Holy fuck it's been a year since I uploaded Part Three lmao. Was this worth the wait? Probably not, but if you still like it then I appreciate you <3.


As to why it took a year...well, that's complicated. TLDR: this thing underwent FIVE re-writes! Every time I came close to finishing it I ended up despising the final product so much I'd scrap it and start anew. This last draft has been a WIP since August or September. At this point I just wanted to get this out because Part Five--which HOPEFULLY will be done sooner--is the climax of the story. Shit hits the fan and we're gonna get an all-out siren vs. witch battle!

Part Five I think will be done quicker because unlike Part Four I've had the storyline for Part Five pretty much nailed down for a long time. There's just one or two scenes I *might* change, depending on how they play out.



Since I scrapped four previous versions, tons of different scenes got cut from the final version. Here's some of them:

1. The group would wander into a minefield of man-eating plants. In some drafts, Kira and Abigail both got eaten and had to save themselves--in another, all five got eaten and, thinking they were about to die, everyone did a "deathbed confession". Libby regretted never remarrying, Kira cried that her child would never grow up and Valerie confessed that she slept with Lien on multiple occasions and liked it. Abigail was not amused.

2. At one point they'd encounter a graveyard of human clothing and trinkets. I like to think that over the millennia many humans have accidentally wandered into Sytheros, with none ever returning because they'd all get eaten within hours. One of the items they'd find would be a Model T in surprisingly good condition; this would lead to Kira going on about her love of cars, complete with her terrible driving record. In one draft I had them restoring the car to use, but I cut it because I figured predators would find them more easily.

3. One draft was going to have a harpy vs. witch fight. All the harpies would be modelled after female characters with bird motifs, including Black Canary, Winnie Woodpecker, Raven, etc. I wanted this scene to make it in, but I wasn't a fan of the fight and realized that it'd make the later mermaid vs. witch fight feel extra. Which sucks, because at the end of this fight the witches took the Raven-lookalike captive after she was severely injured and there were gonna be scenes of her and Kira onboard the Echo that'd help explore Kira's character.

4. The lunch scene had *a lot* of plot points cut because of pacing. One of the ones that I was sad to get rid of was Kira explaining her family history; how her grandmother, mother and aunt had all been eaten by the eight-finned plesiosaur Libby had described back in Arizona. Mercy and Valerie would've both talked about how they lost their families at young ages, too, while Abigail would refuse to speak about what happened to her own parents (Libby had a happy childhood).

5. There were going to be multiple "flashback" scenes involving Kira and Abigail remembering their pasts. Kira's first flashback would've been at the very beginning--so if you feel that first part is a bit rushed/awkward, there's why. A second one would've happened during lunch as part of her explaining her tragic family history. After that we'd get one of Abigail remembering her mother calling out Betty Parris's dad's bullshit and another where she recalled the night she learned that her parents died.

6. The beach scene originally included a bit where harpies would swoop in on the group like the velociraptors in Jurassic Park did in the visitor center. And just like the raptors these girls would've gotten eaten by bigger predators who incidentally save the witches. The first draft involved a giant pelican gobbling the harpies up and the second one had a Welsh Red Dragon doing it, which would be a reference to the Shadow-Walkers story.

7. Speaking of Welsh dragons, another plot point involved the girls stumbling upon a dead one and her nest. Kira would've eaten one of the eggs instantly but the other two would be saved by Libby and Abigail, both of whom were familiar with Lloniffili from Camelot. Abigail wanted the eggs saved for two reasons: 1, because they were efficient siren killers who'd obey their "mother's" commands, and 2, she wanted to give one to Thitis as a gift.



One more thing: this story features the debut of Daphne, a siren who's actually been in my head for a long, long time. Originally she was supposed to be a 'feral/hybrid succubus' who occasionally hung out with the sirens on Sytheros Island: Amber + her sisters, Tenderfoot + her sisters, Sappho, Lapis and Kira/Smaragdosa. Daphne would later play a key role in Kira's presumed death, as she would be the one to tell everyone that Kira had died in the raging storm. To prevent anyone from wondering where her body was, she'd also lie by saying that she ate Kira, which would've enraged some of the inhabitants and she'd flee. Daphne would later meet up with Amber in the modern day and Amber, who was remorseful for her intense bullying of Kira, would try to exact revenge on who she presumed devoured a defenseless siren. I can't recall exactly what I had happening there but I think it possibly ended with Daphne confessing that Kira hadn't died.


As always, I wish to point out that this version of Abigail Williams as well as the planet Sytheros are both creations of HipHugger (https://aryion.com/g4/user/HipHugger). All other characters, including these versions of Elizabeth Proctor and Mercy Lewis are of my own creation.

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