you very much! I'm grateful you took the time to write out such a thoughtful comment. And though I'm a bit iffy about it myself, you're not the only one who really liked the "vore heaven" segment, so I may need to have something like that again in the future :)
Posted by maomix 7 years ago Report
I mean, if you're iffy about it, you're not exactly obligated to toss it in. It's your show, the rest of them aren't exactly lacking because it's not there.