Art by Toonvasion, and the story was a trade for him. I'm trying doing the story in the description here, let's see if it works.

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A bus rolled up to a lonely little bus stop in the rundown part of town. There was technically a whole neighborhood left, but the residents in this part of the city didn’t have much need for public transit, so this was the last stop for the bus. The doors rattled open and, after a moment, the suspension of the bus squeaked and compressed. The whole vehicle tilted as something lumbered up to the door. A pudgy leg poked out, followed by a pear-shaped body that was so plump it didn’t actually fit through. The glossy pink hide, not so much scaly as scale-patterned, squeaked like a balloon animal as a hefty body squished through the doorway and wobbled back to shape. It was a dragon. A toon dragon–as if there was any other kind in the real world. Though she’d gotten her fair share of sideways glances from riders earlier on in the bus route, here she wouldn’t warrant a second look. This was toon town. It was exactly where Dee the Dragon belonged.

“So long! Mr. Bus Driver!” she said sweetly, waggling her fingers with the sound of a twiddling xylophone. “Thanks for stopping at the burger place!”

The driver waved at her and shut the door. She sighed deeply and took in the sites of the thriving little town full of toons. A leather clad vulture toon with impossibly high heels was leading a horse toon on all fours, a leash in her hand and a smile on her face. A shabby looking wolf in a trench coat whispered to a weasel in fishnets with too much makeup and a weary expression on her face. She muttered something about cash up front. He produced a five dollar bill and she slipped it into her cleavage. Satisfied with the transaction, the wolf opened one side of his trench coat and just stuffed her inside. He tipped his hat to Dee as the front of the trench coat wobbled and heaved with the motion of the recently acquired prostitute. She smiled and waved to him as well.

“Good to be back in town.” He blinked a few times and scratched her head. “Now why did I come here again?”

As if as an answer, her belly rumbled once, then bulged with what looked to be a pair of clawing hands. She hiccupped demurely, and blushed, purring appreciatively with something a bit more lewd than simple satisfaction at a big meal. She absentmindedly patted her tummy with the hollow thunk of an over-inflated beach ball and tweaked the place where a nipple would be on the vaguely feminine curve of her chest. Another wobble and bulge caused her expression to sour and her face to tint green.

“I think my stomach is disagreeing with me,” she said.

She reached behind her back and produced a little sack labeled “barf bag.” She slipped it over her mouth like a muzzle and produced a sound somewhere between a yawn and a belch. The bag bulged obscenely, then burst in a cloud of paper shreds. A flesh and blood human tumbled to the ground. She looked dizzy and irritated, with some oddly vibrant red and yellow stains on her t-shirt and leggings and a pickle slice stuck to her cheek, but was otherwise none the worse for wear.

“Oh! Jane! Fancy meeting you here!” Dee said, reaching down to help her up.

“Fancy meeting me here. You ate me on the way here,” she snapped.

“Did I?” she said, tipping her head.

She puckered her lips and swished her tongue around in her mouth, then shoved her whole dragony paw into her maw and pulled out something light blue and wadded up.

“That would explain these, then,” Dee said, holding out the wad.

It unfurled into a pair of panties. Jane looked at them, then looked down and snuck a thumb into her waistband to glance inside her leggings. Her eyes widened.

“Give me those,” Jane said, snatching the panties from her. “How did you even get those off me without getting my pants off?”

“If you want to get all of the flavor, you need to be really good with your tongue.”

Jane shook out the panties and then glanced about. “I had a purse.”

Dee looked down and grabbed her round belly. She gave it a shake and was treated to the sound of something rattling around inside.

“Tell you what. I’ll open my mouth real wide, and you see if you can reach it,” Dee said, her eyes swirling a bit as she pitched the idea.

Dee leaned forward, but before she could open wide, Jane wrapped an angry hand around her muzzle, causing Dee’s eyes to bulge and her tongue to roll out.

“Don’t. You. Dare,” Jane rumbled. “I’ll deal with the purse later. Now come with me. We’re getting this taken care of.”

She released Dee’s face and it wobbled back to shape. The only difference was a heartbreaking look of shame and a decidedly watery and puppy–dog look to her eyes.

“You’re mad at me.”

“You’re darn right I’m mad at you. I keep telling you not to eat me and you keep eating me.”

Jane stalked forward, trying to focus on the street signs and storefronts and ignore the madcap debauchery going on around her. It wasn’t easy. Toons were hardwired to be hard to ignore. A flickering anime hologram sang a catchy song and tried to lure her into an electronics shop. A barber yanked a poodle woman into a salon as she walked by and strapped her to a chair, giggling manically as he clicked on an electric clipper. But she kept her eyes on the end of the street, where her target was waiting for her. All the while, Deed tottered along behind her, tugging at her fingers and looking ashamed.

“It doesn’t feel good when you’re mad at me,” Dee said like a scolded child.

“It doesn’t feel good to be eaten,” Jane countered.

“It does so!” Dee defended. “I made sure I sucked and slurped and savored you the whole time. And the way you squirmed, plus the way you tasted right when I slipped my tongue in your–”

“We’re not talking about it,” Jane said quickly, blushing and glancing about.

“But it’s so fun to think about,” Dee said dreamily. “Your tasty, meaty body slipping and sliding against my tongue, sliding deeper with each little gulp…”

Dee released a sultry huff. Jane turned to see that the dragon was stroking her chest and murmuring lewdly to herself.

“Cut it out!” Jane said. “You get all weird and sexual when you talk about it.”

“All I’m saying is you can’t blame a dragon for wanting to eat a damsel now and then. It’s why we’re here.”

“You aren’t a dragon. You’re a human named Dee who got a toon milkshake dumped over her and started looking like a dragon. And so we’re here to visit the toon clinic to see if they can undo what they did to you.”

“If you want…” Dee said, eyes starting to look a bit hazy as she gazed down at Jane’s hustling form.

She leaned her neck low and tottered along behind her. Sniffing and snuffling at the scent of her friend.

“You know you smell really tasty,” Dee murmured.

“Dee, don’t.”

“Just a little taste?” she whined.

“Control yourself, Dee.”

“But your flavor…”

“Dee!”

“Your soft, wriggly form sliding down my throat…”

The dragon tottered a little faster until her round tummy bumped against Jane from behind. Jane tried to jog a bit faster, but Dee hooked a paw in front of her and gently held her against the dome of her tummy, dimpling its soft surface with her body.

“I’m serious Dee,” Jane grunted, struggling.

Dee dreamily pressed her tighter, sliding her up along the curve and hugging her tight against it so that Jane’s feet dangled while the dragon continued tottering forward.

“I feel so empty without someone to eat.”

“You’re not supposed to eat people!” Jane grumbled, fighting in vain against the pink arms gripping her.

She glanced down and saw the tip of Dee’s tail squish out from between her legs and subtly waggle to and fro. Jane could only imagine where it was rubbing, and why.

“But it I need it,” Dee said. “What good is eating if there’s no squirming. What’s the point of eating something that can’t enjoy it?”

“I don’t enjoy being crammed into your mouth!”

“Oh… Oh! But I have other holes! I don’t mind which we use, so long as you end up inside me. Here, let me just…”

Dee lowered the paw pinning Jane to her crotch, causing a yelp and a blush. A bit of rubbing that slid Jane’s butt all over Dee’s belly eventually found the divot of her belly button. A slow, steady push, accompanied by a sound like a cork being pressed into a bottle, started to ease Jane’s butt and hips into the dragon’s navel, folding her in half while the dragon purred and squirmed.

“So filling…” she murmured, shifting her paws to rest on Jane’s shoulders to ease her deeper. “Just a little deeper…”

“We’re here! Stop! We’re here!” Jane said.

Dee stopped and glanced up at the sign of the building before them.

Toon Clinic.

In her distraction, Jane wriggled free of her belly button with an audible pop.

“Come on! Let’s get you fixed up,” Jane said.

***

Jane stumbled into the clinic and looked around. She didn’t know what she was expecting, but this wasn’t it. A cartoon dog sat on two seats, the top half on one and the bottom half on the other. Some sort of an animated tiger had a perfectly round hole through his torso. A snake with some rather impressive breasts and a set of pouty lips had knots tied in her tail while the rest of her body sat like a coil of rope. There were creatures wrapped in bandages, smoking like they’d been burnt to a crisp, and sucking on big glass thermometers that looked ready to pop. The wall opposite the chair sported a mirror that made the somewhat cramped room feel somewhat less so. There was also at least one toon in the room, a cute goth with tiny fangs, that didn’t have a corresponding reflection. Offsetting this was the cartoon rabbit that seemed to be in a very agitated argument with his reflection. (The reflection was winning.)

At the end of the room was a window with a stereotypical “sexy nurse” sitting behind it. She was chewing gum and filing her nails.

“Excuse me, I have a bit of an emergency,” Jane said. “You see, my friend–”

“Take a numbah, sweetheart,” the nurse said, snapping her gum.

Jane glanced beside the window. There was a deli-style number dispenser. She grabbed it. Number seventy-three. Now serving, number sixty.

“I’m kind of in a hurry,” Jane said. “My friend here, she gets hungry, and–”

“Please have a seat until your numbah is called,” the nurse said.

“I’m sure we won’t have to wait long,” Dee said brightly.

“But there’s not even enough seats left,” Jane said.

“We can share one!” Dee said, scooping her up to once again dimple her into the dome of a big, round belly.

As Jane squirmed like a toddler who didn’t want to be picked up as Dee tottered back and flopped onto a chair that wobbled and creaked under her weight. For a minute or two, Dee just sat there humming pleasantly to herself, cuddling Jane like a teddy bear. Then came the rumbling of her tummy.

“Um… Jane?”

“No you can’t eat me, Dee,” Jane said firmly.

“But… isn’t that what friends are for? I can’t just let you sit there and go to waste,” Dee said, raising her up from her belly, arms pinned to her sides by the dragon’s pudgy paws.

“It’s not wasteful to not eat your–”

“Not when you could be a nice warm morsel,” the dragon purred.

Jane couldn’t turn around to look her friend in the eye to try to talk sense into her, so she looked at the reflection. It quickly became clear that there would be no talking sense into her. Not with those eyes. Already huge and adorable, the eyes had now taken on a decidedly wild look. Multicolor concentric circles were radiating out from her pupils, like she was in some sort of trance.

“I’m a human being, Dee, I—” Jane said quickly.

“Right. Exactly. A tasty, meaty human being…” she murmured, sliding Jane back and forth across her chest.

“That’s a reason not to eat me.”

“But what if I do it real sexy… It’s already pretty sexy, right? Eating someone out, right? That’s a human thing. Humans like that…”

“No! That makes it even more icky.”

“Just a little lick,” Dee said, reeling her tongue out.

“Not so fast!” Jane said. “This is neither the time or the place to–”

“Not so fast? Oh, you want it slow? Why didn’t you say so?” Dee squealed, as though she’d finally figured out what the problem was.

“Dee, no!” Jane yelped.

But it was too late. Dee lolled her tongue out fully, all three glistening feet of it. The thing wrapped around her waist with a warm, moist curl and slurped her butt-first between the dragon’s lips, once again folding her in half with her upper body and lower legs dangling out of the dragon’s mouth. Dee’s eyes rolled back in her head dreamly as she slurped at her friend’s butt. Nibbling her and sucking her like a lollipop. The plump thighs of the dragon rubbed together in a horny, squirmy sort of way. For twenty minutes, Jane just bobbed a few inches in and out of her friend’s mouth, acting as a pacifier to keep the toon semi-sane. She couldn’t do much but squirm every time she noticed she was sliding deeper and try to ignore the incredibly talented tongue that was lovingly savoring and tasting her, while Dee made sensual huffs and half-moans. The toons one by one were either allowed inside or engaged in a gag with another toon that left them in no condition to receive treatment. Around the time the vampire girl had used the snake woman to hogtie the rabbit and spank him while his reflection hooted and hollered in approval, the nurse stepped back from the window.

“Thee?” Dee said, pushing Jane aside to ‘talk with her mouthful. “Ithn’t thith nithe?”

“It’s humiliating,” Jane said, hoping Dee didn’t notice the blush in her cheeks and the flutter in her voice.

The door opened and the unnecessarily sexy nurse stepped out with a clipboard. She glanced at it. “Numbah seventy-three?”

Jane’s face brightened. “Right here! Right–”

*POIT* *SQUISH*

Dee, almost like it was an afterthought, casually reached up and poked Jane’s head, sliding her the rest of the way into her mouth. The tongue swirled and swished her about, rubbery toon teeth gently teasing at her, until she finally heard the muffled voice of the nurse.

“I’m afraid patients can’t chew gum in the doctah’s office.”

Jane heard, and felt, a rumbling whine from Dee. The maw around her tightened and Dee spat her onto the exam table. The human, strangely dry considering how juicy the mouth had felt, was breathless and blinking in the sudden brightness. It took her a moment to get her eyes to adjust. When they did, she was suddenly and thoroughly beside herself with frustration. On one hand, the sexy nurse was pulling on a rubber glove and reaching onto her cleavage for a tongue depressor. On the other hand, the “doctor” was quite familiar. A semi-translucent red vixen that looked like an animated sex toy, installed in the wall of the clinic like one of the assorted dispensors.

“You! You’re the one who turned my friend into a toon!” Jane growled.

The vixen was in a decidedly more ‘normal’ configuration than she was last time, if such a thing could be said of an animated sex toy. When Reddy was running the food truck, she’d been twisted up and installed in the wall of it like a piece of modern art, her butt sticking out directly beneath her head and boobs in a position that would have made a contortionist jealous. She was still like that, but at least now she looked like she was trying to appear to be medical-professional-adjacent. Rather than being completely naked, she “wore” a doctor’s coat (it was draped over her shoulders) open, with nothing underneath it and one of those odd reflector-headbands that hadn’t made sense for a doctor to wear since the invention of the lightbulb. She wore a baggy green elbow-length rubber glove on her tail.

“I remember you. The milkshake lady. What seems to be the problem?” Reddy said.

“What do you mean? You turned my friend into a dragon.”

“And?”

“What do you mean ‘and?’ Is that not enough?”

“Ain’t nothin’ wrong wit dragons, lady.”

“There is when she wants to eat me all the time.”

“Ain’t nothin’ wrong wit that neither. Dragons is supposed to eat people.” She shrugged. “But you came to see the doctor, so I might as well start the checkup. Nurse! Check da vitals.”

“Yes, doctah,” the nurse said, strutting up to Dee.

Jane scoffed and sputtered, unable to believe what was going on.

“Wha– You– You’re not even a doctor!” Jane said.

Reddy put her tail on her hip and glared at her..

“What’re you insunuatin’. I am so a doctor. I paid for my diploma fair and square.”

She pointed with her tail to a frame on the wall, where there was indeed a degree. The original name had been scribbled out and Reddy had been written in. Notably, it was a veterinarian’s degree.

“Even if I ain’t, you ain’t gonna find another doctor in toon town, so make with the symptoms, lady.”

“I… But you…” Jane took a breath. “Fine. She’s a toon dragon who wants to eat everything.”

Dee nodded with a grin. Reddy raised an eyebrow.

“And? Whaddaya want outta her? That’s what dragon’s is for!” Reddy said. “Is she sick or somethin’?”

“She’s not even supposed to be a dragon! She’s supposed to be a human.”

“Look, if she ain’t what she’s supposed to be, you take that up with her, not me. All I do is sell the goods. It’s the folks who use ‘em who decide to roll the dice and take what they get. Your friend there wouldn’t be a dragon if she didn’t kinda wanna be one. I ain’t in the business of makin’ new toons who don’t wanna be toons.”

“Don’t you dare blame this on Dee. Just fix her.”

Reddy huffed an irritated breath. “Fine, let’s waste our time treatin’ a perfectly healthy dragon. Nurse, how about them vitals?”

“Working on it, doctah!” the nurse said, tugging a blood pressure cuff out of her cleavage and strapping it on to start taking readings.

As the standard medical checks commenced, Jane tried to reason with the so-called doctor.

“You can’t honestly believe that Dee wants this.”

“I ain’t sayin’ she came to town thinkin’ ‘Lemme see if someone’ll make me a dragon!’ And even if she did, she’d’ve been barkin’ up the wrong tree. The last thing a toon’ll want is an extra full-time toon. But what I’m sayin’ is, for the right kinda person? Bein’ a toon is a dream come true.”

“Turn around and let me take that tem-pri-cha,” the nurse said, followed by a *FOONK* sound and a bashful gasp from Dee.

“She’s a mindless eating machine!” Jane said.

“No. She got a mind. It just ain’t good for nothin’ but eatin’.”

“What’s the difference?!”

“Take a deep breath, sweetie. In and out,” the nurse said.

A swirl of rainbow smoke rolled past Jane, like a fairy godmother had granted a wish. Evidently Dee wasn’t a fire-breather, she was a rainbow breather.

“The difference is, I bet sometimes you get all anxious and junk. Don’t know what to do. Worried about this and that. Not me! And not your friend there. Any time she got a question in her head, ain’t but two answers when it comes to figurin’ out what to do. One, eat somethin’, and two, find someone to watch her eat somethin’.”

“Now open wide and say aaaah,” the nurse said.

“That’s no way to live!” Jane said.

“Beats stayin’ up nights worryin’. And it ain’t like she’s hurtin’ nobody.”

At the distressingly familiar sound of a slick cartoony throat gulping, she turned to see the long, high-heel clad legs of the nurse dangling out of Dee’s mouth. She slurped them up and gulped them down, kneading her chest with both paws as she purred with obsessive arousal.

Dee hiccuped. “Just what the doctor ordered.”

“See? What about that?” Jane said.

“No harm done,” Reddy said. “Plenty of other nurses in the phone book.”

The fox rummaged through a nearby drawer with her tail and produced a thick book of yellow pages. She opened it, turned it face down, and gave it a shake. After a few healthy headbutts on the back of the book, a nurse precisely identical to the first came tumbling out of it. She got up and dusted herself off.

“So how’s the dragon?” Reddy asked the nurse.

“How should I know?” the nurse said.

“She’s in perfect health,” came the muffled voice of the first nurse. “Though she might have an upset stomach if I have anything ta say about it.”

Her belly rippled and bulged with assorted bits of angry nurse anatomy. All of the commotion dislodged a belch from the dragon. A sparkling rainbow poofed from her maw and a twirling nail file launched out. The second nurse caught the file and started working on her nails.

“I’ll be helpin’ the other patients if ya need me,” she said.

“Gimmie that back, ya’ thief!”

Well-manicured fingers poked out from between the dragon’s lips and her jaws were stretched open to reveal the angry original nurse, who reached out and grabbed the ponytail of the second one, yanking her hip-deep into Dee’s maw. Another contented gulp sent the second nurse down where the first had gone, and the sounds of a scuffle filtered out of her jiggling, bulging belly. Reddy sighed.

“Look, your buddy here’s causin’ a staffin’ issue. So if I solve your problem would ya get lost?”

“That’s all I’ve been asking for this whole time,” Jane said.

Reddy pulled open a drawer and started digging through it with her tail. Every few seconds she’d toss aside a ludicrously large and heavy object that had no place in a doctor’s office. As anchors, kitchen sinks, and anvils started to litter the floor, she continued talking.

“So this dragon keeps eatin’ you, yeah?”

“Yes.”

“And that’s a problem on account of you ain’t a fan of bein’ eatin’, yeah?”

“Obviously.”

Reddy tugged a strange, rubbery lump until it popped free of the drawer and revealed itself to be her onahole of a sidekick, Wet.

“That’s where you got off to! Ya goldbrickin’, sandbaggin’ lazybones.” She peered through the translucent body of the sexy-toy-toon. “OH, there it is.”

She chomped her jaws onto Wet’s nose and hauled the whole rubbery toon through a curl of her tail like she was trying to squeeze a golfball through a garden hose. A medicine bottle popped out her rear end and wobbled to rest on the counter. Reddy tossed Wet aside and handed the bottle to Jane.

“There. That’ll fix ya up. Just do me a favor and wait ‘til ya get home, wouldja?”

“But what about your nurses?” Jane asked.

Dee belched. Two nurses’s hats and a rainbow-stained high heel flew out.

“They’re gettin’ a crash course on internal medicine,” Reddy said.

***

The bus ride home was a quiet one. Not many people made the trip back and forth to Toon Town, so they had the whole back of the bus to themselves. Dee’s unfailingly sunny disposition was unusually muted. She had her eyes on the little paper bag containing the medicine.

“Oh, so now you’re willing to behave yourself,” Jane finally jabbed.

“What’s the medicine gonna do, Jane?” she said softly.

“It’s going to make you a person again.”

“Dragons are people,” Dee defended.

“You know what I mean.”

“Why don’t you like me like this?” she said.

Jane grumbled. “We’ve been through this, Dee. We’ve been through it almost as many times as I’ve been through you. Besides. You should be happy. Back to normal.”

“But… What if I don’t wanna,” Dee said.

“You just think you don’t want to because the tooniness is messing with your head.”

“But it’s so good, Jane. It feels so good,” Dee said, wriggling her pudgy thighs.

“Yeah. I assumed it did, or you wouldn’t keep doing it.”

“No. Not eating you.” She twitched. “Okay, yes eating you. It’s so cozy and kinky and tasty and squirmy and…” She shook herself. “But not just the eating part. The you part.”

“What do you mean?”

“A dragon eats. It’s what a dragon does. But a toon performs. And there’s no sense performing without an audience.” She slid a little closer. Jane slid a little further. “This, all of this. It’s part of it for me. The cat and mouse thing. The pred and prey. I live for it. You know I could never hurt you for real, right? Then I’d lose you. I’d lose my own personal audience. I’m your toon.”

“You’re my friend, Dee.”

“I can be both! We experimented with being more than just friends in college!”

“Dee…” Jane said with a blush, glancing about to make sure they weren’t heard. “It’s weird to hear a dragon talk about that stuff.”

“Dee the Dragon. Now come on. Let’s have a hug.”

Jane raised her hands as Dee stood and spread her arms, her big toon tummy looming large in front of her.

“Oh, no. No no no. Every time you put those hands on me, I end up sliding down your throat or in some sort of hole that doesn’t even have anything to do with food. No hugs. No kisses. No belly buttons or whatever.”

Dee stood still, eyes squinted. They had a faint copy of that same wild look, but she almost seemed to be deep in some complex calculation. Her eyes suddenly widened with an audible “ding”. They were now flashing with singled-minded madness. She turned about and raised her tail just in time for Jane to realize she’d failed to cross off at least one significant orifice.

“No, no! Not your b–”

*SQUEEEEP-FUMP*

The warm, smooth butt of her dragon “friend” pressed down upon her face and after some light pressure, her face popped through. After a long, squeaky journey that felt like she was being slid into a rubber sleeping bag, she felt Dee’s pudgy thighs settle down onto her own, like the dragon was sitting on her lap, but with her upper-body inside her rather than behind her.

~~~

Dee giggled gleefully to herself as she felt the form of her friend sliding deeper. She wriggled her butt against the bus seat and gazed down at the pair of kicking legs that were slowly squidging deeper. She poked at the wiggling feet and adjusted herself, popping them fully inside. Once she was left with a squirming filling, she burped lightly and sighed, like a junky with her fix, on paw stroking her chest, the other rubbing her belly and periodically nudging between her legs. Yes, the angry grumbles from somewhere in her gut would have to be dealt with eventually. But until then? Bliss.

She did Jane the favor of climbing the steps up to their apartment before a hiccup and a belch sent the human flopping onto the couch. Jane shook her head and sat up, then fumbled until she found that her purse had come along with her, and so did the bottle of medicine.

“How does… The Logistics don’t even… Does that even count as eating me? You shoved me up your butt!” Jane raved.

“You ended up inside me. That’s what mattered,” Dee explained.

“Well, it’s not going to matter anymore, because you’re taking this medicine and we’re putting this whole madness behind us,” Jane said, tearing open the bag with the medicine in it.

“I tried putting you behind me but you still got mad,” Dee countered.

“Don’t you start with the technicalities. You are a menace with those technicalities and literalities.” Jane held up the jar. “It says, ‘Instructions and whatnot under the label.’ That wording sure fills me with confidence.”

Jane peeled the edge and unfurled what turned out to be a scroll at least thirty feet long. She scanned through, jumping a few yards along each time. “Reddy Medical Group is not liable for… yeah, yeah, yeah. Side effects may include… You’re a toon, not a concern. To avoid upset stomach, take with food.”

“Oh!” Dee said, tottering forward.

“Don’t even think about it! Here we go. Apply to problem area. That’s all I need to know.”

She popped the cap. Dee dejectedly lowered her head, ready to get the dose of treatment that would rob her world of all of its crackly, fizzling excitement and clarity. Jane turned it upside down… and nothing happened. The human angrily slapped and thumped the side of the bottle.

“Come on, come on. It’s heavy enough. There’s definitely something in there,” she growled. “Was I supposed to shake it first?”

Jane tried six more times to dump the contents over Dee, then stepped back to fight with the jar without having to do it with her arms extended over Dee’s head. Ever helpful, the dragon snatched up the long list of instructions. She glanced over the long list of legalese.

“Let’s see. It says here: Symptom: The lady got a problem wit bein’ eaten. Treatment: Make it so she ain’t got that problem no more.” Dee looked up. “I don’t know if this is for what you think it’s for…”

She turned her gaze to Jane just in time for her to break one of the cardinal rules of cartoons.

If something isn’t coming out of something it should be coming out of, don’t look inside.

In the long legacy of hunters’ jammed rifles and mysteriously uncooperative bottles of ketchup, the moment Jane looked into the bottle, it erupted its contents all over her. A goopy, incredibly vivid tan substance splashed thickly over her. She coughed and sputtered, dropping the jar and stumbling back. The thick stuff seemed to cling close to her body as it oozed down, tracing out a very, very hourglass-shaped figure. Hands so thickly covered with the gunk they’d ceased to look like anything but rounded spatulas smeared her hair back, producing two long ponytails that stuck out behind her head like horns. She smeared her face, curling her hand around her nose and trying to squeegee the stuff off. Her face merely elongated, then snapped back, nose now long and ending in a brilliant, spherical red tip.

The stuff finished trickling down her, revealing bright shapes and designs along her now perfectly form-fitting tan bodysuit. A pair of the perkiest boobs Dee had ever seen were tipped with a diamond and a spade where the nipples should be. Her cleavage, shoulders, neck, and face revealed green flesh that was shiny as wet paint. Her eyes twitched, then popped, one after the other, into dazzling, heart-irised ping-pong balls of zany delight. Another two pops at the ends of her “ponytails” now revealed them to be the twin horns of a jester’s cap. A manic grin split her peach-colored lips, and with a final startling *SPROING* frizzy gray hair popped out into a waist-length mass with a perfectly straight line across the bottom.

Where once had stood Jane the human now stood–

“Zany Jane The Jester Seal, at yer soivice,” Jane announced between lunatic giggles.

Dee clutched her pudgy paws together in delight.

“Oh my gosh, you’re gorgeous!” Dee squealed.

Jane moved toward her in a blur, throwing her flipper-like arms around her and dipping her like an old school hollywood leading man.

“You ain’t so bad yourself, toots!” She said, wagging her eyebrows.

She planted her lips on Dee’s and gave her a toe-curling smooch. She trembled, suddenly sizzling with titilation. Her pink face shifted to red. Jane’s feet fluttered her up off the ground and her own face turned red. The jester’s horns fizzled to flame like a pair of burning fuses. When they reached her head, there was an explosion of rainbow smoke and fire that threw them apart. Jane shook a layer of multicolor soot from her body and fanned herself.

“Wow, what a dame! But ya got a nasty case of rainbow breath. Must’a given’ ya heart boin. This oughta do da trick.”

Jane produced a seltzer sprayer and stomped on Dee’s foot. The Dragon’s mouth opened like a trash can lid. Jane sprayed seltzer down her throat until colorful steam hissed out her ears and her already tubby belly wobbled and sloshed like a water mattress.

“There. That hit the spot, didn’t it,” Jane said.

Dee wavered on her feet and hiccuped, suddenly seeming a bit punch-drunk. She leaned forward, eyes half-lidded. “I’m less thirsty. But I’m still a little peckish.”

“Whaddaya think I am, toots? A waitress?” Jane asked.

“I think you look more like an entree,” Dee said, licking her lips.

She gaped her mouth open, ready to swallow up the new toon. Jane yanked her head out of harm's way, but Dee lunged forward and ended up chomping her toony teeth right onto the perky boobs of the jester. The room filled with the trilling *SQUONK* of twin bicycle horns. She stumbled back to reveal deflated, sad-looking boobs, then squeezed her nose a few times to reinflate them. She buffed them off and put her flippers on her hips.

“Listen, dragon-breath. Hands off the moichendize.” She produced a huge bag from behind her. “Now if it’s a sweet tooth you got, I got somethin’ in here that’ll do the job.”

She dropped the bag behind her and turned, bending at the waist to put her butt directly in the face of the hungry dragon. Dee’s eyes glazed over, swirling with the manic craving lines at the two perfect cheeks presented to her.

“Here we are,” Jane said, removing a huge cream pie.

Before she could put it to use, Dee grabbed her by the thighs with one paw and the back with the other, folded her in half, and crammed her armpit deep in her mouth.”

“Anybody tell you, you got eyes bigger than your stomach, sweet-cheeks.”

Dee grabbed the pie from Jane’s hand, then stuffed her head into her mouth and sucked, slurping the scrabbling arms up like noodles. She chewed, eyes rolled back in delight, and was already eying up the pie for dessert when her head suddenly tilted back and, with the sound of a car jack, her jaws started to ratchet open.

Jane emerged from her mouth, doing a split to jack the jaws open. She snatched the pie out of Dee’s hand and held it up away from the yawning maw below.

“Listen, Greedy Guts. I’m a sexy Jester. Dat means there ain’t but two things I do. Screwball antics, and regular ol’ screwin’. Last time I checked, gettin’ eaten up ain’t in neither of those categories.”

Dee’s gaping mouth watered and she gazed up at the spread legs of her would-be meal. A fiendish thought came to mind. She licked around the rim of her mouth, teasing each of Jane’s feet, then reared her tongue back and jammed it square between the legs. With a slithery slirp, it eased nicely into the barely hidden sex lurking beneath the jester suit. Jane’s eyes rolled in her head like slot machines and came up double hearts.

“Gettin’ eaten out, on the other hand. That’s right up my alley,” Jane said with glee.

She released a pleasure-drunk, manic giggle as she was flailed this way and that like a poorly performed hand puppet. After a few seconds of being slurped and swung about, she reached down and grabbed hold of Dee’s lips. She raised both legs and crammed them down Dee’s throat, the better to more deeply impale herself on the dragon’s skilled tongue. She flopped forward, laying on Dee’s lower jaw and hugging her arms around it, then started humping the tongue like a piston. The jester’s insane grin practically wrapped around her head as the jester horns gradually curled up, her green face pink with arousal and exertion.

As she humped herself silly, each thrust rammed her a little deeper into Dee’s throat.

“Come to ma’ma. Come to ma’ma, come to ma’ma,” she huffed until her jester horns spun out straight again like party favors and she erupted into a rush of satisfied giggles.

“Dat’s da stuff,” she breathed before simply sliding down Dee’s throat and hitting bottom with a bounce.

Dee sighed with equal satisfaction, as though she’d just had as potent a climax as her meal. She drummed her fingers on her belly and licked her lips. She hiccuped once, then her belly rumbled. A window-rattling belch spilled from her lips, bringing with it a cloud of confetti. She slouched and licked her chops again.

“Finally, a proper meal.”

She sighed, one hand idly groping her chest as she picked her teeth with her claw. A small flower dropped from her teeth, bounced off her belly, and hit the ground with a squeaky toy-toot. It rumbled in place for a second, then a poof of hair and twin jester-tassels appeared from behind it. Amid much wriggling and bouncing, various limbs and other bits of anatomy popped out from behind the flower and Jane stood back up to her full, voluptuous height, now with the flower pinned to her outfit right over her heart.

“Well, sweet-cheeks? It’s been a little slice of heaven, but a jester ain’t nothin’ without an audience. Toodles, toots.”

Dee’s expression twisted with anxiety.

“Y-you’re leaving?” the dragon said.

“No hard feelin’s, you’re a dynamite dame. But a human audience you ain’t. I got itches what need scratchin’. And them claws ain’t cuttin’ the mustard.”

“But, but…” Dee’s eyes lit up. “At least let me get a whiff of your flower!”

Jane’s eyes flashed mischievously. “If you insist, toots.”

The jester leaned forward, stretching her outfit forward so the flower was within sniffing range. Dee’s nostrils flared as she took a dainty sniff. The jester reached behind her own back and squeezed something. A stream of pink liquid sprayed out of the flower and struck Dee in the face.

“Gotcha! Oldest trick in the… book?”

As Jane reveled in the execution of a gag, Dee reached up with her paw and pressed her thumb to her other nostril. She snorted good and hard, a rush of breeze sucked Jane’s chest forward, lodging a boob in Dee’s nostril. Dee reached down with her other paw and started practically clawing at her own mono-boob as she snorted again. Jane’s boobs popped inside Dee’s nose, then her whole upper body slurked in. Her legs and booty wiggled and wriggled for a moment before the dragon snorted once more and fully inhaled them.

She flopped back on the floor, squirming and panting.

“You feel so good. Every hole feels so good when you slide into me. Trapped inside. Struggling, writhing… you belong inside me,” she moaned, breathless and entranced by the raw exhilaration of fulfilling the fetish that defined her.

She twitched for a moment, then her nostril flared and a flipper-like hand came out holding a pepper shaker. It sprinkled some of the stuff and Dee started to gasp and snort.

“N-no. I’m not r-ready to… to… ah-choo!”

Jane rocketed out of her nose and struck the ceiling, pancaking with the force of the impact. After a moment or two stuck to the ceiling, the disk peeled away, then rattled and spun on the ground like a coin before Jane was able to pop herself back into shape.

“Gotta give you credit. You got a nose for fun, but enough’s enough,” Jane said. “There’s folks to entertain, toots.”

“Wait! Wait,” Dee said urgently.

Dee climbed to her feet and tottered forward.

“Don’t you… don’t you want to keep playing?” Dee said.

“A dragon’s insides don’t fit the theme, sugar-scales. The only tight place a clown oughta be is in a car with a couple dozen other clowns.” She tilted her head, her manic grin widening and her wall-eyed gaze pulsing with heart-shaped irises. “Maybe chuck a couple humans in there. Warm bodies, close quarters. Rubbin’ and squishin’ against me… I gotta go.”

“But, but… I know you felt the ‘audience’ sort of feeling with me, because I absolutely felt it with you!” Dee said.

“Toons ain’t a proper audience, you dopey dragon dame,” Jane said.

Dee tottered forward and grabbed her by the shoulders. For the first time since she’d become a dragon, her eyes had the flash of genuine clarity.

“L-listen, Jane.” She huffed. “We weren’t always toons… I can remember if I try really hard. So can you.”

The pair made eye contact. One of Jane’s swiveling eyes locked onto Dee’s. The other, after some insane darting, did the same. The pulsating hearts of her irises started to round off again, easing closer to the look of proper eyes.

“I… I think…” Jane began.

*POIT*

Her eyes snapped back to their crooked angles and she shook her head like a wet dog.

“I think there ain’t no point in thinkin’ about that. Ain’t no fun to be had in bein’ a human. They’re for entertainin’.”

Dee’s eyes started to slip back toward toony as well, colorful rings starting to swirl in them. Drool was already drizzling from her lips as the scent of her toon companion tickled her nose. She leaned forward until her lips were touching the gleaming red clown nose of her companion. Her tongue dabbed out to lick it like a lollipop.

“Come on…” Dee said, struggling against the urge to gulp down this exquisite thing. Feel her adorable figure stretched tight in her neck as she gulped and swallowed, mind and body engulfed in the raw joy of being the fetish she was made to be. “W-we can stick together. We m-meant something to each other. We have some human in us… And I want a little more human in me.”

She wrapped her tongue around the red nose and slurped it into her mouth, rolling it about and nibbling on it while her plush pink body started to grind lewdly against Jane. The jester tugged her head back, popping her nose from Dee’s mouth.

“C-come on,” Dee said, now more controlled by her hunger than her logic. “Don’t tell me you don’t feel that ‘human audience’ buzz when we do our things together.”

A sparkle came to Jane’s eye. She wriggled free of Dee’s grasp and placed a hand on the dragon’s shoulder.

“You wanna feel the buzz, huh? Now that’s up my alley.”

Jane reached back one flipper of a hand, a small contraption flickering in the palm of it. Rather than grabbing Dee’s hand to apply the joy buzzer, she hooked her hand down and slapped it against the plump dragon’s crotch.

*BRRRRRZZZZZZZT*

Dee’s irises became pin pricks and her pink cheeks turned brilliant red with blush. She gasped as an electric shock teased between her legs with an intensity she never could have dreamed of. She twitched and jerked as the pleasure centers of her toony brain and body lit up like a pinball machine. Jane giggled and cackled like a mad scientist creating a monster as her buzzer made the dragon squirm. Dee panted and squealed, drinking in the pleasure with most of her mind but slowly teasing enough control away to uncoil her tail…

“Yeah…,” Jane said gleefully, mashing her buzzer more firmly. “You ain’t wrong! I’m feelin’ the buzz too!”

Suddenly, Dee’s pudgy pink tail coiled around Jane like a python. The jester was flipped unceremoniously upside down and her floppy feet were jammed between Dee’s legs. With a pop that caused Dee to quiver with delight and a quick slither, Jane sunk into her dragony-slit. Dee doubled over and grabbed Jane, pinning her arms to her side and starting to hump at her body, matching each thrust with a shove to jam the partner-turned sex-toy deeper. While she humped and bucked, she practically chanted, eyes incandescent with mania.

“Consume. Engulf. VORE. Gotta get you in me. Deeper. Squirming. Struggling. Mashed up and curled up. Get in my body. You belong inside me. I need you inside me.”

She mashed and shoved and squeezed Jane, finally pushing the jester’s head inside until only the tassels and hair remained outside. She flopped back, utterly fulfilled, as gentle waves of motion slurped the hair and tassels slowly inside. Dee huffed and puffed in the afterglow, lovingly hugging and stroking the bulging belly that finally contained her friend once more. She hiccuped lightly, then felt a rogue bump ripple across her tummy. A moment later, a second bump rose up, this one distinctly looking like the muted form of a flipper-like hand raising up. Dee’s eye twitched as she realized what was coming next, then her whole body started sparking with electric pleasure as the buzzer was applied from the INSIDE. Her body flickered, now and again becoming little more than a black outline with twin white skeletons inside, one convulsing with erotic pleasure and the other gleefully cackling with joy while squidging between its legs with the non-buzzer hand.

Dee didn’t know how long the whole ordeal lasted. All she knew was when it was through, she was smoldering and charred, her mind a mushy blob of sensual pleasure. When she could convince herself to move, she craned her neck to look over the dome of her belly and noticed, to her confusion, that there was a knotted handkerchief sticking out from between her legs. She snagged it and pulled, producing a blue one, then a green one, each knotted to the last. She shuddered with pleasure each time a knot popped free. She continued pulling, producing orange, yellow, polkadot, checkered, zebra-striped, little hearts, pure white, and then, with a squish, Jane.

The Jester shook herself and straightened her hair, then reached down to help the exhausted Dee up.

“You might be onto something, toots. That ain’t the usual toon-on-toon diddlin’. Maybe you an’ me’ll be a duo after all. But!” She reached into a previously non-existent pocket, rummaging about. “Just ‘cause you an’ me get a charge out of each other don’t mean things couldn’t be a lot better with some other folks to entertain.”

She pulled something out of her pocket and tossed it on the ground. It turned out to be a clown car, barely larger than a shoebox. She eased open a post-it note sized sun roof on the colorful car, then turned to Dee.

“Let’s hit the road, get to toon town, and find us some tourists to tease.”

Without waiting for Dee to reply, she hoisted the dragon over her head and slammed her down onto the car. Jane sprung up and started stomping and jumping on the pudgy pink lizard, gradually tamping the oversized body into the impossibly small vehicle until she was entirely inside, visible only as bulges of pink scales pressing against the windows and the sun roof. Once that job was done, Jane dusted off her flippers, opened the driver’s side door, and somehow crammed herself inside. A sputtering motor started up, and the little car rolled out of the room and toward the street. It had barely bounced down off the curb and pulled out into traffic before its suspension started squeaking with rhythmic bounces and puffy cartoon hearts started spilling out the tailpipe.

It was the beginning of quite a duo.

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