Sunset Special (Commission) by Ani21

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Sunset Special (Commission) By Ani21 -- Report

Uploaded: 1 year ago

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Tags: apple gag Apple In Mouth Cooking dolcett Equestria Girls Fatal Female Female Prey kitchen meatgirl My Little Pony restaurant Sunset Shimmer Unwilling Prey vore society

Some time has passed since graduation and the girls are having a huge celebration at one of the hottest new spots in Canterlot! Unfortunately, the venue is very strict about carding, and as a girl from a whole different dimension, getting a real ID is a lot trickier for Sunset Shimmer than most. There may be another way to attend the party though, but not as a guest as it turns out!

Soft Shaded Comic Commission for Branagain

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Comments

Posted by MerrySue1982 1 year ago Report

It's quite cute. But I think it would make sense to add one or two arrows. The flow of the comic is slightly awkward to follow naturally. I jumped to the wrong picture twice.

It's a hard art to make the paneling feel natural and control the reader to instinctively read it in the correct order.
But even though it's hard to master, it hurts the flow a lot if it does not work.
But I think some arrows are already a good bandaid for the problem.

Posted by KuroNekoChan 1 year ago Report

You do have a point, anyway time to dig in on those shimmering pony hams >:3

Posted by Ani21 1 year ago Report

Out of curiousity, which part is giving you the most trouble with flow?

Posted by MerrySue1982 1 year ago Report

I think it's the third picture. With the "inside oven" picture slightly overlapping into the quarter your eyes are slightly distracted by it while moving into the pre-oiling scene. And especially pulled toward the oven scene if you move out of it. Jumping over the picture underneath it you meant to read next.

Posted by Ani21 1 year ago Report

Ah, I think I see what you mean, skipping from panel 3-5? I think a factor in that might be from the speech bubbles leading the eye to the right rather than down. I just swapped in a new version that should hopefully lead the eye down to panel 4 instead.

Posted by MerrySue1982 1 year ago Report

Yeh that helps a lot. I mean once you know the order it not was that bad of a problem anyway. But considering you might want to do longer comics in the future this could become an issue.

Posted by Ani21 1 year ago Report

I do have multiple 20+ page comic projects completed under my belt already actually lol. But I'm glad to know it helps, I'll have to keep it in mind more often in the future.

Posted by NavigerousVore 1 year ago Report

Absolute banger! Delicious bacon pony becomes a meatgirl! The expressions are gorgeous! ♡♡♡ I'm sure the girls will love tucking into their freind!

Posted by JCPCB 1 year ago Report

Sunset didn’t knew that cooking Scitwi would lead her being cooked

Posted by Ento 1 year ago Report

You know what they say; the dumber the prey, the tastier the meal~

As the sun sets on Sunset, at least she'll be enjoyed by friends! Arguably the best fate she could hope for with us at the wheel.
Speaking of which, I think this might be the prettiest roast you've ever drawn, something about the specific colors, angle, steam, sauce and spices just come together to make something just really nice to look at, in addition to already being juicy and mouthwatering~

(Also, dang, that is a quality restaurant, adding on an additional main course to the party's meal, just cause they had one on hand? They know how to treat a girl right! (Well ok, not *that* specific girl, but in general they do))

Posted by tsukaistarburst 1 year ago Report

Fantastic, I love the expressions. My only negative is that we can't see her face now she's been cooked. I think flipping her round to the other direction would have been even better so we can see that anguished expression and empty eyes <3

Posted by Dx8771 1 year ago Report

I hope we get to see everyone’s reaction in a later piece of art