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Uploaded: 5 years ago
Views: 4,010
File size: 40.50 KiB
MIME Type: application/msword
Comments: 5
Favorites: 32
Tags: Bad Parenting casual sex Casual vore Child child sex Cub Fatal Female Prey impala Implied Digestion Lion lion pred Male Pred mother prey Oral Sex Oral Vore Rabbit rimming Shota Size difference underage sex Willing prey
Just something short I started writing. Who knows, maybe I'll write a sequel someday
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Posted by Slimshod 5 years ago Report
That was pretty good. Some of the language and dialog was a bit out of place for certain characters and moments though, namely David's choice of words. Otherwise this was a fun read.
Posted by LavenderLapine 5 years ago Report
Yeah, I tried to have him come across as a particularly smart kid, but I’m not sure I did it that well.
Ah gotcha. Ya I think a little more workshopping his word choice and you would have gotten there.
Posted by Nickdavis1844 5 years ago Report
Great job! Loved it!
Really? I didn’t think this was particularly good. I’m glad you enjoyed it!
LavenderLapine: It makes me so happy to hear what people think. Constructive criticism is always appreciated!
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Posted by Slimshod 5 years ago Report
That was pretty good. Some of the language and dialog was a bit out of place for certain characters and moments though, namely David's choice of words. Otherwise this was a fun read.
Posted by LavenderLapine 5 years ago Report
Yeah, I tried to have him come across as a particularly smart kid, but I’m not sure I did it that well.
Posted by Slimshod 5 years ago Report
Ah gotcha. Ya I think a little more workshopping his word choice and you would have gotten there.
Posted by Nickdavis1844 5 years ago Report
Great job! Loved it!
Posted by LavenderLapine 5 years ago Report
Really? I didn’t think this was particularly good. I’m glad you enjoyed it!