Your as Sweet as Apple Pie
By misterebony
For Pristinecheesecake!
 
 
Zoey was in a good mood, as was often the case these days. Oh it had been on a down turn awhile back. The town witch was pretty isolated from most of the town, most of the kids she had made friends with (and made meals of!) had moved away, and most of the rest were very leery of the witch.
 
But things were different now. The witch with kitty paws, ears, and tail, now had a sort of family, in the form of her husband and housepet Hansel, her adopted daughter and former squirrel Hazel, and her best little friend and treat Tommy. Since the last came into her life things have been getting steadily better, to the point where she was happily doing a lot of cooking again, a favorite thing of witches.
 
Which was why her home was filled with the scent of baked goods. Most of the goodies she would give to the kids or sell at a market. A few she would give to her friends to help them fatten up their own favorite kids meal. She even did stuff for charities, which somehow always met their goal. Hmmm....
 
Anyways, she was in the midst of frosting a triple chocolate cake for the latter case when the phone rang. Zoey wiped her paws and went to answer it.
 
"Hello? Oh yes Mrs. Burton, I am getting those cookies over to you later!..... yes I know you want to give me something, but your cause for cancer is more than worth the effort...... hehehehe.... yes I glad you know about that too..... what?..... oh dear what happened?........ their oven broke down?! Oh that's terrible!....... a special order huh..... 2 of them?
........ that IS a tall order yes...... oh no I didn't say I wouldn't do it dear! You know I will gladly help........ you're very welcome!..... now who gave the order?....... heh heh heh..... and what was it..... yes..... ok I got it. Well no worries Mrs. Burton, I know just who to have help me...... it will be there in time I promise...... yes it is almost like magic isn't it..... your welcome Mrs. Burton, and if you want me to visit any of those poor little cuties let me know...... oh of course. Bye now!"
 
Zoey chuckled. As hard as she made it sound on the phone, she knew two kids who would love to help out. Especially given what was asked for. It was too obvious this time, so much so she wondered why Mrs. Burton hadn't called out the witch hunters. No matter though, she had work to do, and she knew who to ask. She picked up the phone and made a call.
 
****************
 
Not more than a few minutes after her call, the door opened to reveal two forms. One was blue eyed cutie Tommy, and the other was squirrel tailed cuddler Hazel, who had her tail stroking Tommy's back and was snuggled with him. They were at his house for a visit when the call came.
 
"Hazel snuggle cuddle kiss hug love then ring ring call Zoey come help help?"
 
Tommy giggled as Hazel spoke. The former squirrel was still working on talking like a human, though she could if she focused well enough. Considering her kinda nerdy look it was a silly oxymoron he was ok with. He walked in with her and sat down.
 
"I'm so glad you could help." Zoey said as she also sat with them. "See, there is bake sale going on at the children's hospital to raise money for cancer patients. As you know, witches would normally just gobble up any of them who are willing and make them into familars... but how can we cure it if we do that? So, I baked a whole lot of goods for the sale.
 
"Now before you ask I don't need help carrying them. I have that handled thanks to Hansel. But a little bit ago the leader of the sale called me about a special order she got. When she told me what it was I had to laugh, and more importantly who ordered it. But it is the what that is the big convincer that I need you."
 
"Pie cake cookie cupcake muffin?" Hazel said, tilting her head and eying the goodies. Zoey chuckled.
 
"Pie. Specifically two pies. Two.... BIG..... pies."
 
There was silence, then Tommy ahhhed and chuckled.
 
"Someone ordered KID pie huh."
 
"Yes they did. Now the hospital will do that for witches, but they got stuck this time. See, there are no kids at the hospital who know about witches, so none could be used for pies. However, it just so happens I know of two delicious ingredients that would be perfect for pies."
 
Hazel looked at Tommy, then at Zoey. "Tommy Hazel Pie Pie?"
 
"Close enough dear. Your both going to be in pies. Specifically, one an apple boy pie, the other a girl and pecan one. That was the order, in exchange for a huge donation."
 
Tommy smiled. "We'll be glad to help." Hazel nodded in agreement, and Zoey hugged them both.
 
"Thank you both! I promise after you reform I'll make it up to you."
 
Hazel hmmed and her tail swished about. "Squirrel Tommy Hazel snuggle cuddle?"
 
Tommy blushed some and finally agreed. But Zoey shook her head. "Let me think for now. In the meantime, let's make some pie!"
 
And the three set to work. As Tommy boxed up the cookies that had been made already according to type, Hazel and Zoey worked on the dough, mixing flour and butter and a few special ingredients that go well with kids. One the dough was all mixed, Hazel pulled out the first pie pan and, with considerable effort, got it up to the counter. Zoey helped her get the second one, as both pans were as big as she was, with good reason. Each pan was lined with dough, nice and thick so it would be comfy for the main ingredients. One was given a little nutmeg and brown sugar, the other was sprinkled with some ginger. With that done, the group packed the rest of the cookies and cakes, then set to making up the pie filling.
 
Zoey thought it fitting for each of her main ingredients to work on the pie they would be a part of, so Tommy got to slice up some apples while Hazel crushed some pecans. Both had helped in the kitchen before, so by now they were perfect little sous chefs. Meanwhile Zoey mixed the rest of the ingredients for each pie. For the apple boy one she had a cinnamon, sugar, and butter glaze to paint on Tommy, as well as some special black sugar made from witches magic that turned bones into a sort of dough,so there was no waste and the filling would be all gobbled up. Hazels pie also got some black sugar, but her pie included molasses, vanilla, and a touch more nutmeg, plus a little bit of lemon juice to make a gooey mess to stick to and around the girl. Soon all three had their parts done, and they just needed combined into their respective pies.
 
"Excellent work you two!" Zoey said. "Now real quick, wash up so we can get you both in the pie!"
 
As the two nodded and went to wash, the witch cast a spell on the ingredients, freezing them in time. She waited only a few minutes before she heard the two giggling some. Hazel, being the eternal cuddler, likely tried to bathe with Tommy instead of waiting her turn. Zoey could imagine her trying to scrub Tommy with that big bushy tail of hers.
 
Wait. The tail. Zoey sighed and got a big pair of scissors, realizing it would have to come off. That would not be a happy moment for the squirrel as proud of her tail as she was. She REALLY owed Hazel that squirrel session after this one. She waited until they came out. And of course Tommy was first, wrapped in an edible set of coverings specifically for when he was cooked.
 
"OK Tommy. Your up first. Just climb on in and I'll glaze you, and then I'll put in the apples." She released her time spell and began to brush the boy with the sugary sweet glaze. He giggled a little as she worked, humming patty cake as she did, tickling the boy some.
 
"Tommy cute to eat Hazel almost eat Tommy yum yum yum!" The two looked and saw Hazel playfully rubbing her belly and licking her lips. Tommy blushed some, but Zoey sighed.
 
"I might have to let you do that girl... I forgot I have to remove your tail."
 
Hazel blinked. "But.... Hazel tail bushy soft..."
 
"You'll get it back when you reform i promise. But I cannot make a tail edible. So... I need to snip it off. Don't worry it won't hurt."
 
Hazel gulped some and walked over while Zoey finished with Tommy. She handed Tommy the brush to finish himself up on his arms, then went to snip Hazels tail right off at the base. Grabbing some sharp sheers, she put them around it at the base, and cut. Hazel didn't feel a thing, but eeped as she saw her tail set aside. The girl was then placed in the other pie pan.
 
"OK, since I don't have to do any prep with Hazel, both of you lie down and I'll fill in the pies around you."
 
They listened as they laid back, nice and snug in the soft doughy pans. Tommy was prepped first again as he was surrounded by seasoned and sliced apples, covering him up almost completely save for his eyes. He watched as the dough went over him, sealing him in, but also felt as the black sugar began to take effect, turning his bones to dough and his insides into filling. He was an ingredient now, nothing more, and he couldn't move or even breathe as the pie was sealed up. He was even poked once with the knife when Zoey cut the crust for the air holes, but there was no blood.
 
Then it was Hazels turn, as the gooey mixture was put around her. Again the black sugar took effect as it was absorbed into her skin, freezing her in place and softening her bones. Unlike Tommy, there would be no top crust, so her face was surrounded by pecans, then some cream was set aside to decorate the top, so she would look really delicious. Once the top was all smoothed out, the pies were ready for the oven.
 
Zoey put each one in, waving to them both. They wished they could wave back but all Zoey could get now was a smile from Hazel. She shut the door and let them bake, loading up the other goodies for the sale in her car, occasioanly checking on the duo. Once everything else was loaded she used her magic to speed the baking up just a little bit, and when she did she had the two ready in no time, fresh from the oven and smelling just delectable!
They would be at the sale right on time for the buyer. A very special buyer indeed.
 
*************
 
"Oh yum yum yum! They look delicious!"
 
Zoey smiled as she showed the pies to the buyer, a plump dark haired woman wearing German clothes and a chefs hat. Zoey chuckled at her comment and at the two little girls she had with her, who were hungry little cannibals like their dad. They were darker skinned and dressed in a more tribal attire, but still had their moms eyes. And all three looked HUNGRY.
 
The bake sale was already doing well, and the many donations (not just Zoey's) were doing very well. Already the hospital had enough to fund some new research techniques, and perfect a few cures in the experimental stage. But that was before the BIG donation. And the chef witch was delighted to give it seeing the two delicious pies.
 
"Gretel, you always are so greedy, asking for two pies. No wonder your getting so fat!"
 
The witch, of course Hansel's sister, chuckled. "I cannot help it! Kids are just so delicious! Now give me a knife, me and the girls wanna tuck in!"
 
Zoey sighed and handed her a serving knife and the witch set to work, carving both her and her kids some big slices, putting a dollop of whipped cream on each slice. Each of them got a good third of each pie with each slice, and Zoey was not suprised how quickly it was served up, nor how greedily the three ate at the pies. It was just like old times.
 
"Oooohhhhh... so good... the boy is so chewy and go well with apple.... and the girl... .such a wonderfully sweet and nutty flavour.... oh its perfect!"
 
Zoey watched as all three ate. She shook her head at how messy and greedy the three were, just like long ago when Hansel and Gretel were both kids when they first met, long long ago. Course things were a lot different then, since Zoey lived in a home that was much.... sweeter. But it was still fun then, and they had gotten to be friends after that incident, despite some of the bad press from those two jealous brothers. Still it was pretty amazing how things turned out. Who would have imagined Hansel would grow up so handsome and gretel would become a full fledged kitchen witch, a high honor indeed!
 
By the time Zoey came out of her flashback she was stunned to see that the three had eaten the pie quickly, their faces messy with filling, and rubbing huge bellies, and in the case of the two kids being so round they looked like big balls. Gretel chuckled and levitated her daughters up with her magic, who giggled and spoke a thank you in their tribal tounge.
 
"Ahhhhh.... delicious. And they fattened my kids up nicely. They'll be a fine stew for their dad." She winked as the kids spoke a thank you to Zoey this time in a foreign language.
 
"You're all welcome, and thank you for the donations. But please, don't be a stranger. You would be welcome at my house any time."
 
"I have to pass sorry to say. If we came to your place your whole town would be in the cook pot and you know it."
 
Zoey chuckled at that thought, of all the people in her new home town as a feast. She had had admit it would finally give an excuse to use that mass reformation spell, and she and a lot of her friends could all get together to enjoy such a feast. But....
 
She shrugged finally. "Yeah your probably right. But still don't be a stranger. And say hi to the husband."
 
"Will do! And hey, if anyone around you gets too annoying, send them my way and we will eat them all up!"
 
The two shared one last laugh and waved good bye, as Zoey headed for home, already with many plans in her head.
 
But the immediate one was for Hazel. After all Hansel needed supper as well, and a big double decker squirrel burger would fill his belly so beautifully, and would give Hazel a nice, warm, soft place to snuggle Tommy.
 
With that thought in her mind and a slight giggle, she started for home.
 
 
THE END!