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A draconic merchant runs afoul of the surprisingly digestible plan of a cult to end the world.
Also like, my first male pred ever.
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Posted by Stalbon 6 years ago Report
Very lovely indeed! Alas, I will say that I'd love to have seen that cock and sac put to more use, but there's room for that in another tale, I'm sure. :)
Posted by Talaria 6 years ago Report
Don't worry, they'll see plenty of use next time.
Posted by Mage24365 6 years ago Report
I don't understand what Ledaine added to the story. She's a Mary Sue that was entirely irrelevant to the plot.
Why is she there?
Posted by Talaria 6 years ago Report
I guess the proper and correct response is "Mistakes were made."
I made some minor edits to add a more acceptable reason for her to back down at the end.
Posted by Mage24365 6 years ago Report
I think you misunderstand. The question I had was, "what does this character add to the story?" Because right now she's just... there, and detracts from it. (This is coming from someone who is reading this as a one-shot.)
Posted by Stalbon 6 years ago Report
While I can't speak for the author's reasons, I myself saw Ledaine as something of an audience surrogate. It's true that she could have been replaced by...say, a kidnapped townsperson? Ultimately, I don't know. As the story on the whole is pretty light-hearted, I took her appearance in a somewhat comical manner, and saw her as a tongue-in-cheek way of keeping the audience abreast of the other half of the plot.