Uploaded: 3 years ago
Views: 7,515
File size: 5.27 MiB
MIME Type: image/png
Resolution: 2902x4189
Comments: 4
Favorites: 22
Notice: The story is written by me.
The pictures are drawn by me too . Of course, I used some templates to make it look better.
Please comment
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Posted by ken115 3 years ago Report
The story is hard to follow due to the photos being in the way and other things as well. Yes they are marked but it is hard to know if you need to go down or up or what, plus the writing itself am sorry to say is abit well poor, like a lot of grammar problems and problems with making things go well with the story.
As there is a lot of words that repeat again and again it makes it well not impactful. Sorry if am abit hard but it kind of came off as just a fetish fuelled story that had barely any real feeling to catch the readers interest. The art is alright however and I feel if all the writing problems were fixed it would go well.
Posted by Ngerman 3 years ago Report
Yes, english story writing is definitely not one of my strengths.
Posted by Dukinu 3 years ago Report
well you need a bit of work but this is rare to see this type of work on here keep this up
Posted by Ngerman 3 years ago Report
thanks!