Archive > Birichino > Roommates > Takeout
Expand
Add to favorites | Full Size | Download
< < Previous   Next > >
Takeout By Birichino -- Report

Uploaded: 1 year ago

Views: 1,011

File size: 64.00 KiB

MIME Type: application/msword

Comments: 8

Favorites: 19

I've discovered I slow down a lot when I have to write dialogue that isn't fun. Still, it's not all easy living with -or being- a predator...

Does this one even count as vore?

Comment on Takeout

Please login to post a comment.

Comments
YepMcNope

Posted by YepMcNope 1 year ago Report

Hoo boy. That ending got me pretty good.

I was a little skeptical of the drama between the two at first -I'm normally not a fan of conflict via misunderstanding- but in this case I think you did a good job of framing a single situation through multiple different viewpoints.

It's an important reminder that while they're getting closer, they're really not quite on the same page yet about things. It also gave them an opportunity for some important solo reflection.

Maggie continues to be adorable. Her fascination with the workings of Rosemary (on top of being a good excuse to keep up the exposition lol) is a fun quirk with interesting long-run potential. And the fact that she can even take the mighty S'Mary down a peg is impressive. I suspect that we've not seen anywhere near the last of her.

Great stuff!

Birichino

Posted by Birichino 1 year ago Report

It's an awkward situation! And territory it's not all that fun to write for, but like you said, I felt was important to cover for their relationship to really be stable.

Maggie's a fast learner. She may not be strong or fast, but her social skills are on another level, as well. She's got her own life going on as well, but yeah, she'll be around if they need her.

TheMysteriousSadSack

Posted by TheMysteriousSadSack 1 year ago Report

I like how up in the air maggie's status was for a while there. I do hope we get to see Sages past sometime in the future, the glimpse we did get seemed pretty crazy already.

Birichino

Posted by Birichino 1 year ago Report

I'm really glad to hear that it wasn't COMPLETELY obvious she'd be fine. And I'll admit Sage's past isn't totally worked out yet, but I've got an idea...

RDRW

Posted by RDRW 1 year ago Report

This story gets better with every chapter!

I'm curious about Sage's backstory now. Like, apparently people usually don't know about predators existing. But Sage already knew when he met Rosemary. I wonder how..

Birichino

Posted by Birichino 1 year ago Report

Thank you so much!

Well, secret as it is, it gets talked about fairly casually. If you're near enough conversations, I wonder what you might pick up...

Matteo42

Posted by Matteo42 1 year ago Report

Yeah to be honest, curtains are a vital sign of how a relationship is going, in my opinion. If I had any drive for it, I would write a whole book about how different curtain shapes/colors/patterns mean different things, like how specific flowers means specific things.

Great story though :D
I'm really enjoying it!

Birichino

Posted by Birichino 1 year ago Report

Well, it's the thought that counts, right?

Thank you, though!