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Commission - Blowing off Steam (story) By 4ofSwords -- Report

Uploaded: 13 years ago

Views: 6,825

File size: 88.00 KiB

MIME Type: application/msword

Comments: 12

Favorites: 47

Outside the sauna door her footsteps stop, and so does the beating of my heart. A golden palm outlined in green presses up against the frosted glass, and I shiver from the anticipation. The door swings outward.
"There you are, Linda. Beautiful."
My heart starts again, beating like a hooptie bass speaker in my chest. She says it like 'beautiful' is my name, like I own the word, and I don't even feel like she's patronizing me.

Commission story for ShyGuy9. ~8400 words, F/f sex, oral vore, scat

This was a really fun commission to write.

Comment on Commission - Blowing off Steam (story)

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Comments
Shyguy9

Posted by Shyguy9 13 years ago Report

Again, I love it! I'll be reading this story for a long time to come. <3

Also, you've really inspired me to keep working on the intricacies of Sophie and Belinda's relationship.

4ofSwords

Posted by 4ofSwords 13 years ago Report

Excellent! Though it looks like you already had quite a bit of subtlety in your comic. :) It seems like you've put a good bit of thought into giving them believable, different personalities and backstories.

miranda_dragon

Posted by miranda_dragon 13 years ago Report

Sophie has a lot of qualities I like and I feel my characters tend to have some similar themes. But, the relationship with Belinda really adds a lot of depth that I think my characters are missing.

My characters feel so much more flat by comparison...though you do have a knack for expanding them and giving them life.

I don't think I'm going to get over this struggle any time soon.

miranda_dragon

Posted by miranda_dragon 13 years ago Report

I've just finished reading this and I'm not sure I can formulate how incredible this was properly.

Wow...

4ofSwords

Posted by 4ofSwords 13 years ago Report

<grin> Well, I'm glad you liked it!

Imrhys

Posted by Imrhys 13 years ago Report

I second these comments ^^

French_snack

Posted by French_snack 13 years ago Report

Ah, beautifully written! The prose is smooth and captivating. The expressing of the characters' emotions is excellent - vivid and convincing; simple yet powerful.

4ofSwords

Posted by 4ofSwords 13 years ago Report

Thank you very much!

Indighost

Posted by Indighost 13 years ago Report

Well written, and I have to say this has to be one of the best scat scenes I have read on this site. I'm surprised and very pleased :) Others seem to enjoy the story as well.

4ofSwords

Posted by 4ofSwords 13 years ago Report

Thanks! :)

Zyrian

Posted by Zyrian 8 years ago Report

Well now I'm sad, and a bit upset that the girl was led on like that.

Zyrian

Posted by Zyrian 8 years ago Report

It was still well written though