Posted by Imrhys 14 years ago Report

Blinks. Ponders. Considers reading again, just to get it all solidly in mind's eye, before commenting further...

Posted by Squidia 14 years ago Report

Well, I've been following this thing all week, and I really must comment. I seriously hope you've posted this thing in other places, because a masterpiece like this deserves to shine somewhere more than a fetish board.

This story was... amazing. I say this with a critical eye. The characters were endearing, incredibly deep, and the pacing was wonderful. It's not afraid to flitter around and play in the setting a bit, but it's not slow by any means. From the start, I enjoyed following Coryn's exploits. She may be the most powerful force on the planet, but this story proves just how far one can take that concept without degenerating into Mary Sue. Coryn builds on the Isharan setting and offers a fresh, alien perspective that makes the setting that much more wondrous by highlighting all its quirks and oddities.

Setting the story in Prime was a nice move. I find the demons often steal the show in Isharan literature, so it's nice to see the characters be almost exclusively humans and monsters, as it shows just how far one can develop a story with just these elements.

This was definitely a character driven piece, so Coryn's magnificent power was a helpful plot device that helped keep the story rolling, rather than bogging it down as one might expect. At no point did it devolve into wangst or anything that failed to keep my interest. It may be a long story, but I was glued to the screen the whole time, so all that means is that it's doing its job.

Really, what more can be said? This was a wonderful and amazingly done story. This is the sort of thing that comes to mind when I envision what I want in an adventure/fantasy story.

One thing I have to applaud especially is that the story had heavy usage of fetish elements, but *never* let them bog down the story, or come off as overly gratuitous. It was always moved by the characters more than anything, and the story never seemed to stop or pause to get a sexy scene in. When it got such scenes, they were relevant to the story without losing any carnal appeal. And really, that's as difficult as task as it is fruitful.

The story was emotionally driven from start to finish, and really touched something in me. The ending especially, while unusual, was the perfect resolution. Not contrived or cliche or anything. It tied up every last loose end perfectly, and kept the door open for continuing adventures. It left me wanting more without leaving me unsatisfied. I think that's the greatest thing a story can do.

Posted by sansuki 14 years ago Report

Gosh, not sure what to say- I am blushing. Thank you for the high praise, but I am sufficiently unsatisfied with this myself to want to air it around anywhere else.

Posted by sansuki 14 years ago Report

UPDATE: If you want to read what I think I did WRONG while writing this- i.e., self criticism- then go here:

http://aryion.com/forum/blog/sansuki/index_b-6962.html' target='_blank'>http://aryion.com/forum/blog/sansuki/index_b-6962.html

It also has character inspiration pictures!

Posted by Monopolus 14 years ago Report

You gotta publish this thing like..outside of this site. It was that amazing.

Posted by xThunder 14 years ago Report

I started reading this some time ago when chapter 5 was out. ever since I've been waiting for updates, I realy liked this story. The hints of a second adventure leaves me craving more :D

Posted by Cerolas 14 years ago Report

Simply beautiful. Duatmef's work has served as an inspiration to many of us, the detail, the breadth of it. But this story? A marvelous homage, integrated into that larger picture, exceeding it, taking a life of it's own, while acknowledging where it came from. Thanks Sanuski.

Posted by oldman40k2003 14 years ago Report

A wonderful ride, this story was.

Posted by MrNobody 13 years ago Report

Nice refrence to how Duamutef seems to have dropped off the face of the Earth in real life.