The Bounty of Pepper LaFlare
The spotlight turned to the top of the circus tent, illuminating the Flareon as she stepped out onto the raised platform. There would be nothing but a firm piece of rope between her and a twenty-five foot drop onto the ground. As she stared down to remind herself just how up high she was she could a Simisear tugging at the chains of a wild Charizard who desperately wanted to take flight.
“Always a father’s duty to keep the boys off his daughter, am I right ladies and gentleman?” the ringmaster laughed, getting a nervous chuckle from the audience as he finally secured the last chain. “We’ll get around to taming him soon, but how about we take a small break and watch Pepper’s amazing tight-rope walk?”
She offered the Charizard and apologetic look, though she doubted he could see it given how high she was. The band of clowns begin the drumroll, and slowly she took her first step onto the rope. [i]Nice and easy.[/i]
She took another tentative step, her stomach tightening as she stared straight ahead. She couldn’t look down. Looking down meant falling, and falling meant- ….she shuddered at the thought. No, it wouldn’t happen. It wouldn’t come to that. She just had to keep going.
The audience held their breath as she continued along, slowly starting to pick up her pace. She didn’t want to remain balanced precariously on the rope for longer than she had to. She regretted not bringing a pole; she always practiced with one. The rope seemed to go on forever, the only way to know how far along it she was was to look down.
[i]Shit.[/i]
Vertigo hit her like a Poliwrath. She could feel her head spinning as her heart leapt into her throat. The rope seemed to sway violently, and she struggled to keep her footing as the Charizard’s wings spread out behind him, preparing to take flight. The last thing she saw was her father’s horrified expression as her paw slipped and she fell off the rope, hurtling towards the ground.
[i]SHIT![/i]
The patterned top of the circus tent grew gradually further away, she could hear children screaming and their mothers trying to comfort them. The sound of leathery wings filled her ears, and as she rolled herself in the air she found the Charizard had broken loose and was flying towards her, determination in his eyes as he opened his jaws wide.
[i]shitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshit![/i]
She closed her eyes, terrified tears falling from her eyes as she fell towards his open maw. She just had to remember her training, remember how to get out of this. Remember everything her father had taught her about performing, about falling. As her head met the Charizard’s everything seemed to slow down, allowing her an eternity to stare into the maw that would catch her from her fall.
[i]I’m going to die..![/i]
* * *
Pepper awoke with a start, but immediately regretted it as the pain she had fallen asleep to escape washed through her. Her paw moved to her head, willing the headache away as she looked around her musty tavern room. She had arrived around midday and collapsed, and judging by how dark it was it seemed to be night… though with the sounds of revelry slipping through the cracks of her door, not [i]too[/i] late at night.
She rolled herself out of bed, grabbing her fedora as she did so and placing it on her head. Her whole body ached as she opened the door and made her way down the stairs, the sounds of music, drinking and laughter only growing louder the closer she got. It was like the three groups of noise were competing to silence the other two, and none of them would give in until they got what they wanted.
She made her way through the tavern and took a seat at the bar, having to jump a little to get onto the bar stool. She flagged the bartender down with a single wave of her paw, “Cinnamon whiskey,” she ordered.
“In your state? I’d have to call the town doctor… Or the mortician.” the Zangoose replied, continuing to idly clean the mug in his hands with a cloth that looked like it would only serve to make it dirtier, “Listen lady, you came in here earlier ready to collapse, and I ain’t in the market for fur rugs.”
“You should’ve seen the other guy.” Pepper smirked, leaning over the bar as her fluffy tail raised to keep her balance, “But I guess you will be when you clean the chamberpot.”
“You can clean it yourself.” The Zangoose grumbled in response, turning to the shelf behind him. After a brief sip of coffee to keep himself going he took a bottle off the shelf and poured what little remained of its contents into a glass before placing it before the Flareon hard enough to spill it. “That’ll be 20P. The room’s 500.”
“Five hundred? That room was a sty!” she growled, taking glass and immediately lifting it to her muzzle. She took a sip, and immediately lowered her ears and glared over at the Zangoose as she raised her glass to him, “and I’m sorry, I asked for whiskey, not whiskey-flavoured water.”
“Can you blame me for watering it down? You had most of it for lunch. Take it or leave it.” The Zangoose said as he went back to his work, cleaning the single mug in his paws, “And before you say it, I know; ‘I should’ve had [i]you[/i] for lunch.’” he rolled his eyes, “Hilarious..”
“Aw, only a few hours together and you already know what I’m going to say. That’s so romantic.” The Flareon smiled, her voice dripping with sweet sarcasm. She put the money for her room and drink on the bar before tugging her hat down to conceal her face, “You haven’t mentioned my arrival to anyone, have you?”
“There’s a reason you’re paying 500 and not 200 for the room, lady.” The Zangoose uttered, lowering his head to avoid the other patrons hearing their hushed conversation, “I haven’t told a soul I saw you walk in, no one wants to deal with the shitstorm that seems to follow you around.” he narrowed his eyes, “Everywhere you go, drinking and fighting. Bottles getting smashed, tables getting broken, chamber pots getting annihilated...”
“Oh my god, I’ll empty my chamberpot! ...Arceus.” the Flareon rolled her eyes at the list of grievances. She finished her glass before pushing it forward on the bar, allowing the Zangoose to take it and put it with the other glasses and mugs, “If you hate me so much, why did you let me stay at all?”
“Well, that’s easy,” The Zangoose replied, smiling for the first time that night as he slid a second glass of whiskey over to her. He picked up his own cup of coffee and offered to clink glasses with her. “You’re Pepper LaFlare.”
The twin doors to the tavern burst open, finally winning the battle of the noise that had been going on in one single bash. The inn dwellers fell silent, the music stopped and the Pokemon held their breath, the only sound was a particularly loud Electabuzz snoring drunkenly under a table.
The crowd slowly parted, forming a clear path between the newcomers and the bar. The Charizard took the lead, with a Wartortle following after him nervously. “[b]Pepper LaFlare![/b]” the Charizard roared out, causing the crowd to back up and give them even more space to maneuver. Pepper’s eyes fell to the golden guild badge resting on the Charizard’s chest, worn as a necklace with a string.
“I thought you said you didn’t tell anyone,” she hissed at the Zangoose.
“[b]I[/b] didn’t. Must’ve been Silas.” the bartender replied, thumbing at the unconscious Electabuzz, who stirred as he heard someone say his name only to roll over and fall back asleep.
“Goddamn it, Silas.” the Flareon muttered, her eyes returning to the two Pokemon. She took a long sip of her whiskey as she stared down the oncoming Pokemon, “What do you want, boys? I’m not in the mood.”
“We’re here to take you in,” the Charizard replied, a toothy grin crossing over his muzzle as he reached back towards the Wartortle, who awkwardly offered him a sheet of paper. His clawed hands snatched it off of him so fast it seemed as though he might tear it, and he brought it to his eyes to read it out loud.
“Wanted; Renegade Flareon, Pepper LaFlare, for crimes against the guild.” the Charizard cleared his throat as he began the list, “Stealing a valuable treasure, unlawful and reckless endangerment of rescue Pokemon, assaulting a rescue team, evading capture, public indecency-”
“Heh..” the Flareon smirked at the memory. The Zangoose behind the counter blushed as he caught her eye… wow, that story really had travelled around. She gave him a wink and tipped her hat before turning her attention back to the bounty hunters.
“Last time you were seen you leaped off the roof of a burning building. Rescue teams had the whole town on lockdown and searched the debris looking for you… but you still managed to slip through their claws.” The Charizard noted, his eyes narrowing on her, “If I weren’t so pissed off I might actually be impressed. No Pokemon could survive that fall.”
“What can I say?” Pepper replied with a little shrug and a smirk as she finished her drink and offered the empty glass back to the bartender, who had already taken cover behind the bar, “I’m good at falling.”
“And now you’re going to be falling into a jail cell…there isn’t enough P in the world to bail you out of your crimes.” The Charizard sneered as he thrust the warrant back towards the Wartortle, causing his partner to fall over from the force,
“Jeez, all this because I stole one stupid treasure?” the Flareon raised an eyebrow at him, “You idiots are the ones causing all that damage chasing me down. I’m just trying to live my life and you guys keep showing up to start a fight.”
“You going to give the treasure to the guild then?” the Charizard asked, his arms crossing over his doughy belly.
“Fuck no, it’s my treasure. I had to fight a legendary to get it!” the Flareon snapped, one paw resting on the bar while the other moved to her bag to guard its contents, “If you wanted it so bad, maybe you should’ve found it before I did.”
“All treasure goes to the guild first, LaFlare. Then they decide what you get to keep. That’s the rules.” the Charizard narrowed his eyes on the Pokemon, “But even after the Guild takes their cut, I’m going to be able to retire on your bounty…. 200,000P.”
“200,000?” Pepper’s eyes widened at the number, “Huh… I thought it was fifty. It’s gone up a lot since the whole ‘destroying Guild property to escape’ thing. Hell, I’d turn myself in for that much.”
“You can’t claim your own bounty,” the Charizard replied, cracking his knuckles as he approached the bar, “And for the record, it [i]is[/i] fifty… if you’re dead.”
“Aw man, that’s just plain rude.” the Flareon mumbled as she slowly stood up on her stool, trying to be the same height as the Charizard, “Well, I hate to tell you this, big guy, but you’re not getting that bounty. You can leave now and keep your dignity, or I can send you crying back to your guild with your tail up your ass.”
“I think you mean ‘ with your tail between your legs,’” the Wartortle pointed out, continuing to hide behind the Charizard.
“I know what I mean.” The Flareon replied, her eyes locking onto the tortoise. He took a nervous step back, his hands raised in submission. Good, they weren’t [i]both[/i] idiots. Now she just had to deal with the Charizard. He loomed over her, his wings spreading out to block her escape as he glared down at her. “What’s your team called, buddy?”
“Team Scald.” The Charizard replied gruffly.
“Oh, cool.” the Flareon said, resting back on the bar as the paw resting on the bar slowly reaching backwards across it. “Then it’ll be ironic when I do [i]this[/i].”
Her concealed paw launched forward, the contents of the cup of coffee she was holding splashed over the Charizard’s chest, causing him to leap back and rapidly pat himself down. It was enough for Pepper to leap up onto the bar and reach into her bag, taking out her one-handed crossbow. With her free hand she took out a Ganlon berry, which quickly shifted into the shape of a bolt that fit perfectly into her crossbow. “‘Scald,’ get it? Glad you didn’t have a reasonable team name.”
“Ha, so there’s the notorious Natural Gift,” the Charizard growled, wiping the coffee away from himself, the flame of his tail blazing with anger, “Not exactly the most normal way to use that move… most Pokemon just power up the berries and toss ‘em.”
“I’m not most Pokemon.” Pepper replied, her eyes shining with determination as she levelled the crossbow on the Charizard, “I’m Pepper Motherfucking LaFlare.”
The Charizard snarled, breathing out a jet of flames towards the bar. The Flareon was quick on the draw, firing the sky blue bolt at the ground. The Ganlon bolt created a wall of ice as it struck the floor, holding off the flames long enough for the Flareon to leap off the ice, the Charizard’s head and the Wartortle’s shell before finally landing on the floor.
“Hey, no fire near the bar. It’s covered in alcohol, you’d have this whole place up in flames.” Pepper yelled as she turned to face the Charizard, reaching into her bag and taking out another berry.
“If that’s what it takes to bring you in, I’ll do it!” the Charizard snapped, shoving the Wartortle out of the way with a single clawed hand as he breathed in, preparing another jet of flame for the Flareon.
“You’re going to get someone hurt!” the Flareon growled, glancing around the tavern to make sure the customers were okay. To her surprise, she found that most of the tables had been flipped onto their sides, forming barricades around the room. Pokemon sat behind them, some trading money and taking bets while others snuck around the corners of the room to the bar to get a drink for the show. [i]Assholes.[/i] the Flareon thought, though the embers dripping from the Charizard’s maw caught her attention just as he opened his jaws wide to release the inferno held behind them.
Pepper tossed her crossbow and hat under a nearby table as the flames washed over her fur. After a good ten seconds of roasting, the Charizard shut his jaws with a smirk, waiting for the smoke to clear. “Ha… that’s what I thought.”
A sharp, shooting pain filled his backside, causing him to roar out as he reached back and yanked the offending item out of it. He brought it around to his front to inspect it, only to have the berry bolt explode on him in a jolt of sparking electric power. “Grraah!”
“Don’t use fire on Flareon, buddy.” Pepper’s voice called out, causing the Charizard to turn. The Flareon grinned as she reloaded her crossbow, taking aim on her opponent again. “It just makes us stronger.”
The Charizard didn’t respond, instead he brought his wings back before flapping them forward, sending a gust of wind towards the Flareon. She staggered, struggling to keep her paws on the ground as he repeated the process, buffeting her with his wings before finally she flew back and landed against the bar.
He let out a roar, his arms outstretched and his claws glowing with draconic energy as he rushed towards her. She rolled out of the way to avoid the first swipe, then ducked to avoid the second. “W-woah, you’re actually pretty good.”
“You’re at a disadvantage, Pepper. You need distance to win a fight.” The Charizard grinned knowingly, his tail smacking into her side and sending her flying into the barrier of tables. “Up close you’re dead meat!”
The Flareon grunted as she landed, her head hitting the wooden surface of the table. She could see the Charizard racing towards her, his claws glowing as he prepared for another strike. She fired an ice-blue bolt at the ground before him, creating a slippery patch of ice that left him falling onto his front, his jaws inches from her feet.
“Boop.” she grinned, pressing one of her feet onto his nose, though she quickly retracted it as he snapped at her. Pepper leaped onto his head, slipping between his wings just before they came together to crush her. She landed on the flaming tip of his tail, snuffing it long enough for him to let out a roar of pain before swinging it hard enough to launch her up into the rafters.
...but she didn’t come back down. The Charizard got to his feet and glared around, breathing out a jet of flame to melt the ice before smashing his foot down on the slush that remained. “Get out here, LaFlare! I’ll burn this place to the ground with you inside it if I have to!”
“Y-you can’t do that! This place is my livelyhood! It’s my home!” the Zangoose shouted from behind the bar.
“He won’t. I’m up here, shit-for-brains.” Pepper called. The Charizard’s attention turned up towards the upper balcony of the tavern. The Flareon stood there, twirling her crossbow in one paw and adjusting her hat with the other, “You going to fly up here and get me, or would you rather keep harassing the Pokemon you’re meant to be protecting?”
“How about you jump down from there before you hurt yourself, LaFlare.” the Charizard called up to her, his jaws widening to show off the dark passage to his throat, “I’ll catch ya! Probably the best way to transport you back to the Guild, if you even make it that far.”
“Heh… it’s kind of funny you should offer that.” The Flareon replied as she idly trailed her paw along the side of her crossbow, caressing it with the tenderness one would show their first love, “Back before I stole the treasure, before all of this… I was in a circus. I worked as an acrobat, my dad taught me how to walk a tightrope.” she began. The crowd hushed and stared up at her, listening to her story... It almost felt like the spotlight was on her for the first time since she had become a renegade.
“He didn’t like safety nets… he said it killed the suspense, that there were more interesting ways to break my fall,” she went on, smiling fondly at the memories, “We had this Charizard, Donovan, who would pretend to be wild and feral… he was part of a taming act my dad liked to do. He’d always do that act just before I was set to go on, just in case I needed him.” she closed her eyes, “I’d fall, Donovan would break out of his bonds, fly up and catch me in his jaws. The clowns would make him spit me out and I’d make a one-liner about needing to wash my leotard. Everyone gets a laugh, no one gets hurt.”
“Only… I didn’t much like that idea.” she opened her eyes once again, her eyes turning to the Charizard, “Why should I be the one getting eaten? Because I’m a girl? Because I’m a Flareon?” she shook her head with a little sigh, twirling her crossbow as she walked along the balcony, balancing perfectly on the edge. “So, I talked with Donovan privately and came to a conclusion that suited us both… a new trick.” she grinned, placing her crossbow in her bag as she gazed down at the Pokemon with her deep blue eyes, “A trick which I think I’m going to get a chance to do right here, right now, for our wonderful audience.” she winked at the crowd.
“If you’re thinking about running, you can forget it.” the Charizard growled, his wings spreading as he prepared to take flight. “You may think you’ve got the upper hand because you’re faster, but you just screwed up, lady. Now I know where to go if you get away again.” he smirked, his claws clenching into a fist, “I’m sure your little circus friends could help me find you… and if not… well, the guild jail could use some entertainment.”
The smile faded from Pepper’s face. The Zangoose behind the bar desperately tried to get the Charizard’s attention, but the damage had already been done. A chill filled the air as the Flareon silently fumed… until finally she lowered her gaze down to the Charizard, giving him a sultry smile. “Open wide.” she said, leaping off the balcony and down towards the Pokemon. The crowd gasped in astonishment, watching as the Charizard opened his jaws wide to catch her.
Pepper’s opened wider.
The Charizard’s head disappeared into the Flareon’s body, its bulge immediately becoming apparent as his snout hit the wall of her belly. The crowd gasped in confusion, while those more knowledgeable of the Flareon’s feats laughed in delight. His Wartortle sidekick could only watch slack-jawed as Pepper looked up at him, winking as she took her first gulp.
The Charizard began to stagger around, flailing his head as his hands reached up to try to pull the Flareon off of him. She gulped again, bringing the tips of his wings into her muzzle as her paws moved to his arms, pinning them to his sides as much as she could. He let out another muffled roar of protest, his tail lashing and coming dangerously close to starting a fire with its flaming tip.
Pepper leaned forward, causing the Charizard to topple over and land on his back with a thud. That’d make things easier. Now that he was pinned beneath her the Flareon started taking earnest, rapid gulps, taking in the smoky flavour of his scales all around her Pokemon began to hand money to the winners of the bets that had taken place, it seemed like a lot of Pokemon had bet against her… she was definitely making [i]someone’s[/i] night.
She was down to his fat belly before she knew it, finding the male quite muscular. He must have been an experienced adventurer.. her eyes turned to his partner who was still paralysed from shock. She waved at him and gave the bulge of the Charizard a tantalisingly slow rub before taking another heavy gulp, locking eyes with the Wartortle the whole time. It wouldn’t be long now, the Charizard’s stomach was already halfway into her maw, and she was showing no signs of stopping as she packed her fellow fire-type into her cramped and seemingly elastic gut.
Past his belly, down past his kicking legs. The bulge of the Charizard had lifted Pepper off the ground, though she hardly cared. She wagged her tail, showing off her stomach to the patrons as she closed her mouth around the Charizard’s feet and slowly began to slurp up his tail.
“H-hey, Stop!” the Wartortle shouted, grabbing onto the Charizard’s tail and trying to drag him back out of the Flareon.
[i]Took you long enough.[/i] Pepper thought to herself, but it was somewhat of a wasted effort given how deep his leader was. She slurped up the tail like a noodle, gulping occasionally to keep it moving as the Wartortle drew closer and closer to her lips. Finally he had to let go to avoid getting eaten himself, and Pepper opened her muzzle to allow him to watch as the flame of the Charizard’s tail disappeared down her throat, its light slowly fading into the darkness of her esophagus.
“Y-you ate him…” The Wartortle whimpered in terror.
“Woah, really?!” Pepper gasped in fake astonishment, her wide eyes turning down to the huge bulge of the Charizard beneath her, “Oh man, Would you look at that! I thought we were just playing pretend.”
“B-but, how? Why?” He gasped. He could hear the groans of his leader, watching as he tried to writhe and struggle in his tight space, though any progress he made was immediately undone by a rubbing orange paw or a little belch. The Flareon rested on her gut, despite it being three times her size she didn’t seem the least bit queasy from her large meal.
“I’m a Circus freak.” the Flareon explained simply, giving her gut a pat. “As for why, like I said… I didn’t like being the one to get eaten.” the Flareon continued her earlier story, hoping that her gurgling, shifting stomach wouldn’t distract her audience as she kneaded it, “But Donovan did… so we made a new plan.” she closed her eyes, listening to the muffled roars and protests of the Charizard, barely audible beyond her loud stomach, “I’d trip off the tightrope, he’d fly up to catch me… then I’d eat him in mid air and use him to break my fall.” She patted her stomach. “The audience loved it. It was so unexpected.”
“But me being a freak doesn’t stop at eating things three times my size,” the Flareon continued, her paw trailing over the outline of the Charizard’s head before pressing her paw to his nose and forcing him back into the mass of indiscernible fat beneath her. “I’m surprised this wasn’t on my wanted poster… endangering rescue teams? Public indecency?” she scoffed, wiggling her hips playfully as she smirked down at the Pokemon, “And yet they don’t even mention I can digest my prey in ten seconds.”
“Y-you’re bluffing.” the Wartortle mumbled, barely audible to the Flareon from her throne atop her bloated, bulging belly, “That’s impossible. It doesn’t even make sense!”
“Circus freeeak~” Pepper reminded him in a singsong tone, her paws circling on the areas of her gut she could reach, “But if you don’t believe me, I can show you my old grand finale.” she winked, “Might want to step back, unless you want to get burned.”
He didn’t know why, but he couldn’t argue with her. All he could do was step back and watch. Pepper took a deep breath, her stomach seemingly going into overdrive. The roars of the Charizard were overpowered by the growling, gurgling sounds of digestion coming from inside of her. Her gut shrunk rapidly, collapsing in on the Pokemon inside of it as her paws pushed at the bulges the Charizard made, aiding her stomach in packing him down into nothing.
The moment came to exhale, and she did so with a belch that shook every glass in the tavern. The hot, rancid air escaping the Flareon brought with it a huge flame in the shape of a roaring Charizard, spreading its wings as though it were about to take flight. The patrons [i]oohed[/i] and [i]aahed[/i] at the sight… the Wartortle was, once again, stricken and slack-jawed at the sight.
Finally the belch came to an end, and the Flareon’s stomach was only a little bigger than when the Wartortle had first seen her. She perked her ears, swiveling something around in her muzzle before looking around the room. She found her target in the far corner, and she spat the Charizard’s used Reviver Seed through the air, landing it in the spittoon with a satisfying ‘ping’.
The crowd roared into applause, tables were turned back the right way up as Pokemon laughed over what they had just seen and congratulated the Flareon on her successful battle. Pepper smirked, taking in the praise and waving to her newfound fans as her eyes locked onto the Wartortle, “You’re lucky he had a Reviver seed.”
“This is only going to make your bounty higher, you know.” the Wartortle reminded her, stuttering and stammering as he tried to keep himself from running away in fright. “More Pokemon are going to come after you. They’re not going to stop until you’ve been caught.”
“What I’m hearing is ‘free lunches forever.’ I think I’ll manage, sugar,” the Flareon chuckled, her eyes lidding casually as she turned to head back to the bar. The water-type couldn’t help but notice that despite his first glance she seemed much… curvier now. Her asscheeks bounced with each step she took, and her stomach swayed gently between her legs with each step. “Oh, don’t forget to pick up your leader, alright? Make sure to tell him ‘thanks for dinner’ from me.” She laughed as she walked away.
The Wartortle grimaced and went to the spittoon, staring into the mixture of murky fluids that filled it. Somewhere down there was the seed that contained his partner, the seed he would revive from. He cringed, reaching one hand out towards it… only to move it away. If he was going to do this he’d need a strong drink first.
He was fairly certain the Flareon wouldn’t mind the chance to spend the evening teasing him about his partner’s fate, though he knew that by the time his leader had reformed she would be long gone, off on another adventure to grace a new tavern with her presence or steal a treasure right out from under the Guild’s nose… the elusive renegade, Pepper LaFlare.
Posted by TootCore 7 years ago Report
Ferals getting curvier are a neat lil' thing. -u-
Posted by TastyTales 7 years ago Report
Hehe, I do enjoy writing about them <3
Posted by Mage24365 7 years ago Report
Holy crap, this was amazing. Instant digestion and small preds are the best.
Posted by TastyTales 7 years ago Report
Glad you enjoyed it! Pepper is a lot of fun to write, I'm hoping to use her more in the future.
Posted by delete39hbf 7 years ago Report
did she digest the charizard at the circus? cos im imagining that's how she got her bounty.
Posted by TastyTales 7 years ago Report
She probably digested him after the story. As for how she got her bounty in the first place? The answer to that lies in the Spice of Life series... though the short answer is that she stole a valuable treasure x3
Posted by delete39hbf 7 years ago Report
i was thinking about the first half of the story were she was still at the circus do that performance. because in my mind i was thinking when she ate Donovan she accidentally discovered her power to digest prey super fast, accidentally digesting her friend, thus leading to her bounty.
Posted by Lemon-scentedBiscut 7 years ago Report
now that's a pretty neat trick >:3
Posted by TastyTales 7 years ago Report
One of her favourite acts! I'd love to do more with her, rogues and renegades are so fun to write x3
Posted by BirbleBuddy 7 years ago Report
Hee, really liked this one on a character level. Lots of personality, and good ol' pulp fiction cheese. Pretty damn fun, I approve!